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Best to not wait if you don't have to. Fertility does decrease as you age. And another reason to have kids younger is the energy needed for raising a family. I had kids from my 20s to late 30s and the energy difference is staggering. The complications went up as well. There are a lot of people here suggesting it's just fine to wait into your 30s and 40s but the facts are not lining up with that. Fertility treatments are no fun to go through and are not cheap. Some couples end up breaking up over failed fertility treatments because it can be such a strain. You are young and you have some life to get in order before having a family but it is still great that you are thinking ahead. Sounds like you will do just fine.
However, she's still single and has been for a long while. Due to circumstances, she's not able to find anyone (much less the right guy) yet and is closer to being 30 in the near future.
I'll be done with my major towards the end of this year. The only issue is I'm now 28 (turning 29 in April) and it's been concerning me a bit not being able to find the right person. I'm not having too much luck in an online dating site. There are several guys whom I don't find physically attractive, several that don't want any type of commitment and one that I'm not even sure if he's going to visit me.
I had this sudden and unexplained change of mind starting this year way back in April or May. To my surprise it's not going away. I'm finding myself that I can't go back to my previous ''I have no desires to kids'' years anymore. It's like something in me changed. But why now when I don't have much time as I had before? Why this sudden change at the age of 28?
Are more women stuck in this position? Nope, I didn't slept around. I still only have the history of only having 1 past bf in my life.
I have only one friend who had a child that was planned before thirty. And I know a lot of people in very long term relationships---myself included. I think that has a lot to do with where I live/how I grew up though. Where I live many people don't start having children until they're in their thirties/even forties.
To me it seems like the people who are in long term relationships never really worried about it because they'll "get around to it" and the people who panic are those that are "getting older" but haven't found someone yet. I'm thirty and last year my husband and I had a, "So, baby in the next five years?" discussion. And we both said probably not. I think it's a little scarier for him because he's a few years older than me and he definitely wants a kid so I think in the back of his mind he worries a little.
Just don't rush! Don't actively seek out a man just to settle down with so you can pop out a kid only to be miserable after the fact.
However, she's still single and has been for a long while. Due to circumstances, she's not able to find anyone (much less the right guy) yet and is closer to being 30 in the near future.
I'll be done with my major towards the end of this year. The only issue is I'm now 28 (turning 29 in April) and it's been concerning me a bit not being able to find the right person. I'm not having too much luck in an online dating site. There are several guys whom I don't find physically attractive, several that don't want any type of commitment and one that I'm not even sure if he's going to visit me.
I had this sudden and unexplained change of mind starting this year way back in April or May. To my surprise it's not going away. I'm finding myself that I can't go back to my previous ''I have no desires to kids'' years anymore. It's like something in me changed. But why now when I don't have much time as I had before? Why this sudden change at the age of 28?
Are more women stuck in this position? Nope, I didn't slept around. I still only have the history of only having 1 past bf in my life.
St\\
Still to early to panic. If you don't have children well you don't have children no big deal. Main thing though it is far to early to panic.
Best to not wait if you don't have to. Fertility does decrease as you age. And another reason to have kids younger is the energy needed for raising a family. I had kids from my 20s to late 30s and the energy difference is staggering. The complications went up as well. There are a lot of people here suggesting it's just fine to wait into your 30s and 40s but the facts are not lining up with that. Fertility treatments are no fun to go through and are not cheap. Some couples end up breaking up over failed fertility treatments because it can be such a strain. You are young and you have some life to get in order before having a family but it is still great that you are thinking ahead. Sounds like you will do just fine.
This is true. You only have to look online at the thousands of infertility forums to see that you can't always have a child when you feel like it. It doesn't matter if you have a very healthy lifestyle either - age is always going to trump that. Getting pregnant from mid 30's onward can be very difficult, believe it or not.
Amazing the amount of horrible advice being given in this thread. To the OP, no, you should NOT wait, no, you DON'T have another decade to start thinking about it.
This idea that keeps being repeated ad nauseam that women should all postpone having kids until they're too old to do it is toxic and pernicious. You're almost 30, you should try to have kids as soon as possible, preferably before 30. Read what Kayekaye wrote, she/he is the only one giving you good advice.
Amazing the amount of horrible advice being given in this thread. To the OP, no, you should NOT wait, no, you DON'T have another decade to start thinking about it.
This idea that keeps being repeated ad nauseam that women should all postpone having kids until they're too old to do it is toxic and pernicious. You're almost 30, you should try to have kids as soon as possible, preferably before 30. Read what Kayekaye wrote, she/he is the only one giving you good advice.
Yes nothing like bringing a child into this world on a whim just because a magical age is approaching.
I'd say think it over and see how you feel in 6 months to a year then re-evaluate. I see nothing wrong with having children when you are a bit older but make sure it is for the right reasons and not just because you are getting older.
Also, not to worry people but I know of 6 women from mid 30's onward (including myself) who have had miscarriages. It is not just difficult to get pregnant from this age, it is difficult to keep a pregnancy too.
You know these famous people that have babies well into their 40's? They have probably paid for very expensive donor egg/donor embryo treatment.
Of course, there will always be women who 'get lucky' at whatever age but why chance it?
This is a tough one, but 29 is certainly not old. You do have time, but I also believe in making your own life. If a child is something you really want, there are other ways. My friend adopted a child from foster care on her own, my other friend decided to have a child with a friend of hers ( guy friend) who also really wanted a child, another friend of mine had a child through a donor. I know people will judge these choices, but some people never do end up meeting a marriage partner, but still want a child, and there are ways to make that happen.
25, 30, 35, 40, none of these are magic numbers. You are not going to wake up on your 35th birthday dramatically less fertile than you were the day or month before. The thing is you never know how fertile or infertile you might be until you start trying to get pregnant. Since you don't even have a serious boyfriend at this time I wouldn't spend a minute worrying about what may or may not happen five years from now.
For the record, plenty of women get pregnant naturally after 35 and have perfectly healthy babies. I got pregnant the second month off birth control and had a beautiful healthy baby at the ripe old age of 37. My sister and my best friend both had babies at 35 and they got pregnant easily. A coworker in her mid-twenties has been trying to get pregnant for three years with no luck.
For now, enjoy your life. Date, have fun, see what happens. You might not even want kids five years from now or you might be happily married with a screaming brat to call your own.
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