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I love my girlfriend, she is my world. However, I just can't seem to trust her. She has never done anything to make me believe that she is being unfaithful. The reasons I can't trust her is because of all these stories I hear about girlfriends who cheat. It just bothers me to know that a girl can cheat, and go on with her everyday life as if nothing happened. In certain cases, the boyfriend/husband will never find out about it. I know im being extremely insecure, but the thought of another man in bed with my girlfriend would literally kill me (I would commit suicide if I were ever to find out). So, I believe I'm dealing with some internal conflict within my head that is causing me to think this way.
Also, this is hurting my relationship, my girlfriend is getting a little fed up due to the fact that I can't trust her or any woman at all. I hate feeling this way but I feel its the only I can protect myself.
Another issue may be is that I am my girlfriends first. First boyfriend, and first lover. I'm scared that one day she will feel like she's missed out on life and begin to sleep with multiple partners, just to get it out her system (Idk I guess i'm just looking for excuses).
Can anyone help me out?
The word is men do it more but women do it better. I understand what you saying but you have to let that weak mind set go, you are important man, you have to value yourself. You can love her deeply but never put her on a pedestal.
She has never done anything to make me believe that she is being unfaithful. The reasons I can't trust her is because of all these stories I hear about girlfriends who cheat.
Can anyone help me out?
SO STOP LISTENING TO OTHER PEOPLE! If you can't get past these issues let her go untill you can, don't blame her for issues that your having it's not fair to her or yourself. IF you REALLY loved her then you wouldn't feel this way.
That isn't really helpful to this particular OP, who has trust issues and other issues. Your comment is just going to feed his unfounded paranoia.
Trusting is the gamble you take when finding someone to share your life with. The OP is actively and consciously choosing to be distrustful of his GF, so he needs to let her go because she doesn't deserve to be with someone who clings and controls and is very push/pull with her based on issues in his own mind.
Others have already given you some good advice, so I'll take this opportunity to tell you "I get it." I had very real reasons to distrust women (my ex-wife cheated on me). After my divorce was final, I went through several relationships with women I knew were not in my future (long term). I think I did so mainly because I didn't want to confront the need to trust another woman.
Fast-forward about two years...
I met a woman (who is now my wife of exactly two weeks today) and I quickly realized that trust was a major source of conflict for me. No, she never gave me a reason to suspect anything, but I had this major block in my head that was preventing me from giving that part of my psyche away. It took me a while, and I had to make very conscious efforts to trust her. And, I am here to tell you, it all worked out. I trust my wife with all my heart, and don't feel any doubts about her in any way. I know she loves me with all of her being, and would never hurt me in such a way.
My point is this: If you really want to trust a woman, and you find yourself unable to do so, do what others have suggested and take a step back to examine yourself. You owe it to yourself firstly, and women in your life secondly. You might find that there is some reason behind this insecurity, and you may even want to consider counseling in order to rectify that issue.
I love my girlfriend, she is my world. However, I just can't seem to trust her. She has never done anything to make me believe that she is being unfaithful. The reasons I can't trust her is because of all these stories I hear about girlfriends who cheat. It just bothers me to know that a girl can cheat, and go on with her everyday life as if nothing happened. In certain cases, the boyfriend/husband will never find out about it. I know im being extremely insecure, but the thought of another man in bed with my girlfriend would literally kill me (I would commit suicide if I were ever to find out). So, I believe I'm dealing with some internal conflict within my head that is causing me to think this way.
Also, this is hurting my relationship, my girlfriend is getting a little fed up due to the fact that I can't trust her or any woman at all. I hate feeling this way but I feel its the only I can protect myself.
Another issue may be is that I am my girlfriends first. First boyfriend, and first lover. I'm scared that one day she will feel like she's missed out on life and begin to sleep with multiple partners, just to get it out her system (Idk I guess i'm just looking for excuses).
Can anyone help me out?
Uhhhh....sounds like you could benefit from a therapist. It is not NORMAL to think the way you are thinking and feeling. I've seen a therapist before, if it were free I'd go every week. You'll feel a lot better and it will help you get your head on straight and hopefully keep your relationship.
Jonathanp219...not everyone cheats...a lot of us don't. The best relationships are the ones built on trust, so trust your girl and don't project what you think could, or might happen into your relationship, because you'll not experience the contentment and satisfaction with life if you waste it worrying about something that may never transpire..I've been with my SO for 38 years...good ones...as I've chosen to trust that there is fidelity, and respect between us...when you lose the misplaced worry, you'll be a happier person, something that will only make your relationship stronger.
I've already been to a psychologist, I've had clinical depression since a young age. Ever since i've gotten into a relationship, i've been paranoid about what she does when im not around whether it be in school or just during her free time.
I have a friend who supposedly has a "good relationship" but he tracks his girlfriends whereabouts through this app that he installed into her smartphone. I don't really judge him because I feel that's just normal man behavior to want to know where your woman is at all times.
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