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She was tested at University by students in the psych department. Although they used a standardized assessment tool. it can't "count" as a diagnosis but she still fit the criteria. It is also pretty obvious by her threads and inability to understand social constructs. In any case they gave her papers with resources for follow up after her testing but of course OP never followed through.
I think you seem to be looking at this backward. Instead of saying "I like playful teasing in the context of a friendship when everyone gets it and no one is hurtful, so how can I find someone to do this with me?"
You should perhaps be saying "I miss when I had some supportive enjoyable friendships in which we could engage in friendly teasing in a way that everybody gets it and no one is hurtful, so how might I make some new friends?"
You need the comfortable relationship in which the playful teasing happens FIRST. It doesn't make any sense to think that you could somehow find someone you don't really know to playfully tease with you, and THEN become friends.
I think this is an accurate read, and it also brings into sharp focus the fact that, while, what the OP is essentially saying is that she no longer has a group of friends who banter with her in this manner, she's looking at it solely from a lens of what SHE gets out of such a friendship. She's completely focused on what the interaction would do for her, and not really looking at such things within the context of a reciprocal relationship, where you get something out of it, and also give something. It's a very auto-centric (hence autism) view of interpersonal behavior. Her focus is on what the relationship does for her (I get to learn valuable social skills through observation/others' modeling, which in turn makes me feel more adept in my own behavior). It's all about her attempting to gain social skills through studying the example of others. Not about actually gaining friends. It's more that she essentially wants to "research" behavior that doesn't come naturally to her in a nearly anthropological way, so she can memorize and replicate it.
I think this is an accurate read, and it also brings into sharp focus the fact that, while, what the OP is essentially saying is that she no longer has a group of friends who banter with her in this manner, she's looking at it solely from a lens of what SHE gets out of such a friendship. She's completely focused on what the interaction would do for her, and not really looking at such things within the context of a reciprocal relationship, where you get something out of it, and also give something. It's a very auto-centric (hence autism) view of interpersonal behavior. Her focus is on what the relationship does for her (I get to learn valuable social skills through observation/others' modeling, which in turn makes me feel more adept in my own behavior). It's all about her attempting to gain social skills through studying the example of others. Not about actually gaining friends. It's more that she essentially wants to "research" behavior that doesn't come naturally to her in a nearly anthropological way, so she can memorize and replicate it.
I have noticed that I'm, possibly by nature, quite selfish. Maybe I'm not really willing to understand the give and take nature of friendship sometimes and actually become a bit frustrated when asked to meet another's needs outside of my terms. I guess I should be happy I have the few friends I do.
If you can keep it nice at any case and your thinking fits togeter with your playmate, play away... But always only if you both are on the same page..
As they say you need 20 positive things against 1 negative. Teasing a stranger, not a good idea.. Teasing a good friend or loved one, what a greaat idea...
Of course as long as you enjoy of same type of teasing...
Some people love to mock or spank each other, not my beef at all
Some people like to harass and play and tease with no hurting, by all love.. Well that is my beef but my ways to tease are very childish indeed.
I just call it teasing which itself is a wrong term but it would not be teasing if my threat would not be worse than what is coming.. For example I tend to tease my hubby by saying I did something nasty on his clothes or car or what ever and instead finding something negative there is something overly cute waiting
Teasing.. One of the greatest joys in life
Just keep it mind to check time to time that you both enjoy of it, people are able to wound each other so easily, without any harm is meant.. easily apart.. Sometimes as a result of playfull teasing which once went into a wrong way or was misundertood. If you lose friends that you teased you might ask yourself if it was you who went too far... If not, then they just don't know how to appreciate your skills
Also one thing.. text message and online texting teasing could be dangerous.. Because another does not hear your voice or smirking or smiling.. Bodily messages and voice are important thing when you are tricking.
And always it could fail whenever, dangerous hobby indeed
Anyway.. If you just like to be mocked try native american and asian boards, they seem to have quite attraction on it more than other places that I have seen
we live in an easily offended world,,,,tough to tease today, without someone taking it to an extreme..
I gave up teasing ..especially in the workplace, 15 yrs ago..,,when just about any teasing can be parlayed into harassment..
I do see a gender divide...women can be teasing or very sarcastic,,,while men have to watch every word they say..this is outside of work..although after some drinks,,, people tend to lighten up
As a child, I was introduced by my friends to a certain kind of social play that's between teasing and mocking, but it's not done to be mean. I haven't been able to find anyone willing to play with me like that since I became an adult. Sure, I've encountered plenty of people willing to mock and be condescending, especially the kids I work with, but that was mostly destructive, not reparative. I like reparative teasing and wish I could find people willing to engage in it with me.
I guess my fascination with it has to do with me not being able to read social cues that well. It's nice to have my faults called out to me in a humorous and non-threatening way. I've been thinking about maybe taking some comedy classes to see if I could maybe find someone willing to playfully tease me. I haven't partaken in that since I was a child, and I'm not able to reciprocate at all; my jokes usually seem much more harmful than they are; plus I work with kids, so it's not a good habit to get into. In it's place, though, it's almost fun, when done correctly. It's a very delicate art, though, that can come off as abrasive if done excessively, I suppose.
What are your experiences with playful teasing? In your opinion, is it something I should have grown out of? Where do you think it might be acceptable to engage in this?
Don't close friends "roast" each other sometimes? Sometimes they even "roast" themselves!
Not really once past adolescence to maybe very early 20's, and much more common among men than women. None of my friends and I mock or point out each other's flaws. Me am older brother do, but that's different, he's been teasing me for 53 years now. It's not a game we decide to play though, it's how we naturally interact with each other. The idea of planning it or asking someone to "play" with you this way is just not at all how it happens. Making friends in general has to come first, but you have posted many times you avoid being social with other teachers and others you see on a regular basis. Your actions don't match your stated goals.
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