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I've lost mine. Tried to kill myself. Failed. Took medication. 300MG finally made me stable. No more interest in my old hobbies. They were all artsy stuff and traveling, mostly. I don't see life as a big fun game/region anymore so can't get into my art or care to travel. Too cynical now. Also a little bored as a result. Job sucks, although it could be worse. Thankful I'm working and the job is easy at least. I'm here right now!!! Moving soon. Trying to change .get a career. Trying to meet people. Trying and trying. Playing the long game, but no zest for it. Like going through the motions before you kick a field goal. Based on what I've said, what would you recommend to me to recapture the zest for life I once had?
No recommendation is too little or too crazy. I will try to do your recommendations and return with the result. If you would like ot know more personal details, I will gladly share, while being careful to omit anything that might reveal my real life identity. Mind you, I have little to no online presence's anyway...
I have dealt with depression, anxiety and OCD (all likely courtesy of my ADD) over the years, and I'm almost 40. For the past decade or so, I've seen my happiness steadily increase.
-I've put myself out there socially and cultivated friendships with really good and positive people. No toxic jerks.
-I volunteer for an organization with goals that are important to me.
-I have some awesome dogs, and I work hard to train them. I view them as a social opportunity. We take classes and participate in dog sports together, which allows me to meet people with similar interests.
-I focus on remaining positive and optimistic (though still maintaining a logical and realistic perspective). Negative thoughts are something I tend to push away.
-I make a conscious choice every day to be happy. I take pleasure in minor things very deliberately. And I focus on being grateful for the things I have. When you're living in the U.S., you have a better standard of living than probably 80% of the rest of the world. Just by waking up as you, you've hit the jackpot, in a way.
-I spend a lot of time outside, even if it's just walking around the block.
Being happy and having a "zest for life" is actually kind of a lot of work. But once you can reach that level, maintaining it can be second nature. There's always going to be a lot to be depressed about in the world. So you can either brood or you can appreciate what you have and take steps to make the world a better place for other folks. I chose the latter a long time ago, and it has made all the difference.
Volunteer at a hospital for children, a nursing home, or for the Special Olympics. Pour more into others. Making others happy will make you happy and give much needed endorphins. Love. Love. Love.
I have dealt with depression, anxiety and OCD (all likely courtesy of my ADD) over the years, and I'm almost 40. For the past decade or so, I've seen my happiness steadily increase.
-I've put myself out there socially and cultivated friendships with really good and positive people. No toxic jerks.
-I volunteer for an organization with goals that are important to me.
-I have some awesome dogs, and I work hard to train them. I view them as a social opportunity. We take classes and participate in dog sports together, which allows me to meet people with similar interests.
-I focus on remaining positive and optimistic (though still maintaining a logical and realistic perspective). Negative thoughts are something I tend to push away.
-I make a conscious choice every day to be happy. I take pleasure in minor things very deliberately. And I focus on being grateful for the things I have. When you're living in the U.S., you have a better standard of living than probably 80% of the rest of the world. Just by waking up as you, you've hit the jackpot, in a way.
-I spend a lot of time outside, even if it's just walking around the block.
Being happy and having a "zest for life" is actually kind of a lot of work. But once you can reach that level, maintaining it can be second nature. There's always going to be a lot to be depressed about in the world. So you can either brood or you can appreciate what you have and take steps to make the world a better place for other folks. I chose the latter a long time ago, and it has made all the difference.
Great post.
I would also recommend reading and implementing suggestions from The How of Happiness by Sonja Lyubomirsky. She gives a menu of 12 different options and suggests you pick 3 or 4 things from the menu and do them consistently. But as you said, JrzDefector, it does take effort. Some of the suggestions might seem old fashioned, but all of the suggestions are backed up by research that shows this stuff works if you do it.
Thanks for some of the post. Perhaps some of the problem lies in the fact I have not a single friend in the world. I just don't tend to connect with people, or feel close, that I can take acquaintance to the next level. I've been searching to fill that void with a partner, but maybe friendship should come first.
Advice someone who was depressed, although on medication no where close to my dose once told me is that she tries to speak with strangers as much as possible. I get that. I actually did that once when depressed about 4-5 years ago. It helped a bit...but I find people where I am now just aren't friendly. Everyone looks grumpy.
My Doctor actually told me I will probably be on my meds for a long time since I have technically been depressed multiple times...just the last time being the first time I tried to kill myself.
*I know I sound super down, but the funny thing is I feel very hopeful about the future in certain areas...but just not the "zest of life" kind of hopeful. Does that make sense?
I will order that book tonight when I get home. Will try to read through it by next week!
Thanks for some of the post. Perhaps some of the problem lies in the fact I have not a single friend in the world. I just don't tend to connect with people, or feel close, that I can take acquaintance to the next level. I've been searching to fill that void with a partner, but maybe friendship should come first.
Advice someone who was depressed, although on medication no where close to my dose once told me is that she tries to speak with strangers as much as possible. I get that. I actually did that once when depressed about 4-5 years ago. It helped a bit...but I find people where I am now just aren't friendly. Everyone looks grumpy.
My Doctor actually told me I will probably be on my meds for a long time since I have technically been depressed multiple times...just the last time being the first time I tried to kill myself.
*I know I sound super down, but the funny thing is I feel very hopeful about the future in certain areas...but just not the "zest of life" kind of hopeful. Does that make sense?
I will order that book tonight when I get home. Will try to read through it by next week!
I really admire your determination and the way you're being proactive. And yes, I understand what you're talking about
Look, I started taking Zoloft a couple years ago in a low dose to deal with a particularly anxiety-inducing time. That anxiety is long past, but the Zoloft is just part of my life. It's not that I need it now, but it's there to head my tendency towards anxiety off at the pass if anything goes pear-shaped. I think I'm taking like a quarter of the normal dosage. I'm a big fan of meds when they help, and they sound like they're helping you. Just recognize you may have to rejigger your dosages or even switch medications from time to time - it may be helpful to keep a diary to increase your self-awareness so that you can recognize if things are getting derailed.
Do you have anything that you were particularly passionate about? I would look for a meetup group in your area or maybe even start one yourself. If you like dogs and want to own one, you could get into dog sports - the community is very welcoming. Nosework and flyball are two activities that are low on the cost spectrum, in particular. If you're even remotely athletic, try joining a league for softball, kickball, volleyball, whatever. Or a runner's or cycling group. Take some cooking or language classes maybe.
And if you have the time and it won't stress you out, maybe consider a part-time job at a business that reflects your interests. I still have close friendships with people I worked with at a book/music store over 15 years ago in a totally different part of the country. They're a pretty diverse bunch in terms of age and gender, but the friendships have their roots in our shared love of books, music and movies. We don't even like the same things, but we love to talk about those things.
Thanks for some of the post. Perhaps some of the problem lies in the fact I have not a single friend in the world. I just don't tend to connect with people, or feel close, that I can take acquaintance to the next level. I've been searching to fill that void with a partner, but maybe friendship should come first.
Advice someone who was depressed, although on medication no where close to my dose once told me is that she tries to speak with strangers as much as possible. I get that. I actually did that once when depressed about 4-5 years ago. It helped a bit...but I find people where I am now just aren't friendly. Everyone looks grumpy.
My Doctor actually told me I will probably be on my meds for a long time since I have technically been depressed multiple times...just the last time being the first time I tried to kill myself.
*I know I sound super down, but the funny thing is I feel very hopeful about the future in certain areas...but just not the "zest of life" kind of hopeful. Does that make sense?
I will order that book tonight when I get home. Will try to read through it by next week!
Oh, by the way, a Mediterranean diet can also help reduce depression. Doctors tend to not know about or ignore the importance of nutrition.
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