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I regret it all and have changed but they won't see me like this. I was thinking this recent visit after all these years would make them reconsider their opinions?
Doubt they will reconsider their opinions. Some things in the past cannot be erased.
Doubt they will reconsider their opinions. Some things in the past cannot be erased.
I agree. If you had sickened and killed my pets and bullied my child, I wouldn't care if you had turned into a clone of Mother Theresa. Goody for you, but stay the hell away from me and mine for all time.
I would like to say I'm ashamed of my past and it'll always follow me. Though at time point, would the slate ever be wiped clean?
My parents and I moved away long ago (in addition, I've been living on my own since my 2014 HS graduation) and the only reason we stopped by once in a while is because a couple other relatives live a couple doors from them. They are all friends.
Last week my parents and I stopped by for a visit. The couple hardly spoke to me other than a simple hi. I could tell by their expressions they weren't expecting to see me. They still won't let go of how rotten I was during my childhood years. I didn't want to cause more inconveniene so I left.
I won't go into too much details but yes as a kid (8-12 years old), I bullied their son with my friends who right now is my same age (mostly emotional but last time it was physical and he had a bruise on his cheeks). I wasn't nice to their pets either. One night their two guinea pigs disappeared. Unfortunately, yes I did something bad to them and wasn't caught.
I regret it all and have changed but they won't see me like this. I was thinking this recent visit after all these years would make them reconsider their opinions?
Move on. I would not forget those things. It's unrealistic to expect that they would. Cruelty to animals is not normal, even for kids. Bullying is not normal, either. Only certain kinds of people have it in them to do it. That thing within them....that stays, IMO. It's curbed, as one grows up. But it's still there.
You need to move on to people who don't have a history with you.
If someone did something bad to my pets I'd never want to be cordial to them again, they'd be lucky if I didn't retaliate (and I'm NOT a violent person but mess with my pets and see),
I've changed from what I was back then. Now I wouldn't even think about hurting anything nor anyone.
Since it's unlikely I'll ever go to another meeting, I'm going to try to find them on fb. I'm still not sure if that guy is really him.
Nancy, let me give you one piece of advice, there are some things in life better left alone and unsaid. I get you feel bad, I get that you want them to know you feel bad and that you're not that person anymore.
The thing you've got to understand is they may not (or probably don't) want to hear it and then you need to make peace with it or at least learn to live with it. THAT is where therapy comes in.
You will be miserable for the rest of your life if you continue down the road you're walking, so much so you could get to the point at which people end their own lives. Again THAT is where therapy comes in. There are things we do that can never be "made right", that is a fact.
I'd bet most people on here have things they wished they'd not done, the successful ones are those that learn from it, never to repeat it and then leave it in the past where it belongs.
Apologizing is always a good idea whether it's accepted or not!
+1 I agree!
OP, I do suggest that you get counseling to understand why you hurt people and animals before. A professional can advise you better than we can on this forum.
I'm glad that you regret your past behavior and want to become a better person. It's a positive sign that you are beginning to realize the extremely harmful mindset you had when you were younger.
Please seek out a qualified counselor to help you find the best way to truly move beyond your past. This is important to do regardless of how the people mentioned in your post react to you now.
you got some real soul searching to do..I'm in the camp that if you ever hurt, let alone kill any of my pets I would NEVER want to see your sorry ass again..that being said, I wish you the best..
Mod cut. The OP is confused why the neighbors are still angry that he killed their pets and bullied their child only 8 years ago??? Really?! That is not something I would ever forgive someone for, and there is no way I would ever want them in my house, or for them to be contacting me on social media.
Last edited by PJSaturn; 03-05-2018 at 03:34 PM..
Reason: Personal attack; calling out a member.
I would like to say I'm ashamed of my past and it'll always follow me. Though at time point, would the slate ever be wiped clean?
My parents and I moved away long ago (in addition, I've been living on my own since my 2014 HS graduation) and the only reason we stopped by once in a while is because a couple other relatives live a couple doors from them. They are all friends.
Last week my parents and I stopped by for a visit. The couple hardly spoke to me other than a simple hi. I could tell by their expressions they weren't expecting to see me. They still won't let go of how rotten I was during my childhood years. I didn't want to cause more inconveniene so I left.
I won't go into too much details but yes as a kid (8-12 years old), I bullied their son with my friends who right now is my same age (mostly emotional but last time it was physical and he had a bruise on his cheeks). I wasn't nice to their pets either. One night their two guinea pigs disappeared. Unfortunately, yes I did something bad to them and wasn't caught.
I regret it all and have changed but they won't see me like this. I was thinking this recent visit after all these years would make them reconsider their opinions?
Why should they forgive you for treating their child and animals so poorly? It's been a couple of years, yes, but you left emotional scars that will probably never go away. And it sounds like you murdered their pets! I wouldn't forgive. I wouldn't allow you in my home. I'd want absolutely nothing to do with you.
They do not have to get over your past. Not sure why you think they owe you anything. They don't owe you forgiveness. They don't owe you a clean slate. You inflicted pain on them - repeatedly. That doesn't go away because you want it to.
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