Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Today me and my girlfriend were shopping for food and getting dog food for our dogs. We go off in separate directions to vet our items.
Here's the creepy part: She comes up to me and tells me some guy has been following her around through the store.. Once the guy saw me he left out of the store. I actually felt a cold vibe from him.
Is pre-judging fair, to assume the person is creepy because of a "vibe"? If someone feels uncomfortable and the person is "creepy" because the person is black, wouldn't that be racism?
Today me and my girlfriend were shopping for food and getting dog food for our dogs. We go off in separate directions to vet our items.
Here's the creepy part: She comes up to me and tells me some guy has been following her around through the store.. Once the guy saw me he left out of the store. I actually felt a cold vibe from him.
I thought the women here usually exaggerated this on another thread but when you see it for yourself.
It's definitely creepy.
I don't assume that anyone is exaggerating, but I have not had the experience that some women have, of being persistently bothered by, say, "cat-callers" or unwanted attention from strangers, nor from men (or anyone) following me around.
I had a conversation with a woman not long ago, and I trust women to give me reliable opinions on subjects like my own looks, far more than I trust men. She said I was not "conventionally pretty" but could easily be that way if I'd wear makeup or use other "girl tricks" but that I become very attractive when I talk, because of how expressive my face is. Which I suppose probably is a big part of why I am not pestered by random strangers in public much. I am grateful for it.
The people (usually men) who really go creep-mode on me, tend to be the ones that I was nice to a little bit, in the way that I am just generally nice to people. They are the ones who, when I give them that inch of friendliness and attention, want to take a mile and presume they can get sex or love or whatever from me. And it is, unfortunately, THAT, which makes many women behave in less friendly and approachable ways in general. Assuming everybody has an agenda, and thinks they're slick and they can shmooze you and get what they want. However, I work to avoid letting such experiences make me cynical and cold, because I keep in my mind the many, many more examples of people who have responded appropriately to my positive energy. I don't let the bad apples ruin my opinion of the whole barrel.
I don't assume that anyone is exaggerating, but I have not had the experience that some women have, of being persistently bothered by, say, "cat-callers" or unwanted attention from strangers, nor from men (or anyone) following me around.
I had a conversation with a woman not long ago, and I trust women to give me reliable opinions on subjects like my own looks, far more than I trust men. She said I was not "conventionally pretty" but could easily be that way if I'd wear makeup or use other "girl tricks" but that I become very attractive when I talk, because of how expressive my face is. Which I suppose probably is a big part of why I am not pestered by random strangers in public much. I am grateful for it.
The people (usually men) who really go creep-mode on me, tend to be the ones that I was nice to a little bit, in the way that I am just generally nice to people. They are the ones who, when I give them that inch of friendliness and attention, want to take a mile and presume they can get sex or love or whatever from me. And it is, unfortunately, THAT, which makes many women behave in less friendly and approachable ways in general. Assuming everybody has an agenda, and thinks they're slick and they can shmooze you and get what they want. However, I work to avoid letting such experiences make me cynical and cold, because I keep in my mind the many, many more examples of people who have responded appropriately to my positive energy. I don't let the bad apples ruin my opinion of the whole barrel.
I wonder if some of those are just the lonely and desperate types that do this. Because I've gone through similar circumstances where I am merely polite to some people only to have them wanting to claim me for their ownership so to speak. I've been followed around and stalked. I've had demands made on me. I've had people try to take me away from my work (I don't get paid to hang out with them).
One of them even wanted me to spend all of my money and just depend on him.
But while they are lonely and desperate, they are ultimately responsible for their own joy. Often times, this causes "creepy" behavior so to speak.
A lot of things that creeped me out are starting to seem normal. It's like people are either losing their sense of boundaries or they are just changing.
I wonder if some of those are just the lonely and desperate types that do this. Because I've gone through similar circumstances where I am merely polite to some people only to have them wanting to claim me for their ownership so to speak. I've been followed around and stalked. I've had demands made on me. I've had people try to take me away from my work (I don't get paid to hang out with them).
One of them even wanted me to spend all of my money and just depend on him.
But while they are lonely and desperate, they are ultimately responsible for their own joy. Often times, this causes "creepy" behavior so to speak.
A lot of things that creeped me out are starting to seem normal. It's like people are either losing their sense of boundaries or they are just changing.
I guess to me, it's like how occasionally a celebrity will get the kind of stalker or obsessed fan who believes they have some kind of a relationship or a destiny, and starts really shaping their identity around this bond, which only exists in the mind of the fan...not in the mind of the celebrity at ALL, for whom this other person is basically a stranger. Just because, say, the celebrity signed a thing, "Love, Tony Danza" or whatever does not mean that in fact, Mr. Danza does love you and wants to be with you.
Normal people get it.
Some people though...really don't, and they don't want to, even when they are TOLD, "Dude. Me, you, we are not a thing. Not gonna BE a thing. I need you to chill out, back off, and cut it out."
The guy I am dealing with right now, then says that "Ohhh, no I have no agenda... I just want to be your friend..." acts like it was all this cute, innocent misunderstanding. And then keeps testing my fences like a velociraptor who thinks he's sneaky. YOU'RE NOT SNEAKY, VELOCIRAPTOR GUY. I SEE YOU.
I don't assume that anyone is exaggerating, but I have not had the experience that some women have, of being persistently bothered by, say, "cat-callers" or unwanted attention from strangers, nor from men (or anyone) following me around.
Based on your posts I imagine you project quite a bit of confidence and awareness, which often deters opportunistic creepers. I think women who look like they would and could turn around and rip a strip off you for this behavior tend to be followed/hassled less by strangers. Subway (or wherever) creeper types often prefer to pursue someone they think they can get away with creeping on, which may mean someone who is distracted, seems meek, is smaller or younger, etc.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
