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That's what I tell people here when they're like "why do you want to move back?".
It's not that one group of people is better than the other, it's just different. Maybe "welcoming" to a New Englander is different than a true Southerner, I don't know.
I'm in Holly Springs now and would love to move up to Maine. We're probably going to be in the northern MA, southern NH area when we move back up there, but we always vacation in Maine.
And you hit the nail on the head about New England...the people are so welcoming (regardless of where you go to church - which seems to be a prerequesite here).
I had to lol at the church comment: Since moving to ME, not one single person has asked if, or which, church we attend. In NC it happened a lot. As for friendly people, we have made more good friends in our year in Maine than we did in 3 years in NC. We lived in a big subdivision in Holly Springs (Holly Glen) and I never felt very welcome there. Again, not knocking NC. There are some great things about the area. It just wasn't for us...
I had to lol at the church comment: Since moving to ME, not one single person has asked if, or which, church we attend. In NC it happened a lot. As for friendly people, we have made more good friends in our year in Maine than we did in 3 years in NC. We lived in a big subdivision in Holly Springs (Holly Glen) and I never felt very welcome there. Again, not knocking NC. There are some great things about the area. It just wasn't for us...
Ironically I have never had the church comment thrown my way down here. I guess I have that "saintly" look about me.
We looked in Holly Glen at the homes and ended up about 3 miles form there but in Fuquay. I have to go up Avent Ferry to go the schools up there and the traffic can be ridiculously bad. I don't know how people do it sometimes!!
Ironically I have never had the church comment thrown my way down here. I guess I have that "saintly" look about me.
We looked in Holly Glen at the homes and ended up about 3 miles form there but in Fuquay. I have to go up Avent Ferry to go the schools up there and the traffic can be ridiculously bad. I don't know how people do it sometimes!!
Fuquay is nice too! (or as a former co-worker used to call it: Funky-Varina.)We moved away before the new middle school on Avent Ferry Rd. opened. But even with the new elementary school and high school traffic was pretty bad, so I can just imagine what it's like now that all 3 schools are open!
Well said, Nervous-in-New England. It's funny to read all the different opinions, and that's one of the things that makes each of us unique.
We moved to NC 2 years ago after having spent 10 years in New England. In that 10 years, our neighbors spoke to us less than a handful of times. Oftentimes, they avoided looking our way to avoid even so much as a wave. Without family in the area, it was a very lonely feeling.
In addition to the coldness from people that we experienced, the cold snowy winters became unbearable for me. My husband on the other hand was a Buffalo native and enjoyed the cold weather and used to be an avid skiier in western NY. That activity was not an option in NE because the cost of living kept us pretty much living paycheck to paycheck. So snow and cold became a burden even to him when all it meant was more shoveling and snowblowing. In addition, our home was heated by oil. By the time we left NE, we were paying as much as $600 every 6 weeks for 1/2 a tank of oil to heat our 2400 sq. ft. home. Even at that cost I still wasn't warm, having the thermostat set to only 68 to try to save on even a higher oil bill.
Not only was the cost of heat killing us, but the taxes were becoming rediculous. We paid more than double what we pay here for property tax, and we have over 1000 more sq. ft. here. Moving to NC lifted a huge financial burden off our shoulders.
Not everything is happily ever after here, but for our family it was the best move we could have made.
Last edited by Strongasabear; 09-04-2010 at 07:31 AM..
What town & state were you living in up there? I lived in SW and Glastonbury up in CT and Gbury was supposed to be very snobby. We had great neighbors in the neighborhoods we were in and the folks from the neighborhood where I grew up still get together at least once a year for our golf tournament.
The other aspect of friendliness that people seem not to mention is that of co-workers. In the 5 years I have worked in NC, I have seen very little camaraderie from my co-workers where the folks up in CT were incredibly friendly and fun. One company I worked for in NC kept the workers completely separated (by dept) and wanted nothing to do any type of company outing or social event. In CT, we all got to know each others families and have work events. From what I gather though, there seems to be a stifling of that as of late due to the off-shore mentality that seems to be pervasive everywhere. It is a shame!
I had to lol at the church comment: Since moving to ME, not one single person has asked if, or which, church we attend. In NC it happened a lot. As for friendly people, we have made more good friends in our year in Maine than we did in 3 years in NC. We lived in a big subdivision in Holly Springs (Holly Glen) and I never felt very welcome there. Again, not knocking NC. There are some great things about the area. It just wasn't for us...
Different experiences for different people. I was born/raised in RI. Lived in several states for about 12 years after I was married. We returned to RI where we remained for 20 years prior to moving to Cary 2.5 years ago. We've made more friends (and great ones at that!) in the 2.5 yrs here than in the 20 yrs in our previous RI neighborhood. We have found this area so much friendlier than RI and we're both native New Englanders! Oh, and for the record, I've NEVER had anyone ask me what I church I go to down here.
Different experiences for different people. I was born/raised in RI. Lived in several states for about 12 years after I was married. We returned to RI where we remained for 20 years prior to moving to Cary 2.5 years ago. We've made more friends (and great ones at that!) in the 2.5 yrs here than in the 20 yrs in our previous RI neighborhood. We have found this area so much friendlier than RI and we're both native New Englanders! Oh, and for the record, I've NEVER had anyone ask me what I church I go to down here.
So true! In addition to ME and NC, I've also lived in NJ and spend over 20 years in WI. All 4 states are unique in their own way. I'm just happy to finally be in a place that truly feels like home to me! Nice to hear that you seem to have found the same in Cary!
As for the church question, I wasn't asked every day in NC which church we attend, but it did happen at least once a month. Just my personal experience...
I have read many comments/complaints about what folks have found once they moved to this area. I wrote this in a blog I maintain. It's a bit of "tongue in cheek" humor but ... basically says what a lot of "natives" are thinking.
Carolina Transplants
Ok …..you transplants. I have just about had enough of your whining. You’re not happy. It’s too hot and humid. Housing prices are high. You wish you were back in … wherever. You miss a certain food. All these religious people are annoying…. Wah! Wah! Wah!
Here is a news flash. It wouldn’t matter where you were, you would be unhappy because that’s just the kind of person you are. Your happiness quotient prior to your move was already determined by your attitude and your lack of research. Check the weather records and you’ll find it has always been hot and humid here!!! Did you contact the Chamber of Commerce or a realtor prior to your move to get statistical information about the economy and housing? Why did you think this area of the country was traditionally called the “Bible Belt?” Did you do your research on places to worship before you moved to see if there is a religious community that mirrors your belief system?
Most of you are “Whiney Wives” who were dragged here by your husbands because your “utopia” had no jobs! You are so filled with the desire to stay where you are that it leaves no room for appreciation of your new location. Those of you who came for jobs and whine about being here are sucking up our resources. You don’t like your job but have to be here. Your children are filling up our schools. Your family members whine about what they can’t find here that they had at home or the lack of a certain sporting team… here is what I have to say about that… Go Back Where You Came From!!! We want pleasant, happy people who love being here and are grateful for the opportunities our area provides.
I have a few perspectives on this matter. I was born in Raleigh. SHOCK!! Yes… there were actually people living and working here prior to IBM’s arrival and the subsequent “immigration.” I am tourism professional and understand the sense of “place” for people. I also moved to a totally different state with a completely different climate and way of living.
Here is my discovery. You and you alone are totally responsible for your happiness. It is a choice. I knew that my young son would embrace his new home with a sense of adventure based on the attitude I had and how he saw that in me. I knew if I chose to be miserable, I would make my family miserable and my husband’s promotion a living hell. Finally, I would be making myself unhappy. Why would I choose that for myself??? My mantra…. Bloom Where You’re Planted!
Every place is special in its own way. There are things to see, do and eat. No… we may not have that perfect bagel but I can guarantee you didn’t have fluffy biscuits and hush puppies. You complain that it’s too hot to get out and do anything. That’s true. Embrace it. Why do you think we move slowly, enjoy a good rocker on a wide porch and drink copious amounts of sweet tea? We’ll get out and walk, ride bikes, go on long motorcycles rides when it’s cooler… about the time you are shoveling snow and hurrying to get inside where it’s warm.
Second, I have some advice for those new residents, before you begin to tell long-time residents how it was done better where you used to live – keep quiet. Live here at least a year before making any judgments and offering advice. Everyone can benefit from different views but if it was so great where you used to live, why didn’t you stay there?
I don’t even know what to say anymore because whatever I say… it doesn’t matter. You’re too busy running around finding things that aren’t like what you had wherever you came from. If you were nicer I might invite you to come sit with me on the porch, cook you a great meal and introduce you to a whole bunch of nice people. Instead, you’ll find others just like you and sit around at parties commiserating about how unhappy you all are. Then again…. That’s your choice but please do me a very small favor?.... just shut the hell up…. Bless your heart!
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