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We looked for a house for over a year and a half. About midway through this process we found a house in a really nice wooded neighborhood. However, my realtor kinda rushed us into putting in an offer (didn't use that realtor afterwards) and it made me a little mad. Our offer got accepted and then I got the HOA documents. Well I am not one who wants to live where people tell me what color I can paint my house, or what types of bushes and trees can be in my front yard and having to get approval for a playset for my kids in my backyard. The house needed a lot of work and the yard while big really lacked usable space because it was almost completely treed and fairly sloped (you can't remove trees without HOA permission).
My wife really liked the house. We went back for a second look and the pet odor was stiffling. The carpet was brand new which is a bad sign. House didn't feel as good, and so I talked my wife into letting it go. Which she agreed to do. Our realtor said we wouldn't find anything better at this price point. He was right.
So a year later we finally bought a house which is a design I don't like (split - entry), needs work and has traffic noise pretty bad in the back yard. So why would I do such a dumb thing. It really boiled down to my wife was tired of looking and she liked this house enough because it has space and over an acre of usable land. My kids lives were disrupted by constant house hunting. Our tiny home was so outgrown there was barely space to walk and toys were everywhere. However, now I hate my new home so much I don't even want to go paint the walls before we move in. I can't even open the windows cause I don't want to hear the traffic noise, and I feel ill every time I go.
All I can do right now is regret the one I screwed up. But it is too late and I am stuck. I have nothing but anger and regret at myself right now and I am ruining my families new home (they are all excited to move).
then I got the HOA documents.
Well I am not one who wants to live where people tell me what color I can paint my house, or...
In many parts of the country, the south especially, the local government has been unable to
pass the legislation needed to create effective zoning laws even in the cities.
Add to that the preponderance of annexation into the countryside and other issues about
developmentare just done differently... and have created an administrative and law vacuum
into which the HOA has inserted itself in order to get development done.
For the most part the longer term locals seem to like this.
If you don't, as I don't, be VERY careful where you buy.
Quote:
Our realtor said we wouldn't find anything better at this price point. He was right.
A year and a half is a long time to look for a house. I'm going to guess you're something of a perfectionist, and probably no house would be 100% "right" for you.
That being said, the house is yours. Time to make some changes to make it feel more suitable to your tastes. Do some painting or remodeling. Maybe if you feel like you have more control over your enviroment, it'll make the house feel more YOURS.
Also for traffic noise, get some fans or a white noise machine (like an air purifier). I live very close to a busy street and I keep my fan on year round. It really does help drown out the noise (plus I find the hum of the fan comforting).
What you do to get past it, is to deal with reality.
First reality-- you did not screw up. The first home would have driven you crazy with the rules and regulations. It wasn't suitable for you or for a family with children if you needed permission for playscapes, fences, etc. Walking away was an acceptable decision. Tons of people walk away from HOAs- you're not alone.
Second reality. You, like most people, don't have unlimited funds. You search and buy within your financial parameters. That will limit you to what is out there. In some markets it won't be much. If the pickings are slim, then you choose the best of what is available. This is the real world.
Third reality- you do not have to fix the house up right this minute. It's OK to live there for a year and get used to it . Then decide what to and when to do it. Unless you custom build new, every home will have flaws and things that need to be done. This is normal, typical and to be expected. It's not a big deal. This is not as reason to be upset.
Fourth reality. This is not forever. This is your first house. There will probably be others.
Fifth reality. It's not all about you. Your wife and kids are happy to move, it seems. Take heed of their enjoyment and go with it. For example, take your kids to the paint store. Let them choose colors for their rooms. Start looking at how you can do the yard to amuse the kids.
Look at what they're seeing--- you have a home, it has a big yard, there is space upstairs and downstairs, etc. You're in a better position than you were prior to buying.
Plant Leland Cypress trees along your back yard border . It will cut the noise and in a few years, any distance highway views.
PS- and most important- remember this - if momma ain't happy, then no one is happy. Thank your lucky stars your wife is thrilled. You made your wife happy and that is the best of all. You did OK , really you did.
A year and a half is a long time to look for a house. I'm going to guess you're something of a perfectionist, and probably no house would be 100% "right" for you.
I agree. That seems like a very long time to be looking for a house.
I think the OP should focus on making the property more likeable for himself and his family. Some people have already suggested ways to cut down on the traffic noise, etc. Get to it, OP. Look at the glass as being half full and not half empty.
I've lived near highways and railroad tracks. After awhile, I tuned out the noises and didn't even notice them anymore. Maybe you'll do the same.
Split entries are family friendly: the cozy family room downstairs contains family mess while the upstairs living room stays fairly neat and clean (and offers a retreat away from television noise). If you can open the kitchen to the DR/LR area, it's a great entertaining space.
What you do to get past it, is to deal with reality.
First reality-- you did not screw up. The first home would have driven you crazy with the rules and regulations. It wasn't suitable for you or for a family with children if you needed permission for playscapes, fences, etc. Walking away was an acceptable decision. Tons of people walk away from HOAs- you're not alone.
Second reality. You, like most people, don't have unlimited funds. You search and buy within your financial parameters. That will limit you to what is out there. In some markets it won't be much. If the pickings are slim, then you choose the best of what is available. This is the real world.
Third reality- you do not have to fix the house up right this minute. It's OK to live there for a year and get used to it . Then decide what to and when to do it. Unless you custom build new, every home will have flaws and things that need to be done. This is normal, typical and to be expected. It's not a big deal. This is not as reason to be upset.
Fourth reality. This is not forever. This is your first house. There will probably be others.
Fifth reality. It's not all about you. Your wife and kids are happy to move, it seems. Take heed of their enjoyment and go with it. For example, take your kids to the paint store. Let them choose colors for their rooms. Start looking at how you can do the yard to amuse the kids.
Look at what they're seeing--- you have a home, it has a big yard, there is space upstairs and downstairs, etc. You're in a better position than you were prior to buying.
Plant Leland Cypress trees along your back yard border . It will cut the noise and in a few years, any distance highway views.
PS- and most important- remember this - if momma ain't happy, then no one is happy. Thank your lucky stars your wife is thrilled. You made your wife happy and that is the best of all. You did OK , really you did.
Actually second home, but that is okay.
I feel like I overblew the HOA. Really... how often do people even hear from their HOA. Would I have ever? I am not so sure.
I think what really bothers me is my wife really really liked that first home and the area was really peaceful and the only reason we could buy that home is it needed a lot of work.
This home is also more than we could normally afford because it needs fixing up.
Traffic noise is really not inside. You can BARELY hear it during rush hour if the house is dead silent. With the windows open you can hear it just fine.
I guess at this age I expect to be in my forever home. Being 40 now I was hoping to be done moving.
So, does this belong in REAL ESTATE or METAL HEALTH ?
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