Why is it that the women throwing themselves at you are always the ones you're not that interested in? (attracted, younger)

[1bright_future]

Same question can be turned around for the women too.


Is it because you think you're in a higher league than you really are?

Or could it possibly be that the women in your league are holding back and waiting for you to make the first moves?

Will people generally only throw themselves at people that are in the higher league? And then be more cautious, and patient and let things flow naturally if in the same league?


And before I receive any bashing comments directed towards me, I do want to point out that I really don't believe in leagues myself. But I think most other people do. Especially women.

If there's a woman who is only pretty to me and sweet to me, I don't care what any other man thinks of her or ranks her.

But women are hundreds of times more socially concerned with societal status and have a need to brag to other women that they have a great man.


Thoughts?

[NotARedneck]

The answer is obvious.

The real question is why do women think its okay for women to do this but is unacceptable when men do it? Then they run down men who are not successful for not really trying!

[rlrl]

i am a 48 year old white male, avoidant personality, overweight, balding, underpaid for all my aggravation and stress (but i have a decent job with decent benefits), independent for almost 20 years, own car, and this woman at my job has been interested in me since 2004 with no let up. just because we had lunch together in the office 6 years ago made her think i somehow was interested.

here's why i am not interested and never have been:

shallow personality (histrionic drama queen)

never is honest or direct about her life, motivations, intentions, but expects me to be those about mine

has a daughter or son or both but is never clear about it

makes odd comments about my habits such as how i like to keep newspaper clippings on my bulletin boards about moral issues, claiming "people who cut out newspaper articles have criminal records"

i live in a section of our county/boro that has a reputation for being rich, but the sector i live in is just a white normal working class area(her nabe however is a warzone)

has temper explosions about things that do not have to do with the job

gab gab gab gab gab gab gab to no intelligible purpose

sees my withdrawal from others as being a "psychiatric problem"

is sexually provocative and although you might ask me why it offends me, i simply see it s a way to get things out of me and she is trailer trash for it

she does not radiate any sexuality to me at all even tho she might to an older male (she is my age)

she picks fights with the younger girls at my job for no real reason other than because she's in a bad mood

[mark303]

Being unavailable makes you a unattainable.

[rlrl]

what you just posted was what I was going to post, that people want what they can't have

in the case i posted above this moron thinks because i wear glasses and am balding, that i am the "thensitive type of male" and then when she tried to get over on me she found out I am not really that way at all, but she still for some reason has this strong wish that i am going to be things i am not and will not be

i don't see how a woman can want someone after 6 years when they have demonstrated repeatedly that they cannot and will not be the person she wants them to

[Yzette]

I don't throw myself at men, so I wouldn't have the foggiest idea why another woman would do it.

When I was unattached, I let the men come to me. Some caught my interest, others didn't. That's life.

Preemptive strikes:

1. Yes, my style is to let the men make the first move. Some women like to make the first move themselves. Some men prefer to let women make the first move. Whatever makes you feel comfortable.

2. No, the ones I was not interested in were not automatically branded "creeps." I just wasn't interested. Of course, there were real creeps in there, too, but usually it was just a matter of no common interests, no physical attraction, values that were too different, etc.

[MontanaGuy]

Why is it that the women throwing themselves at you are always the ones you're not that interested in?

Women don't throw themselves at me, they throw objects. Tomatoes, eggs, or rotten vegetables are the most common.

[DrinkMagaritas]

Useually the men that "throw themself at me" are eather 1. SCARY!!!! They are weird and I just get bad vibes from them. 2. Think that they are the hottest thing to walk this town and they can get whatever/whoever they want. 3. Pretend to be something they are not thinking I will like it. 4. Sometimes I am just not physically attracted to them and I just can't help it!!


I wish I wasn't so shy or I would ask men out myself. I think a lot of good guys go unnoticed because they are just as shy as I am.

[findinghope]

i am guessing that people think when you ignore them, that they have to do something to get your attention. also agree that people want what they cant have

[rlrl]

to me. I don't want to sound like a chauvinist, but to me, despite all the changes that have evolved over the decades, female sex drive is still different than males and i would find it hard to believe a woman was REALLY that horned out if she was blatant about her needs to me. I'm overweight, balding, and frankly tho not boring to myself, i speak so little why would she be interested? the way i see it, either i have a personality attribute(in my case I'm passive so she could boss me around) that she feels she cannot live without and cannot get from another man, or she thinks my aloofness means i have a lot of $$$ which is certainly not true at all. in other words, women who throw themselves at a man might just have an ulterior motive. i realize that all relationships involve a give and take whether it is seen as an ulterior motive or not, but i would be very uneasy about why a woman would be so eager to get it on so quickly.

i don't understand why this co-worker hasn't realized i'm not interested in her and why she hasn't pursued a man who is shallow, vain, opportunistic and self centered just like herself . it's like, leave alone, ya friggin gnat!!!