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So a new guy starts messaging me on Sunday and we have been talking through text this week. Met him on POF and he sent me this phone number Sunday and I was semi-interested. I didn't call or text him. I log into POF Monday and we chat again. This time I give him my phone #. We text that night and he brings up meeting. I told him once we actually talk on the phone we can plan something.
We text off and on Tuesday and Wednesday. Wednesday morning he texts and said he will definitely call me that night. We work completely differently hours and he works 2 jobs. He has like a 2-3 hour gap between when I get off and he goes to his other job. He texts when I get home and was like are you off. I said yes and then heard nothing else from him.
I texted him about 12:00 today and was just like hi hope your day and going well blah blah. He texts back and we chat for a few minutes. I know he's in btw classes. He asked why I didn't tell him something and I said I would have told you but you didn't call last night.
He said something like hmmmm that's messed up.
I just don't like wasting time not meeting people. Never said why he didn't call. Our conversations have been great but I just keep wondering why he doesn't call. I really haven't even wanted to go back on POF at all. I haven't been on there since Monday. My profile even said I'm okay with texting but like actually talking on the phone.
With that said, endless texting with someone you meet online without ever getting together in person is stupid and a waste of time.
This guy needs to sh%& or get off the commode. Tell him in your next text that he needs to make plans to meet you by this weekend at the latest; otherwise, he can log back into POF and find a new texting buddy, because you've got better things to do.
^ Pimpy isn't completely accurate.... depends on the man's age. I know guys like me in their 30ies still use a phone to make calls, lol.
I will not make plans via text.
I will call to make plans, as you can do it a hell of a lot faster that way than by trading endless texts.
What I won't do, however, is have "get to know you" conversations over the phone with a chick I've recently met. That's what in person is for.
FYI, I also try to avoid in-depth conversations via text with a new girl. I stick to mindless stuff about the weather, maybe trade a few pics (maybe send an "Anthony Weiner shot" or two if she's into that stuff), but nothing heavy.
Basically, there's nothing wrong with using technology to make easier the logistics of the dating game, but it should never be used to try and replace the fundamentals.
This guy doesn't realize that a) he's actually too busy to date (the most important thing), and b) he needs to call. If he doesn't get it, there's nothing you can do.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pimpy
What I won't do, however, is have "get to know you" conversations over the phone with a chick I've recently met. That's what in person is for.
If I did online dating I would be okay with this (provided we didn't do in-depth texting or emailing either), but most women are going to want to have a "get to know you" phone conversation before meeting in person.
^ Pimpy isn't completely accurate.... depends on the man's age. I know guys like me in their 30ies still use a phone to make calls, lol.
I will not make plans via text.
Agree with this to a point, but I've had older guys that loved to text, and younger guys that loved to talk on the phone. For me, the phone is the real deal If I'm not hearing your voice, we aren't having a real conversation that means anything.
If I did online dating I would be okay with this (provided we didn't do in-depth texting or emailing either), but most women are going to want to have a "get to know you" phone conversation before meeting in person.
I think the basic "get to know you" info should be disseminated in a series of 3-4 emails on the dating site, then any further getting to know each other should be done in person.
The phone should be used in the interim to trade a few mindless flirty texts and to make plans, but nothing more.
Like I said in my last post, technology shouldn't be used to replace the fundamentals of dating.
Oh my goodness! I feel so old. Back in the early 90s when I was dating, there was no stress over texting/not texting or calling/not calling. A guy phoned your house and left a message on your answering maching if you did not pick up. I also had to smile when I remembered that I used to have my little brother screen calls before the advent of caller I.D.
I hate talking on the phone. I do appreciate when a guy calls to make plans because it's easier to have a back and forth about what days work, where to go, and what time than trading texts, but I've never been one to chat on the phone for hours. Just because he's not a phone person doesn't mean you guys won't hit it off if you meet in person. Why don't you just say hey I'd really appreciate you giving me a call so we can make some plans and see if he makes the effort to call. He may not know how much value you place on phone conversations.
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