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So last week an acquaintance that I'd danced with on a Saturday evening messaged me on Sunday to invite me out for a week later and asked me to name a day. He explained that he had a lot of family coming in for the week and that's why we had to wait a week to go out.
I was thrilled but surprised b/c he hadn't really shown a lot of interest in me--was friendly and flirty but didn't really single me out that night. I said yes and said that I had plans for the next weekend (I did) but could we go on Tuesday evening. He said sure and that's the last I heard from him. Sent him my phone number a few days ago but no texts, no nothing.
Then, just to make matters more strange, his brother has been messaging me the past few days and asked me out on Saturday night for the same evening but I told him I was busy. I"m not really interested in dating his brother for one thing, and for another it would be pretty crass to have a date with both brothers! In the same week at that. So, no. Also, I don't really like last minute dates.
I dunno, first man not all that excited is the message I'm getting, and the thing with his brother also asking me out is just too weird. And then I'd have to drive a distance to even meet the man since I live out in the sticks. But because I live out in the sticks and 45 miles from the closest interesting town, I don't have many options.
So last week an acquaintance that I'd danced with on a Saturday evening messaged me on Sunday to invite me out for a week later and asked me to name a day. He explained that he had a lot of family coming in for the week and that's why we had to wait a week to go out.
I was thrilled but surprised b/c he hadn't really shown a lot of interest in me--was friendly and flirty but didn't really single me out that night. I said yes and said that I had plans for the next weekend (I did) but could we go on Tuesday evening. He said sure and that's the last I heard from him. Sent him my phone number a few days ago but no texts, no nothing.
Then, just to make matters more strange, his brother has been messaging me the past few days and asked me out on Saturday night for the same evening but I told him I was busy. I"m not really interested in dating his brother for one thing, and for another it would be pretty crass to have a date with both brothers! In the same week at that. So, no. Also, I don't really like last minute dates.
I dunno, first man not all that excited is the message I'm getting, and the thing with his brother also asking me out is just too weird. And then I'd have to drive a distance to even meet the man since I live out in the sticks. But because I live out in the sticks and 45 miles from the closest interesting town, I don't have many options.
What would you do, given the circumstances?
Yeah...two brothers is weird...how do you know the brother? Is it a weird competition thing? And the family that was stopping the one guy from going out doesn't affect the brother about going out?
But - do you really consider getting asked for a date on Saturday for the following Tuesday to be "last minute"?
Did you make definite plans, like when, where, etc. or just "Tuesday'?
Obviously you need to hear from him at least a few days regardless, before that for confirmation before just driving 45 miles.....or even 2 miles.
Or, you have to confirm with him .
Yeah...two brothers is weird...how do you know the brother? Is it a weird competition thing? And the family that was stopping the one guy from going out doesn't affect the brother about going out?
But - do you really consider getting asked for a date on Saturday for the following Tuesday to be "last minute"?
I know both of them from a dancing class that I don't even go to anymore but I saw them out dancing last Saturday over a week ago. On Sunday the first one asked me out for a week hence and we named a date but no other confirmation. He said he'd get back with me to firm up plans but hasn't yet.
I'm not sure how the family plans affected both brothers--the man who asked me out has 3 kids and 6 grandchildren so it may have been just them, but from what I can tell, they are quite a large family and get together for every birthday or other event so I'm guessing the brothers saw each other and communicated at least once during the week. Did the first one tell his brother about our date? Of that I have no idea.
The second brother invited me out for ice cream on Saturday for the same evening but I wasn't even a little bit tempted--I stayed home on Saturday after a women's retreat and didn't want to drive 45 miles one way for ice cream with a man I'm not even attracted to! Especially when I had already agreed to a date with his brother for Tuesday. It does seem as if it could be a weird competition thing btw--one of the reasons I'm not attracted to man #2 is because he is strange and much older than me and has a foot fetish. Brother #1 is handsome, easy to talk to, and close to my age.
So yes, I'm tempted to just call off the whole thing but will that make me a flake? What would I even say? As far as I can tell he's probably just forgotten about it and if that's the case I'll let it go but what if he calls or texts and wants to go? I do not want to get a rep as a flake, and yet I'm beginning to think that he is flaking.
His silence could be your answer. People that are interested will find a way to keep in touch. If you really like him and he contacts you at the last minute, you could give him the benefit of the doubt this time. However, if he continues to do it, I'd move on from him.
His silence could be your answer. People that are interested will find a way to keep in touch. If you really like him and he contacts you at the last minute, you could give him the benefit of the doubt this time. However, if he continues to do it, I'd move on from him.
He just contacted me and asked if I'd be willing to change the date to Wednesday. I haven't answered yet.
He just contacted me and asked if I'd be willing to change the date to Wednesday. I haven't answered yet.
Putting his weird brother aside, you could give him a chance and see how it goes with him. However, if he goes silent/non-responsive again, you'll know it's a pattern and not a fluke.
What you tell him is really based on how much you want to see him again.
Putting his weird brother aside, you could give him a chance and see how it goes with him. However, if he goes silent/non-responsive again, you'll know it's a pattern and not a fluke.
What you tell him is really based on how much you want to see him again.
This except for , he didn't 'go silent. He said he ( or she)was going to be tied up all week/weekend and it is just Monday.
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