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I am a 21 year old female who recently moved from Texas to Chicago for a failed relationship. I then met a new guy and have been dating him for a year coming this January. I do not enjoy Chicago culture and have been wanting to move to LA, (I lived there for a brief period when I was a teenager and miss it). I failed a semester in college here because of partying with him too much. He is a bonafied drug addict. I like to party a lot too but he has actually stolen drugs from me and used me for my money to get them convincing me i would have made profit from selling them to his friends and asking me to use my cash to buy large amounts when he would then snort all the profits while I slept.
I have lost a lot of money to him (and my own foolish things like designer shopping) but I am not broke, I have a trust with 20,000(Which id rather not touch) and a ballpark of 10,000 in savings. My mom also pays for a credit card that takes care of all my bills and food necessities. I want to move to LA to pursue fame. it has been my only real dream He acts like he loves me and doesn't want me to move and has never cheated on me but I don't think Im gaining anything from being with him. He is 28 yrs old and never had a job but works now for one of his friends at a brewery but isn't being paid bc his friend claims its "training" which he probably won't use. he won't apply at any other jobs and gets angry when I ask. I've applied at a ton of jobs for things live bartender and waitress but no callbacks bc i have no experience.
He currently live with me in a condo that my mother bough for me in cash (no mortgage) but I am feeling stuck with this property since its in my moms name and i can't rent it out bc of that. My mom says she will support me as long as I go to school but I honestly don't want to. My only true passion in life is celebrity. I read about them all day long buy what they buy dress like them, care a lot about my appearance and make collages with glamour themes, listen to songs about being famous etc. I also have some separate money Ive set aside to invest in a rhinoplasty even though everyone says I don't really never it, I want to improve my chances of my dreams coming true.I will never be happy in a normal career I will feel cheated, and I can't marry a guy who will never pull his weight financially but has deluded dreams about being rich later in life (doing what?!) all he has is a Poli Sci degree from a public university, which I also tried to pursue along with the only other academic things that interested me (Nutrition and Psychology) but those are worthless jobless degrees I don't want to waste my time on.
I want to capitalize on my youth and move now, but I don't now how to do it with this relationship and without my mom going irate being stuck with this property and most likely cutting me off from at least my credit card. BF tells me I have it easy and comfortable in Chicago if I just go to school like everyone else everything will be taken care of for me by my mom. But I'm honestly getting bored of that. Im hungry for more. Sitting at home dreaming about famous and then going out getting drunk doing drugs with the same old people is all there is to do here, and its with a bunch of nobodies with no glamour.
I want to do anything to be famous, including getting a sugar daddy set up in California before I move perhaps so I can have some income since I know I can't set up a job. My bf found out I was setting up dates with sugar daddies and really got upset (mind you I never actually cheated on him and didn't intend to) I can tell he loves me because he is a messed up person (got molested as a kid) but I was abused too and I don't pull the finical cheating stuff he pulls that he blames on his "addiction". He is a sensitive nice guy for most of the time who is thoughtful and and affectionate and will hunt all over the city for me when he doesn't hear from me for a a few hours and doesn't know where I am. I feel we have a lot in common and have similar interests in music literature and the same sense of humor and the like, which Im told can be VERY hard to find.
So Im curious should I dump a leach who I love and get along great with, a long with a comfortable lifestyle in Chicago to move and pursue my dreams? Everyday I wake up not happy with the first thought on my mind the same- Why am I not famous? along with Why am I still with him?
Please help, tell me what I should realistically do if you were in my shoes. TRy to empathize.
thanks.
Okay, honey. Where do I begin.
First, yes, you should dump a 28 year old boyfriend who doesn't have a job or a vision for himself. He's on drugs and he's a loser. Nothing you give him will change that. No sex, money or kind words will change what he is. He will have to do the work. You openly admit that he spends all his time partying and drugging--and stealing money from you, but you're not sure that you should dump him!?
Second, you say he doesn't have a clear vision for yourself, but do you? You say you want to be famous--famous doing what? modeling, acting, writing? What do you want to do? What are you good at? You say you like LA, but do you have any connections in LA? What are your job prospects? What marketable skills do you have? Can you take care of yourself once you come here?
Sugar daddy? You're actually willing to prostitute yourself when you come here in pursuit of fame? Is that practical!?
Third, your mom should already be irate with you. You're hanging around with (and screwing) losers, doing drugs and getting drunk! You're trying to make dates with strange men(which is dangerous, your liable to get killed)! You've got a silly dream of going to Cali and being some kind of star! Trust me. If I were a 21 year old college student today (25 now and out of college looking for work), I would kill to have it as good as you do. Parents who are putting you through college--who bought you a place to live--who love you and care about you. Instead, I worked and took out loans through school. I'm curious--exactly how do your parents feel about your dating this unemployed drug addict you go out and get high and drunk with?
My observation:
Dump this drug addict loser and stop hanging out with your drugy friends.
Get an education, get clean, grow up
Get on your knees and thank God you've got the life you do have instead of fantasizing about being famous
I am a 21 year old female who recently moved from Texas to Chicago for a failed relationship. I then met a new guy and have been dating him for a year coming this January. I do not enjoy Chicago culture and have been wanting to move to LA, (I lived there for a brief period when I was a teenager and miss it). I failed a semester in college here because of partying with him too much. He is a bonafied drug addict. I like to party a lot too but he has actually stolen drugs from me and used me for my money to get them convincing me i would have made profit from selling them to his friends and asking me to use my cash to buy large amounts when he would then snort all the profits while I slept.
I have lost a lot of money to him (and my own foolish things like designer shopping) but I am not broke, I have a trust with 20,000(Which id rather not touch) and a ballpark of 10,000 in savings. My mom also pays for a credit card that takes care of all my bills and food necessities. I want to move to LA to pursue fame. it has been my only real dream He acts like he loves me and doesn't want me to move and has never cheated on me but I don't think Im gaining anything from being with him. He is 28 yrs old and never had a job but works now for one of his friends at a brewery but isn't being paid bc his friend claims its "training" which he probably won't use. he won't apply at any other jobs and gets angry when I ask. I've applied at a ton of jobs for things live bartender and waitress but no callbacks bc i have no experience.
He currently live with me in a condo that my mother bough for me in cash (no mortgage) but I am feeling stuck with this property since its in my moms name and i can't rent it out bc of that. My mom says she will support me as long as I go to school but I honestly don't want to. My only true passion in life is celebrity. I read about them all day long buy what they buy dress like them, care a lot about my appearanceand make collages with glamour themes, listen to songs about being famous etc. I also have some separate money Ive set aside to invest in a rhinoplasty even though everyone says I don't really never it, I want to improve my chances of my dreams coming true.I will never be happy in a normal career I will feel cheated, and I can't marry a guy who will never pull his weight financially but has deluded dreams about being rich later in life (doing what?!) all he has is a Poli Sci degree from a public university, which I also tried to pursue along with the only other academic things that interested me (Nutrition and Psychology) but those are worthless jobless degrees I don't want to waste my time on.
I want to capitalize on my youth and move now, but I don't now how to do it with this relationship and without my mom going irate being stuck with this property and most likely cutting me off from at least my credit card. BF tells me I have it easy and comfortable in Chicago if I just go to school like everyone else everything will be taken care of for me by my mom. But I'm honestly getting bored of that. Im hungry for more. Sitting at home dreaming about famous and then going out getting drunk doing drugs with the same old people is all there is to do here, and its with a bunch of nobodies with no glamour.
I want to do anything to be famous, including getting a sugar daddy set up in California before I move perhaps so I can have some income since I know I can't set up a job. My bf found out I was setting up dates with sugar daddies and really got upset (mind you I never actually cheated on him and didn't intend to) I can tell he loves me because he is a messed up person (got molested as a kid) but I was abused too and I don't pull the finical cheating stuff he pulls that he blames on his "addiction". He is a sensitive nice guy for most of the time who is thoughtful and and affectionate and will hunt all over the city for me when he doesn't hear from me for a a few hours and doesn't know where I am. I feel we have a lot in common and have similar interests in music literature and the same sense of humor and the like, which Im told can be VERY hard to find.
So Im curious should I dump a leach who I love and get along great with, a long with a comfortable lifestyle in Chicago to move and pursue my dreams? Everyday I wake up not happy with the first thought on my mind the same- Why am I not famous? along with Why am I still with him?
Please help, tell me what I should realistically do if you were in my shoes. TRy to empathize.
thanks.
I think you should dump your demented view of life.
Money is a wonderful thing, everyone should be able to have as much as they like. But getting fame and fortune in the way you are describing will plague your life and erode your psyche.
You lived in LA when you were a teen? From one who has lived in LA and continues to visit on a regular basis, I would bet we will be seeing you pounding the pavement of Hollywood Blvd in your cheap stelletos all drugged up, trying to convince us that you are "somebody". Meanwhile your once respectable accounts are drained and your selling your body to get your next high. Stay on this path and you will be in for a very rude awakening.
I am a 21 year old female who recently moved from Texas to Chicago for a failed relationship. I then met a new guy and have been dating him for a year coming this January. I do not enjoy Chicago culture and have been wanting to move to LA, (I lived there for a brief period when I was a teenager and miss it). I failed a semester in college here because of partying with him too much. He is a bonafied drug addict.I like to party a lot too but he has actually stolen drugs from me and used me for my money to get them convincing me i would have made profit from selling them to his friends and asking me to use my cash to buy large amounts when he would then snort all the profits while I slept.
To be honest I had to stop where I highlighted.
Dump him quickly and don't look back, keep in mind this has been a lifestyle for you as well.
Where ever you go, you'll still be there. So, make whatever corrections you need now to make your future the best it can be.
OMG seriously. You are sooo naive and STUPID. You've been given too much in life too soon and you have no common sense. I'm not going to waste my time trying to help you. Good luck in life!
1) Timing: posted around Christmas, during which people have a lot of free time to fabricate stories
2) New member: alt?
3) Suspiciously eloquent and neat writing (complete sentences, perfect punctuation, logical structure, compelling story, some choice of words) for someone who dismisses education and is fairly young... The way she writes suggests that she is not as shallow and materialistic as she makes it sound.
1) Timing: posted around Christmas, during which people have a lot of free time to fabricate stories
2) New member: alt?
3) Suspiciously eloquent and neat writing (complete sentences, perfect punctuation, logical structure, compelling story, some choice of words) for someone who dismisses education and is fairly young... The way she writes suggests that she is not as shallow and materialistic as she makes it sound.
Addictions and drug use doesn't mean illiterate and stupid..
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