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Let's just take this example. You say you love your mother and then you say you hate her sometimes. During the times that you hate her, I am assuming you don't love her,because you can't experience or express two opposing feelings simultaneously. So what I imagine, from this example, is that your mom is important to you, you love her . . .but then she says or does something that pisses you off, so then you experience rage or hate towards her? Is that correct?
Still, it is not the phenomenon I am asking about which is actively disliking someone - not liking them at all, but claiming to love them . . .
Perhaps this is the problem right here. I am in no way insulting you, but perhaps YOU can not experience two-opposing feelings simultaneously. The people who are trying to explain this to you, clearly CAN ... simultaneously feel two opposing feelings. Perhaps that's why you don't understand the explanations....you DON'T experience this phenomenon.
As in my example: I love my brother because he is my brother, but I don't like him because he does things in his life I don't agree with as in being a financial strain on my parents. Get it now?
Perhaps this is the problem right here. I am in no way insulting you, but perhaps YOU can not experience two-opposing feelings simultaneously. The people who are trying to explain this to you, clearly CAN ... simultaneously feel two opposing feelings. Perhaps that's why you don't understand the explanations....you DON'T experience this phenomenon.
Who says that you have to experience them at the same time? Why cannot one be the driving force behind the other?
Who says that you have to experience them at the same time? Why cannot one be the driving force behind the other?
Ummmmm please actually read the post I was responding to. Take note of the "highlighted" phrase, which I directly addressed. Simultaneously, MEANS at the same time!
Ummmmm please actually read the post I was responding to. Take note of the "highlighted" phrase, which I directly addressed. Simultaneously, MEANS at the same time!
I have never understood what people mean when they say they love someone but don't like them. I think that this is just a sentiment that sounds good . . . but I am open to learning more about this dynamic and just EXACTLY what is meant by it.
If I don't like someone, I certainly don't love them . . . My theory is that there are people it is tabu to dislike and not love either, so someone came up with the lame sentiment "I love him but I don't like him."
Please show me the error of my thinking and explain EXACTLY what you mean about not liking someone but loving them.
It is a totally incongruent idea to me.
I use that expression to refer to family members because in the grand scheme of things, I love my family. I just don't like their weakness and character defects. Especially if they clash with mine!
What I mean is that this is an idiotic statement for a significant other to say to someone. If that is your thoughts it's time to break up or divorce.
Our OP has asked us not to discuss this on her thread as she considers it off topic.
Anyone posting here long enough who's been paying attention knows I'm absolutely head over heels in love with my husband. Just saying that some women do use that "idiotic" statement when they fall out of love with their husbands and break things off. Doesn't mean they don't love the man as a friend or father of their children. Let's go to dm if that's not clear enough for you
LOL...no problem, been know to make the same mistake a time or two myself.
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Perhaps that's why you don't understand the explanations....you DON'T experience this phenomenon. 
