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Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
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Just a thought; I find it odd that if you find happiness in making others happy--if it really fulfills you--you're a good person. Yet, if you find happiness in making your romantic partner happy, you're weak...clingy...you have no life....
I think the difference is in the plural. When you find happiness in making others happy, you are spreading your affection and care around. However, when it's focused on one person, there's a real risk for codependence.
That said, I don't know that it's healthy to put all your happiness on others either. I find great joy in helping others - but the act of service and advocacy is what gives me joy, not the reaction of those that I am helping. It's a fine line to walk.
Just a thought; I find it odd that if you find happiness in making others happy--if it really fulfills you--you're a good person. Yet, if you find happiness in making your romantic partner happy, you're weak...clingy...you have no life....
There are those that would take a kind soul as being weak, And may feel superior to that person as a result. it does not help in the fact that despite being so advanced as a society, We are growing further apart. Hide our feelings, Text instead of call, call instead of meet like we are digital hermits in a way. Also the way we communicate face to face in the dating world at times-There is no directness-Like if "He or she does this they really mean that." It can be daunting because you feel like too much attention you are a creepy stalker, And not enough you don't care. Not everyone who is a mature adult is (Thankfully) like this.
What can beat wandering through a small town in Quebec when fall colors are peaking, or what can beat finding a quiet cove in the Mediterranean in the summer?
The other thing is that, when you're not even planning it, you can run into really interesting and likable people when you're traveling.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,005,830 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by charolastra00
I think the difference is in the plural. When you find happiness in making others happy, you are spreading your affection and care around. However, when it's focused on one person, there's a real risk for codependence.
That said, I don't know that it's healthy to put all your happiness on others either. I find great joy in helping others - but the act of service and advocacy is what gives me joy, not the reaction of those that I am helping. It's a fine line to walk.
Those are the assumptions though; 1--that if you are the giving type, you're probably waiting for a reaction/thank you/recognition. The best reason to do it in secret whenever possible, and 2--that if you're that giving in your relationship, you have nothing else going on in your life but that one person. Ass/u/me. I never cared for the word.
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,005,830 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by D. Scott
There are those that would take a kind soul as being weak, And may feel superior to that person as a result. it does not help in the fact that despite being so advanced as a society, We are growing further apart. Hide our feelings, Text instead of call, call instead of meet like we are digital hermits in a way. Also the way we communicate face to face in the dating world at times-There is no directness-Like if "He or she does this they really mean that." It can be daunting because you feel like too much attention you are a creepy stalker, And not enough you don't care. Not everyone who is a mature adult is (Thankfully) like this.
Whyte Byrd I have never ever thought of this in that manner. Huh.
I am they type of person who DOES find happiness in making other people happy, smile, etc. I also find it in making my SO happy.
I have never thought of it as making me weak or clingy but now that you have brought it up, I suppose many people do look at it that way.
Poo to them, lol.
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