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Really, if there wasn't at least some truth to this "women aren't attracted to nice guys" theory, we wouldn't be discussing it so often. While I appreciate your campaign to change attitudes that "women want nice good guys", this "minority" opinion is not an urban myth.
I didn't say there wasn't some truth to it. But it's a minority of women. The way people fixate on that image and believe it represents all or most women is strange, and seems to be peculiar to this forum.
Onglet is talking about settling in terms of looks, status, and $. You are talking about settling in terms of character and compatibility. 2 different things. Nobody competes for character and compatibility, so it's not settling.
Not the way I read her posts at all. What post did she say looks and status. Mikala was talking about fulfilling her own sense of happiness. No one stated they were pining for a wealthy Adonis. Onglet dwells on a woman’s age being a restriction to dating and suggest women accept or settle for any man that would have them because once we move out of that 20-30 age range our ability to find a compatible mate dwindles fast as we head to the dreaded 40-50 premenopausal phase where no man wants to touch that.
I didn't say there wasn't some truth to it. But it's a minority of women. The way people fixate on that image and believe it represents all or most women is strange, and seems to be peculiar to this forum.
It seems to be a wide-ranging idea that guys on the internet like to repeat to each other along the lines of: women in their 20s only go for jerks and bad boys (and not awesome dudes like us,) but then when they get older and want to settle down (with awesome guys like us) they're all used up and damaged goods and awesome guys like us don't want them anymore. Take that, women. It feeds the whole "I'm a nice guy, why won't these stupid women date me? thing.
It seems to be a wide-ranging idea that guys on the internet like to repeat to each other along the lines of: women in their 20s only go for jerks and bad boys (and not awesome dudes like us,) but then when they get older and want to settle down (with awesome guys like us) they're all used up and awesome guys like us don't want them anymore. Take that, women.
Oh. Thanks for the insight. It's like we have to be anthropologists just to understand some of these male mentalities. I think for now, I'll chalk it up to an internet thing.
It seems to be a wide-ranging idea that guys on the internet like to repeat to each other along the lines of: women in their 20s only go for jerks and bad boys (and not awesome dudes like us,) but then when they get older and want to settle down (with awesome guys like us) they're all used up and damaged goods and awesome guys like us don't want them anymore. Take that, women. It feeds the whole "I'm a nice guy, why won't these stupid women date me? thing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Oh. Thanks for the insight. It's like we have to be anthropologists just to understand some of these male mentalities. I think for now, I'll chalk it up to an internet thing.
It might shock you to know this, but it's discussed among men in real life too.
The basic idea is that women are so picky (attitude, looks, wealth) that they will exhaust their options by their mid 30s or be mistreated and end up miserable. By then, they will be too unattractive to get a decent man anymore. And they will then come crawling back to the men they passed over.
It's not true though. Women in their 30s are still very attractive and can still get many men and still be picky. And there are rarely any lasting negative consequences of women dating bad boys and good looking guys. They'll usually find somebody they like just perfectly after that, tie the knot and have puppies.
You have a really sad outlook on life. Why should anyone not feel entitled to spend their life with a partner that is right for them. As a pre menopausal (and btw a man wouldn’t know if you were ovulating to save his soul) nearly 50 yr. old whose gone thru 2 divorces because I wasn’t willing to settle for a miserable life with a man that wasn’t right for me, Ill be darned if I will settle now. I would prefer to spend the rest of my life without a partner.
What is far worse are women who fear being without a man and will put up with crap and unhappiness because they are convinced they are worthless because of their age and pitiful because they don’t have a man, any man.
No one is entitled to anything. I am sorry to be the one to break it to you but, your mom and your grandma lied to you. There is nothing out there that is automatically due you, and it is highly possible that you will get nothing you want. You are entitled to nothing other than death. You aren't important enough to get the entitled position you seem to think is due you. Love? No. A great partner, or even a partner at all? No. Sorry, snowflake. I can go down a list of things to which you are not entitled, and at the end I will come to the same conclusion - you are only entitled to death.
Don't care that you think this is a sad outlook. I call it reality.
Not the way I read her posts at all. What post did she say looks and status. Mikala was talking about fulfilling her own sense of happiness. No one stated they were pining for a wealthy Adonis. Onglet dwells on a woman’s age being a restriction to dating and suggest women accept or settle for any man that would have them because once we move out of that 20-30 age range our ability to find a compatible mate dwindles fast as we head to the dreaded 40-50 premenopausal phase where no man wants to touch that.
I dwell on nothing here. The truth is, you dwell on a select number of my posts and read them to be whatever suits your inner narrative.
No one is entitled to anything. I am sorry to be the one to break it to you but, your mom and your grandma lied to you. There is nothing out there that is automatically due you, and it is highly possible that you will get nothing you want. You are entitled to nothing other than death. You aren't important enough to get the entitled position you seem to think is due you. Love? No. A great partner, or even a partner at all? No. Sorry, snowflake. I can go down a list of things to which you are not entitled, and at the end I will come to the same conclusion - you are only entitled to death.
Don't care that you think this is a sad outlook. I call it reality.
I agree, we really have to stop thinking we are entitled to anything, its not to say we cannot have anything, but to just expect it to land in our laps without work/luck..nope doesn't work that way, people who feel entitled to things are destined for disappointment.
No one is entitled to anything. I am sorry to be the one to break it to you but, your mom and your grandma lied to you. There is nothing out there that is automatically due you, and it is highly possible that you will get nothing you want. You are entitled to nothing other than death. You aren't important enough to get the entitled position you seem to think is due you. Love? No. A great partner, or even a partner at all? No. Sorry, snowflake. I can go down a list of things to which you are not entitled, and at the end I will come to the same conclusion - you are only entitled to death.
Don't care that you think this is a sad outlook. I call it reality.
First, don’t assume my mother or grandmother lied to me about anything. You are under the impression that women are told and believe they will be carried away by prince charming riding up on a white stallion to live happily ever after. You sound quite bitter and desperate actually, but a princess attitude is not what we are discussing here. Im well aware of the disappointments and struggles of life but I hold to my convictions that just because I will not remain 20 years old that I should stop embracing my expectations (which are not that great) and settle for something that is against my desires or repulsive to me because of my age. I may never find a soul mate or have the relationship I would like to but if I continue to date I will not settle for the sake of having a man. I am quite happy without one.
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