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It's not a matter of whether or not I like it. My point was that the OP asked a very specific question: why do young professional men with lucrative careers choose to marry young? You do not plan to marry and have not yet embarked on your career, so I'm not sure what you're looking for in this conversation other than validation of your choice, a choice you've now reiterated repeatedly. I hope you'll take my validation of that choice, along with other's, as permission to stop beating a dead horse. We get it.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by randomparent
It's not a matter of whether or not I like it. My point was that the OP asked a very specific question: why do young professional men with lucrative careers choose to marry young? You do not plan to marry and have not yet embarked on your career, so I'm not sure what you're looking for in this conversation other than validation of your choice, a choice you've now reiterated repeatedly. I hope you'll take my validation of that choice, along with other's, as permission to stop beating a dead horse. We get it.
Apparently you did not get my point. Here it is again. I'll even underline it for you.
Quote:
Well, I can speak from the standpoint of a early 20s guy with his whole life ahead of him which is what most young successful guys are.Early 20s guys. They and I feel this clash of cultures. One that says don't even think about settling down in your 20s since this is the one time in life where you have no one to answer to so go out and live it up another that says get married early so you can grow up. I gave my perspective as a guy who follows the former school of thought.
I can sort of understand why average guys get married in their 20s and 30s, but why do so many guys who are or will likely be highly successful (top law school students, med students, Wall Street guys, successful entrepreneurs, etc) marry in their 20s and 30s?
I understand if a guy wants to start a family one day, but wouldn't it be better to finish school, start making some serious money (6 figures), enjoy the bachelor life while making 6 figures for a good 10 years, THEN look to settle down around 40 to a woman who is around the age of 30? I'm just wondering because I know so many guys who worked very hard to put themselves in a great financial position, but got married/engaged prior to making excellent money and pretty much missed out on everything that comes with being a highly successful, single guy. I just don't understand why so many guys do this to themselves.
Can someone please explain this insanity?
The majority of women in today's world (I said majority, not each individual) go after what 'society' calls success. As you can see in this post you define success the way most of this blinded society defines it. Guys know this is how most women think and these 'successful' guys probably think to themselves I better take what I can get in case someday I do end up losing all I have worked for because at that point none of these ladies will be around to give 2 craps.
If they are truly successful, they have nothing to prove. They don't need to be constantly around hot women if they and everyone else know that they can get any girl they want.
I can sort of understand why average guys get married in their 20s and 30s, but why do so many guys who are or will likely be highly successful (top law school students, med students, Wall Street guys, successful entrepreneurs, etc) marry in their 20s and 30s?
I understand if a guy wants to start a family one day, but wouldn't it be better to finish school, start making some serious money (6 figures), enjoy the bachelor life while making 6 figures for a good 10 years, THEN look to settle down around 40 to a woman who is around the age of 30? I'm just wondering because I know so many guys who worked very hard to put themselves in a great financial position, but got married/engaged prior to making excellent money and pretty much missed out on everything that comes with being a highly successful, single guy. I just don't understand why so many guys do this to themselves.
Can someone please explain this insanity?
You know why these guys do it? It's because in American society being married is considered part of the process of being "successful."
In other words, getting married in addition to establishing a good career is part of the rites of passage that has been laid out in American culture.
Another serious issue that I have observed is that Western men have a hard time living alone. I have met numerous grown men who can't seem to function without a woman living with them.
Because perhaps they met women who knocked their socks off and they wanted to settle down and start a family.
Just because somebody knocks your socks of does not mean you should marry them.
Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle
Marriage isn't for everyone, obviously, but it's just odd to me that some of you interweb dudes can't fathom that not all guys want to play the field, or that they really enjoy the company of their girlfriends and wives.
It's not about "playing the field," it's about the having the freedom to do as you please along with taking up hobbies (i.e, learning a new language, traveling) that greatly aids in personal development. As a man, you simply can't do these these things when you're married.
Also, you're ***m right marriage is not for everyone! So why do so many women make a big deal that I'm NOT married? It's tiresome and somewhat offensive to have to explain my personal life over and over.
Last edited by calicali01; 06-02-2012 at 12:44 PM..
People who wait until their 40s to have children will be raising them until they're in their late 50s and 60s. Who wants to be raising teenagers that late in life when you can be a grandparent?
So true.
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