How long do past relationships affect you?

[dr74]

Originally Posted by burgler09

Wow! This is 100% exactly how I am. You're out with someone and go on a few dates and the next thing you see is this person being clingy and thinking "good god I'm not going to deal with this" or they tell a story about how they reacted and you think "blah, not this again".

Maybe you're right.. maybe it's just me being aware of what I do and don't want. Kind of like when you get out of a crappy relationship and look back and say "if I would have just acted on this flag right there, this would have all been avoided".

But you're right, your story was pretty much how I'm feeling to the dot.

lol..yup..the same rhetoric..sends your eyes rolling to the top of your head and the same words stating "here we go" it is all about recognizing the signs..
I do not do clingy well or possessive. Last time I looked? I was secure. and loyal..if you cannot see it? Then it is a personal problem and I do not have the time to continue validating you.

[D217]

I've always been able to bounce back rather easily.

I had 2 really messed up relationships back to back about 6yrs ago. One broke my heart, and the 2nd broke my spirit.

But afterwards, with what must have been the grace of God, lol, I started drawing some really nice guys to me from then on, which really helped restore my strength & sanity.


A few relationships will always affect me, from time to time, which I still think about on occasion. But I don't let them hold me back, because I know our experiences are what help shape the direction of our future.


I also believe our character is constantly tested w/ wack partners and random people we meet. Will we fall victim to them or stand firm in our convictions? When we know what we want, we refuse to accept that which we do not.

My boundaries were tested big time this year, which was a really huge lesson for me, and I definitely feel I've been rewarded for my bravery!

[TabulaRasa]

Less and less, the longer I am in my current one. We've been together for five years and counting, and details from my previous relationships, none of which were anywhere near as long or serious as my current one, continue to have less and less impact. I learned from those earlier relationships, but they're far enough in the past, and non-serious enough in scope that they aren't really in the same league as the relationship I've been in for the past five years.

[sun queen]

They can affect you forever!

[tegota]

It's not possible to have a relationship with an emotionally mature, and independant adult.