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Old 11-16-2012, 07:18 PM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,683 posts, read 42,389,499 times
Reputation: 11862

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I won't go into details...but I went on a date with this girl, and after the date I asked if she wanted to do it again and she said yes.

After that her mobile phone was unreachable, and she wouldn't respond to the one or two messages I sent via the dating site.

I assumed she just ditched me...do you think she should've had the guts to just say it, or would anyone even think this was the tactful approach?

Tbh the date didn't go PERFECTLY (it wasn't a disaster) and I wasn't too upset, but kind of annoyed that people can be so casually dishonest.

Have you had this happen to you or done this to anybody?
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Old 11-16-2012, 07:37 PM
 
Location: Podunk, Cackalacky
300 posts, read 539,263 times
Reputation: 345
I've never done that exactly, but once I met up with a guy for a language exchange and afterward he sent me an email saying I was cute and so on. I agreed to meet up for another language session, but then I didn't answer when he called later. I wasn't attracted to him, so it would have been awkward. If I were in the situation again, I'd reply and say no thanks. I passed him in the street once, and he looked embarrassed. I still feed bad about it.
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Old 11-16-2012, 07:38 PM
 
Location: New Jersey
8,738 posts, read 9,438,436 times
Reputation: 7491
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
I won't go into details...but I went on a date with this girl, and after the date I asked if she wanted to do it again and she said yes.

After that her mobile phone was unreachable, and she wouldn't respond to the one or two messages I sent via the dating site.

I assumed she just ditched me...do you think she should've had the guts to just say it, or would anyone even think this was the tactful approach?

Tbh the date didn't go PERFECTLY (it wasn't a disaster) and I wasn't too upset, but kind of annoyed that people can be so casually dishonest.

Have you had this happen to you or done this to anybody?

She probably said yes to your face because she didn't want to say no and insult you/embarrass both of you....so she probably should've said yes -- then answered your messages and told you no thanks properly. I don't see anything wrong with that approach but as usual, what do I know.
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Old 11-16-2012, 07:39 PM
 
Location: Viña del Mar, Chile
16,416 posts, read 24,838,714 times
Reputation: 16438
Of course I have, quite a few actually. I've done the same thing to girls. It happens, it was never anything that kept me up. Although one night I did get wasted and text a few lol



No you should absolutely not contact this girl again. It's over
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Old 11-16-2012, 07:41 PM
 
Location: Podunk, Cackalacky
300 posts, read 539,263 times
Reputation: 345
Just curious, if a girl didn't want a second date with you, would you want her to say "no" to your face?
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Old 11-16-2012, 07:48 PM
 
23,772 posts, read 30,658,558 times
Reputation: 28259
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
I won't go into details...but I went on a date with this girl, and after the date I asked if she wanted to do it again and she said yes.

After that her mobile phone was unreachable, and she wouldn't respond to the one or two messages I sent via the dating site.

I assumed she just ditched me...do you think she should've had the guts to just say it, or would anyone even think this was the tactful approach?

Tbh the date didn't go PERFECTLY (it wasn't a disaster) and I wasn't too upset, but kind of annoyed that people can be so casually dishonest.

Have you had this happen to you or done this to anybody?
I've never done it, and never had it done to me, but I know plenty of people that have done it. She didn't want to deal with the discomfort of saying no to your face. Chicken way out, but plenty of people take that path.
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Old 11-16-2012, 07:48 PM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,683 posts, read 42,389,499 times
Reputation: 11862
^ Both good points, I suppose. But it was a definite 'yes', not a maybe...I COULD tell by her body language she wasn't enthusiastic. Actually i wasn't too hopeful about a second meeting myself. Either way, it might not have made much difference.
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Old 11-16-2012, 07:49 PM
 
634 posts, read 566,116 times
Reputation: 394
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
I won't go into details...but I went on a date with this girl, and after the date I asked if she wanted to do it again and she said yes.

After that her mobile phone was unreachable, and she wouldn't respond to the one or two messages I sent via the dating site.

I assumed she just ditched me...do you think she should've had the guts to just say it, or would anyone even think this was the tactful approach?

Tbh the date didn't go PERFECTLY (it wasn't a disaster) and I wasn't too upset, but kind of annoyed that people can be so casually dishonest.

Have you had this happen to you or done this to anybody?

dude if you will get hurt coz of douchebag people better stay away from online dating for good. unfortunately that's a major part of online dating. yes i've had those done to me bajillion times but i dont fret over it. i mean are u the type that clings/attach to someone u just met for a span of,,,,,,,,,,,,, wait for it....................... 2 whooping hrs?!!. i mean come on. just shake it off and prowl on the next future ex gf. loooooooooool.

such is online dating life... deal with it or quit it.
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Old 11-16-2012, 07:55 PM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,683 posts, read 42,389,499 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by angelinajolie View Post
dude if you will get hurt coz of douchebag people better stay away from online dating for good. unfortunately that's a major part of online dating. yes i've had those done to me bajillion times but i dont fret over it. i mean are u the type that clings/attach to someone u just met for a span of,,,,,,,,,,,,, wait for it....................... 2 whooping hrs?!!. i mean come on. just shake it off and prowl on the next future ex gf. loooooooooool.

such is online dating life... deal with it or quit it.
Yeah I wasn't upset. There wasn't much chemistry. Just a little cynical about people's casual dishonesty, but hey, I can't talk too much it's not like I've NEVER done something similar. I'd probably have said something like 'maybe I'll think about it' but that's just as weak when you think about it.

Just wondering how commonplace this is. I guess the answer is very.
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Old 11-16-2012, 10:06 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,126 posts, read 25,472,323 times
Reputation: 16198
That's happened to me on basically every online date I've ever had. Very few times it's made it to date 2, but after that they just disappear or make excuses. I don't think I've ever made it to date 3 With a few of the guys I thought we had great chemistry and one of the dates ended up lasting nearly 6 hours and he kept making up more things for us to do...started with drinks, then dinner, then a movie, then walking around downtown etc. and then after that, one or two text messages and then nothing.

It happens, I try not to take it personally.
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