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Your friend wasn't trying to break you up as much as he was trying to warn you, sounds like. Once he realized she would be willing to do what she did he probably started thinking of her as a "random skank" and not a real girlfriend. He's still a jerk though.
Maybe she was trying to get you back for cheating on her. Who knows. What you did was pretty bad. But tracking down someone's friend to cheat with is pretty cruel. Even if she "didn't mean" to do it, all that means is she's incredibly passive aggressive.
I don't think either of you are ready for something serious.
Now, for the tricky part. We have been together for 10 months. 3 months into our relationship I did the same thing my girlfriend recently came out doing. This mistake was made with a random girl I had met via the internet. I remember apologizing profusely and telling her she should leave me, because I did not deserve her. Relucantly she chose to forgive me and move on.
It has been over 6 months since I cheated on her, but since she forgave me and we moved on I felt like everything really worked. The love felt real, things seemed to be going really well. I understand no one is perfect, I want to believe I can forgive her and move on, and maybe it will only be this once. Any hope for saying it was a bad judgment call, an act of the moment out of pure lust and that she really values her feelings for me now?
I have been faithful to her ever since my first act...maybe she could do the same and we could both evolve and move on?
It has been over 6 months since I cheated on her, but since she forgave me and we moved on I felt like everything really worked. The love felt real, things seemed to be going really well. I understand no one is perfect, I want to believe I can forgive her and move on, and maybe it will only be this once. Any hope for saying it was a bad judgment call, an act of the moment out of pure lust and that she really values her feelings for me now?
I have been faithful to her ever since my first act...maybe she could do the same and we could both evolve and move on?
It's bad enough when these things happen in a normal relationship but throw in long distance issues and really, it's doomed. Neither of you are ready for commitment as both of you managed to cyber cheat so quickly, all within a mere 10 month period when normal people are on their very best behaviour.
Dump her and go find a better woman. She doesn't have any respect for you and would you really want to spend the rest of your life with a woman who did something like to you?
My long distance girlfriend I recently found out has send a nude picture and has been having "cyber sex" via skype with one of my best friends. My girlfriend and I pretty serious, and we have big plans for the future that we talk about often. Two weeks after the first incident my best friend approached me and told me I need to rethink my situation with my girlfriend, saying he doesn't think she's serious about the relationship and only didn't want to be alone, not particularly be with me.
When I confronted my girlfriend about this, she said there is more to the story, and she brought my best friend over for a 3 way call via Skype. I asked my friend about this many times before he relucantly decided to join the call. Every time I asked him he claimed he had no idea what she was talking about and wrote her off as being crazy. Only when she came out and said what had happened did he admit to it as well. This is when she came forward with the information that they had been sexting via skype and she had sent him one nude image. They had done it 3 times, and she claims she felt guilty and had been trying to work up the courage to tell me for two weeks. There was nothing physical about it, since they live great distances apart, but it's cheating all the same.My girlfriend and I are deeply in love, I believe she loves me, and I know I love her.
Now, for the tricky part. We have been together for 10 months. 3 months into our relationship I did the same thing my girlfriend recently came out doing. This mistake was made with a random girl I had met via the internet. I remember apologizing profusely and telling her she should leave me, because I did not deserve her. Relucantly she chose to forgive me and move on. I considered that a turning point though, because from that moment on I realized how much I did love this girl and I began to care for her much more deeply than I ever had before.
What bothers me most was that this act of cheating came at what was one of the strongest points in our relationship, 10 months into the game when we are discussing the possibility of marriage in the near future, and it was with my best friend, someone I see on a daily basis.
We've both made mistakes now, part of me wonders how serious we are about actually being with each other. Makes me wonder if we are actually ready. I feel since she took me back the first time, I kind of owe it to her to accept her back after this. And although it was cheating, there was no actual kissing, no physical sex involved. For the record, my best friend and I are no longer on speaking terms, for the moment I've stayed on with my girlfriend but told her she is no longer to speak with him, which she has agreed to.
Any ideas or advice on what to do in this situation? All comments and criticism are appreciated, I'm just really confused as to what I should do.
Frankly, trying to maintain monogamy in a long-distance relationship is all but impossible. Heck, it is hard enough when two people are near each other. If you want a long distance relationship to work, you both need to be the type of people who can turn a blind eye. Otherwise, don't do it.
This relationship seems weird enough to withstand this blow.
I agree, right now it's 1 to 1. OP why don't you go visit her or make arrangements for her to come visit you. Especially if she comes to visit you, give her another chance. Lose that so-called friend though, he didn't own up to it and lied about it...2 offenses.
I believe everyone gets a second chance. But only ONE second chance.
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