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Drama. I knew this completely dysfunctional couple. She was always going on and on about how terrible her marriage was...so, I would give her suggestions, like...leave..."Yes, BUT.....". She always had some wort of reason why NOTHING would work.
Whatever. Don't give advice. Tell people to call a therapist and get psychotherapy.
No one really wants to acknowledge their dysfunction. Or acknowledge that you can't change the other person in the relationship, you can only change yourself.
Smart men learn that usually women don't really want advice or a solution. They just want someone to talk to.
Yeah - well, I don't enjoy talking to someone for an hour at 2am only to have them go out and do what they said they weren't going to do and then call me again the next day to cry some more. I mean - I was still there for her but I told her I was mad at her. If you know the fire is going to burn you - don't stick your hand in it! If you do - you only have yourself to blame.
Of course lots of people take romantic advice. Lots of people are morons who can't run their own lives, my good friend is one, I basically run his life for the most part like Hank does Bill on King of the Hill. I don't take any advice from here, don't need any
Smart men learn that usually women don't really want advice or a solution. They just want someone to talk to.
Yeah...which is weird to me. To me, it's like, why even talk unless it has a point? It's like people talk for the sake of talking, which can be annoying.
Smart men learn that usually women don't really want advice or a solution. They just want someone to talk to.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dub dub II
Yeah...which is weird to me. To me, it's like, why even talk unless it has a point? It's like people talk for the sake of talking, which can be annoying.
Sometimes venting or just talking through things clears your head - and you are able to see the situation better. Sometimes you just need an ear to bounce things off of while you figure out what you want or need to do. It's kind of like working out a math problem - sometimes you can't just do it in your head - you need to say it aloud or write it down to be able to really see it. Same goes for emotional problems.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rakin
You're a whole lot nicer than us guys. We'd said.. Dude it's 2am and I'm in bed. Call me in the morning and I'll come get you out of jail.
I've never asked for relationship advice, it's pointless. It isn't advice (as in it's about your best interests) is an airing of their opinion. "If I was you" means exactly that.
Yeah...which is weird to me. To me, it's like, why even talk unless it has a point? It's like people talk for the sake of talking, which can be annoying.
I am a woman and I share your opinion. If you come to me with a problem, it's implied (at least to me) that you want me to help you fix it. I don't go to other people with my problems unless I want them to fix it.
HOWEVER, most women are NOT like this...they feel close and connected and reassured when they are able to vent their frustrations. And because YOU CARE about the women in your life (friends, significant others, relatives), you listen on THEIR terms and stop bellyaching about how 'pointless' the conversation is.
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