Most young women (age 18-25)... never upfront, flakey, don't know what they want. (dating, younger)
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Not sure what the age demographic here is, probably older... but here goes.
I'm 20, pretty decent looking guy, work out, go to college, have a job. But I swear, sometimes I feel like I'm not good enough. Why? It just seems like I can be talking to a girl, going out, things could be going well, but then any moment, she can just randomly stop responding and I never talk to her again. This has happened countless times, and no, I don't come on too strong, don't come off as too clingy.
Most recent experience, I've been talking to this girl a year younger than I over my Christmas break who I used to work with. We hung out once (mostly just talked/hung out at my place, and I didn't do anything/make any move... I mean it is only our first time actually hanging out just the two of us, don't wanna take it too fast), she shows me some signs of being interested (calls me names like 'cupcake', tells me how she told her friends/family about me) but we plan 2 days ago to hang out today... I mention it an hour before we are supposed to hang out, she says she completely forgot, and she'll see if she still can. Kind of frustrated, I just say "ah, okay" and nearly 10 hours later, no response from her.
So that's that with that girl, most likely. Probably will end up not talking to her again, I mean what can I do? I don't wanna flip out on her or bug her any more, apparently if she forgot she wasn't really as interested, even though she made it seem so before. It really makes me feel that girls talk to numerous guys, and I'm sure I'm not the only one she's talking to at any given moment. Makes me think the competition is tough, and I may be a good candidate, but maybe she's talking to another dude who's richer, or better looking. For all I know, this girl could be hanging out with some dude right now.
To sum it all up, I feel a lot of it comes down to the girl, how she's feeling, and I feel a lot of younger women (age 18-25) just tend to go with their emotions, change their minds so quickly. Thoughts?
Not sure what the age demographic here is, probably older... but here goes.
I'm 20, pretty decent looking guy, work out, go to college, have a job. But I swear, sometimes I feel like I'm not good enough. Why? It just seems like I can be talking to a girl, going out, things could be going well, but then any moment, she can just randomly stop responding and I never talk to her again. This has happened countless times, and no, I don't come on too strong, don't come off as too clingy.
Most recent experience, I've been talking to this girl a year younger than I over my Christmas break who I used to work with. We hung out once (mostly just talked/hung out at my place, and I didn't do anything/make any move... I mean it is only our first time actually hanging out just the two of us, don't wanna take it too fast), she shows me some signs of being interested (calls me names like 'cupcake', tells me how she told her friends/family about me) but we plan 2 days ago to hang out today... I mention it an hour before we are supposed to hang out, she says she completely forgot, and she'll see if she still can. Kind of frustrated, I just say "ah, okay" and nearly 10 hours later, no response from her.
So that's that with that girl, most likely. Probably will end up not talking to her again, I mean what can I do? I don't wanna flip out on her or bug her any more, apparently if she forgot she wasn't really as interested, even though she made it seem so before. It really makes me feel that girls talk to numerous guys, and I'm sure I'm not the only one she's talking to at any given moment. Makes me think the competition is tough, and I may be a good candidate, but maybe she's talking to another dude who's richer, or better looking. For all I know, this girl could be hanging out with some dude right now.
To sum it all up, I feel a lot of it comes down to the girl, how she's feeling, and I feel a lot of younger women (age 18-25) just tend to go with their emotions, change their minds so quickly. Thoughts?
You're correct that there are flaky women between 18-25 years of age. That said, please be careful not to attribute the (apparent) flakiness just to them being flaky. In many cases, flakiness is an indirect (but not-so-subtle) way of showing lack-of-interest.
I know this from first-hand experience. The age of the girl doesn't matter. If she wants you in her life, she will make herself available to you. If she really cannot see you, she'll offer a different time and stick to it. If a girl is flaky on a regular basis, it's her way of saying that she's not interested and that you should back off.
Yeah most girls, and guys, at that age have no idea what they want. They may claim they do but most don't. Good news is as we get older that picture becomes more clear.
1) Act like a "flaky" 18-25 y.o. male yourself
2) Get some raincoats at the pharmacy
3) Invest physically, not emotionally
People should expect to get back what they give out, so get out of it what you can.
Not even sure what all you mean by this. And yeah, I realize most people our age don't know what they want, heck I don't know exactly what I want, if I had to answer, I would say I want to date some girls for experience and just see how it goes. And I'm not trashing women here btw, I understand their complaints about men too. But (and i'm sure this a topic that has been discussed on these boards in length...) sometimes it seems easier for them, as they have all these options, whereas it's a bit tougher for guys. I have been complimented by many girls for my looks, personality, and I can approach girls, get numbers, but from there, it can be kinda difficult, and can be like the roll of a die.
To LIS123, true, very true, but it gets discouraging when they show prior interest. It just seems like prior interest doesn't matter, it's all about how they feel now.
I'm no longer 18-25 anymore, but when I was, I had a good head on my shoulders, was considerate to people, treated them how I'd like to be treated, etc., etc., etc. I was not flouncy, etc. If I had met a guy like you back when I was that age, I'm sure I would have kept & appreciated you & we would have dated for a long time...& who knows, it may have ended up leading to marriage. I don't care if it's the year 2050, I'm a gal who still appreciates a guy opening my doors, pulling out chairs, pumping my gas at the gas station, taking off coats, etc.
You sound like a good guy. I hope your personality & character is modest, humble & respectable too. A lot of guys can work out, have a good job, & be good looking, but personality & how they are inside counts a whole lot more. A buff, musclehead does nothing for me if he's notkind & treats me like a queen. I used to think that it's so hard finding a good guy, but I guess it's just as hard to find a good girl out there too. I'm one of the very few.
I sure hope you meet a goo girl, not a flouncy, gold-digger, etc., who will appreciate you & the two of you compliemnt each other & treat each other well.
Good lord. Stop with the "talking" and "hanging out." It is so B O R I N G and passive.
Do something. Invite her to see some live music. Cook her a meal. Take her to an interesting play. Go rock climbing.
Show her you are a man of action and imagination and not a basement dwelling no-life. God knows there are too many of those these days.
I mean maybe this would make a difference, but when the girl I mentioned was telling me about her ex... lol. There is no way he did any of that, and he pretty much is a basement dwelling no-life, yet he was good enough for her to date him apparently. I'll be damned if it turns out she got back with him, she was totally trashing him to me and saying she is never getting back with him... but you never know.
I mean maybe this would make a difference, but when the girl I mentioned was telling me about her ex... lol. There is no way he did any of that, and he pretty much is a basement dwelling no-life, yet he was good enough for her to date him apparently. I'll be damned if it turns out she got back with him, she was totally trashing him to me and saying she is never getting back with him... but you never know.
In that case it doesn't sound like she would be worth dating...why would you want to date someone who goes out with those types?
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