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As long as we are identifying traits of poor partners.
In this case, you have to trust your gut. If there is something vaguely unsettling about him, listen to your doubts and tread cautiously.
For the past 3-4 months I have been meeting up with an old friend every couple of weeks (actually he was my on/off HS boyfriend). We would get together in a bar in a city that was equidistant between us to watch the Ravens play on TV. It was about an hour and a half drive for each of us.
Because he was at the tail end of his divorce proceedings, and I wasn't too sure how I felt about him (gut) I was keeping it friendly, though it was obvious he wanted to sleep with me. I was giving it time though, enjoying his company and I thought he enjoyed mine. Just seeing how things developed. I had not ruled anything out.
So last weekend, the playoff, we had arranged to meet, and he had gotten separate hotel rooms for us so we wouldn't have to drive home. On that morning I got a very important assignment from a client I had to turn around, so I told him I might be a little late. I finished up by 5 and told him I was leaving then and would meet him at the bar.
Because of traffic I arrived about 10 minutes late, just as he was storming out of the bar. He shoved the hotel key card in my hand, got in his car and roared off, tires squealing!
Later he texted me that he didn't want to waste his time on friends who treated him as an afterthought.
My response was, "wow, ok then." And that was that.
It was then that I remembered how he was in high school. More than once he stormed off, leaving me stranded at various locations and I would have to call a friend or parent to come and get me. Being a dumb young girl with an undeveloped gut I would always end up apologizing and asking for another chance.
To me, a man with a short fuse and a tendency to act out and tantrum is just about the worst thing I can imagine being saddled with. And there sure are a lot of them out there my age!
Most jerks have usually been jerks for a long time.
That guy has been jerking you around since HS, and has been getting away with it.
I can't only speak for myself, but I swear I must have matured at a really young age since I've never treated anyone like a piece of crap, even when that person may have deserved it I rarely did this, if at all.
Might be a reason why I have a bunch of friends and acquaintances, but I won't keep friends who spend there pay checks on drugs like a lot of people I've met in this town.
But, there's people can just get away with being a jerk and not suffering any consequences.
Most jerks have usually been jerks for a long time.
That guy has been jerking you around since HS, and has been getting away with it.
Well to be fair, I saw almost nothing of him from high school to just a couple of years ago. I have a terrible memory--so I am pretty sure my gut remembered more about him than my head did. But when he was driving off, I saw the expression on his face and flashed back to several over incidents from 30 years ago. All these memories came back like it was yesterday.
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But, there's people can just get away with being a jerk and not suffering any consequences.
I don't know about that. In this jerk's case, I am sure he is feeling embarrassed and regretful. At his age and circumstances (divorced, broke, underemployed, parents gone, few friends left) he doesn't have many bridges left to burn.
I think he expected me to go after him and comfort him and make him feel like a man. But that's not who I am anymore. I changed and he didn't.
People who can't change and improve themselves are going to suffer consequences. I know you get that Frog.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,723,992 times
Reputation: 41376
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prince_Frog
Most jerks have usually been jerks for a long time.
That guy has been jerking you around since HS, and has been getting away with it.
I can't only speak for myself, but I swear I must have matured at a really young age since I've never treated anyone like a piece of crap, even when that person may have deserved it I rarely did this, if at all.
Might be a reason why I have a bunch of friends and acquaintances, but I won't keep friends who spend there pay checks on drugs like a lot of people I've met in this town.
But, there's people can just get away with being a jerk and not suffering any consequences.
Unfortunately, some of them are also parents. My friend has a situation with the mother of his child. (I won't even use the classless baby mama term even though this woman has no class) She is a tool, she is not a good mother, she just yesterday picked the child's birthday to start some mess with my friend. He shows he is a good man by not letting it get to him.
I think grade A jerks will always get what is coming to them. May be one day on Earth in public view, may be one day between them and God Almighty.
I think you were more right when you were younger. A real man does get pissed at times, it just comes with the territory
And stop using your "gut", you're doomed to fail at life if you do that. Use your damned rational faculties. Your "gut" is all evolution based from 20,000 years ago, telling you you should sleep with the strongest man with the most testosterone, but staying with the man with the most money. Neither thing leads to happiness in a modern world, unless you're dumb/shallow with no personality.
I think you were more right when you were younger. A real man does get pissed at times, it just comes with the territory
And stop using your "gut", you're doomed to fail at life if you do that. Use your damned rational faculties. Your "gut" is all evolution based from 20,000 years ago, telling you you should sleep with the strongest man with the most testosterone, but staying with the man with the most money. Neither thing leads to happiness in a modern world, unless you're dumb/shallow with no personality.
Awesome post haha, I mean anyone can get mad about anything...
I have seen women get mad and throw temper tantrums like little girls. Men that do the same thing are like little boys, people are people, it happens in both genders. Get over it.
I think you were more right when you were younger. A real man does get pissed at times, it just comes with the territory
And stop using your "gut", you're doomed to fail at life if you do that. Use your damned rational faculties. Your "gut" is all evolution based from 20,000 years ago, telling you you should sleep with the strongest man with the most testosterone, but staying with the man with the most money. Neither thing leads to happiness in a modern world, unless you're dumb/shallow with no personality.
That's absurd. The gut never lies. More women should listen to theirs. It could prevent a lot of assaults, abuse, and misery. When the gut tells you something is off about someone, always listen to it. Always.
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