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So, while I know this may be just me, on several occasions I see men "kissing" woman's (or women) behind, men who are always trying to please a woman ("oh, yes, honey, you are right, I guess I didn't see it that way"), wives who "wear the pants" in their marriage, women who call certain men "momma's boys", "spineless", "not a man", neutered, owned, etc. In general, I guess I see this as another version of the nice guy prototype.
Anyway, while I know some of these traits are good for friendship, companionship, and keeping the peace with the opposite sex, do women really seek these type of guys for a long term relationship? In other words, when you are seriously considering a guy for an emotional and intimate relationship (ONS, bf, husband), at what point does it become a deal breaker, not attractive? Can you share any experiences?
The reason I ask is because some guys just dont fully appreciate a woman's perspective on this subject. And obviously, I can see how the opposite (jerks) prototype aren't desired mates either. But inquiring minds want to know....
Last edited by Dr. Clean; 02-16-2013 at 08:52 AM..
It always baffles me when an OP describes some terrible behavior and then expects people to defend it. I don't think anybody is going to say she likes weak, spineless mama's boys as you describe them.
And, too, a man who sometimes defers to his wife or admits that he's wrong isn't necessarily emasculated.
Obviously, you are correct when it comes to differences of opinions where someone corrects themselves after recognizing another perspective with merit. And I have no problem doing it, and do it regularly. I guess it's a question of nuance or subtlety that I perhaps didn't articulate well....
In that regard, I wish others focus on the legitimate aspect of my question instead of asserting bad motive in presenting the question. Don't you think guys could use some help in understanding this area???
Last edited by Dr. Clean; 02-16-2013 at 09:13 AM..
A bit of a straw man position don't you think? Just because you've seen it a few times doesn't mean it's normal or even prevalent.
I don't think I would call it common or rare for that matter, but it occurs with some regularity such that it's noticeable, at least to me. But if you read my original post, the question really is at what point does it unattractive?
So, while I know this may be just me, on several occasions I see men "kissing" woman's (or women) behind, men who are always trying to please a woman ("oh, yes, honey, you are right, I guess I didn't see it that way"), wives who "wear the pants" in their marriage, women who call certain men "momma's boys", "spineless", "not a man", neutered, owned, etc. In general, I guess I see this as another version of the nice guy prototype.
Anyway, while I know some of these traits are good for friendship, companionship, and keeping the peace with the opposite sex, do women really seek these type of guys for a long term relationship? In other words, when you are seriously considering a guy for an emotional and intimate relationship (ONS, bf, husband), at what point does it become a deal breaker, not attractive? Can you share any experiences?
The reason I ask is because some guys just dont fully appreciate a woman's perspective on this subject. And obviously, I can see how the opposite (jerks) prototype aren't desired mates either. But inquiring minds want to know....
1. Just for the record, momma's boys tend to kiss their momma's behind (usually sagging, big behind) They will never cut apron string and will always choose their momma over their wives. They are the least desirable in the dating world.
2. momma's boy is an automatic deal beaker. Period.
In general, women want a good man, not just a nice guy. Women will not respect a man without principles. However, MOST women want to be respected, pampered, loved, and cherished in a relationship. They also want somebody they can look up to, whom she can share inner feelings with.
Yes, my experience is that women want to be "right" far more often than men. Men, in turn, just "want to get the job done" far more often than women. This is a source of great conflict, which can only be resolved when both sides appease each other verbally and then go about their business being right or getting the job done.
1. Just for the record, momma's boys tend to kiss their momma's behind (usually sagging, big behind) They will never cut apron string and will always choose their momma over their wives. They are the least desirable in the dating world.
2. momma's boy is an automatic deal beaker. Period.
In general, women want a good man, not just a nice guy. Women will not respect a man without principles. However, MOST women want to be respected, pampered, loved, and cherished in a relationship. They also want somebody they can look up to, whom she can share inner feelings with.
Yeah, that's is what I am getting at. And I like you stated above that I put bold. I too believe something along these lines, i.e., strength of character. That's my point, how do you know when it's not there or not enough?
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