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I been married for only a few years and reaching new levels of sexual experimentation to make things more fun. As things have been getting more exciting I worry about what level to take things before it gets weird and could even ruin a wonderful relationship. What level have you went, and what were the implications.
I am sure married people who are married for longer than 5, 10, 15 years go through this or their marriage will become one long boring sex life of weekly missionary sex after the world news.
If you're both into it, it's not weird. If one person insists and the other resists, then you're creating problems. Do you mean kinks and fetishes level?
Variety, IMO, is more important than pushing limits into uncharted territory. Perhaps you need more radical experimentation to keep you interested, but I don't think that's generally true. I think it's entirely possible to never try anything much outside your comfort zone, yet still mix it up with the things you know and like already - time, place, initiator, positions, etc., can be enough. After 13 years we've learned and tried some new things, but they are mostly extensions or variants of what we already discovered we liked. The variety is endless, has never become boring or routine, even with daily "repetition".
I agree. If whatever you try is something your partner is also willing to try with you, no big deal. Just talk it out. Work together.
My wife and I really have not been into fetish kind of things. The variety and spice to keep things fresh is more in location, time of day, and to some extent spontenaity. Doing things to keep it out of getting stuck in the rut of the same routine.
I think the idea that sexual things are arranged in a 'ladder' of increasing excitement, with the most exciting things being closest to the uncomfortably weird things is bizarre. Where did you get this idea?
The way it works IRL, in my experience, is that you try a bunch of things. Some of them you both like a lot, and those you do again as frequently as you feel like. Some one likes more than the other, and those are saved for special occasions. Some neither one likes that much, so you maybe don't try them again until some years later. Some seem weird, and then you have a good time laughing over them, and switch to something else.
As long as you're both happy with how it's going, I don't see the problem. I'd say though, if you're really kinking it up, that you should probably make sure to have some plain-vanilla sex a certain percentage of the time, just to keep that in your repertoire and maintain your enjoyment of it. Sure, it might not be absolutely mind-blowing, but it's still pretty damn awesome
As long as you're both happy with how it's going, I don't see the problem. I'd say though, if you're really kinking it up, that you should probably make sure to have some plain-vanilla sex a certain percentage of the time, just to keep that in your repertoire and maintain your enjoyment of it. Sure, it might not be absolutely mind-blowing, but it's still pretty damn awesome
Damn...reading this really makes me hate being freaking single!
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