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Is it better to wait for someone who wants you, than to try and make someone want you?
Well in my experience I tried the waiting. That didn't work. Then I took someone and tried to force them to love me with a knife (so they say). She told me she loved me after *ahum* a few things! I thought everything was going fine. She said that she loved me and convinced me that sex would me much better without the handcuffs. So I let her go, and then she ran, and I missed and the rest is well let's just say history..Let's just say, with good time included (fingers crossed) I'll be out in about ten!
Brought to you buy "something tapped" (or whatever neat new gadget people are now using) from cell block 6, Attica, N.Y
Disclaimer. This is obvious a joke for those who have a hard time distinguishing between the two..
Last edited by supermanpansy; 05-29-2013 at 01:15 PM..
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,144,031 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by Checkered24
It may be in the nitty gritty of the communication going on. If in doubt, ask.
So if I meet a girl at a party, after an hour or so of good convo, good vibes, lots of smiles and positive body language I should ask 'are you attracted to me?' before I try to lean in and kiss her? lol
Waiting doesn't work very well. You need to be visible and active to get noticed, and have some kind of interaction to build on.
You can't make someone want you if they don't respond to a direct approach. You can only hope they notice how great you are over time, by being around them when possible without forcing the issue or making too much effort to get closer - else you'll surely make them not want you for certain!
So if I meet a girl at a party, after an hour or so of good convo, good vibes, lots of smiles and positive body language I should ask 'are you attracted to me?' before I try to lean in and kiss her? lol
If all signals are go, what are you in doubt about that you would ask? Make the move.
This is what I sometimes tell myself. I've never been a 'chaser', maybe that doesn't make me an alpha male, but I'm also not the type to try to convince a girl or woo her if she seems unwilling. Not that I've tried it and failed I've just never tried it. Do you think it's possible to woo someone who starts out having zero attraction for you with your personality.etc? Or does there always have to be some initial attraction?
My thinking is that, if I meet someone who seems attractive enough (overall not just physically) and she happens to fancy me, things will happen and she'll be much more interested in me anyway. Maybe I'll be waiting for awhile, but do you think I can afford to do this, or that as a male I must be actively pursuing?
Also, how can one develop affection, even the shallow kind, between two people? I could try to be like friends, but there's the danger of becoming platonic friends and 'friend-zoned.' Or maybe the FZ doesn't really exist and any friend is a potential romantic interest. Is there a certain way you flirt, without being overt that you like someone, where you can develop the attraction in a woman?
I'm not necessarily going to wait around per say, but if it came down to either waiting for a woman who wants me or making another woman want me if she doesn't, I prefer waiting. Otherwise, there are plenty of women out there that would be glad to be with me (even 1% would be plenty among billions.)
As far as not being overt to the person you like, that is actually a big mistake. If you are interested in someone, you let her know boldly, yet in a way that would not make her uncomfortable. Just tell her like its no big deal. Sometimes you want to be respectfully overt. This is where confidence comes in.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,144,031 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by TaoistDude
Waiting doesn't work very well. You need to be visible and active to get noticed, and have some kind of interaction to build on.
You can't make someone want you if they don't respond to a direct approach. You can only hope they notice how great you are over time, by being around them when possible without forcing the issue or making too much effort to get closer - else you'll surely make them not want you for certain!
There are those who might want to take it really slow and won't respond right away. Subjectively, I've no experiencing meeting a girl and even making out and having a fling with her later on. All my experiences with kissing were kind of artificial or random, for instance.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,144,031 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by Checkered24
If all signals are go, what are you in doubt about that you would ask? Make the move.
I've never remotely entered that territory/got that close to someone before, so I'd be scared she'd give me a slap or as shocked look if I tried to move in.
I actually think I'm a decent conversationalist, I'm just shy and rarely get the chance to meet new women.
Okay, that can be worked around. Whenever you have the time, just go places where you can meet women and engage in a conversation. Don't get too attached to results, you will get discouraged.
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,544 posts, read 56,144,031 times
Reputation: 11862
Quote:
Originally Posted by TJenkins602
I'm not necessarily going to wait around per say, but if it came down to either waiting for a woman who wants me or making another woman want me if she doesn't, I prefer waiting. Otherwise, there are plenty of women out there that would be glad to be with me (even 1% would be plenty among billions.)
As far as not being overt to the person you like, that is actually a big mistake. If you are interested in someone, you let her know boldly, yet in a way that would not make her uncomfortable. Just tell her like its no big deal. Sometimes you want to be respectfully overt. This is where confidence comes in.
Thing is I've yet to have found anyone I've really liked, for a long time now, due to basically hardly meeting any new women.
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