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i've tried this. not asking, necessarily, but finding out one way or another.
the odds are not good, i'll put it that way. they certainly aren't good enough to spend time reading through those profiles.
that's exactly what i do
well, i may not look like the guy i used to, but i don't consider myself a beggar.
one of the issues i have with online dating is that i can, and do, attract much higher-quality women whenever i get out in the social world and talk to people. without this critical perspective, i might actually believe some of the suggestions i read on this forum.
Maybe I'm just a speed reader then, because when I was doing OLD I didn't mind 'wasting' 3 minutes reading someone's profile. I actually put a lot of effort into reading and sending messages and even though I very rarely received a response I didn't really consider it wasting my time. Of course, if a guy was overweight or obese or even not that physically attractive it wasn't a deal breaker to me so maybe that's why my perspective is different.
even though I very rarely received a response I didn't really consider it wasting my time.
then your goals must be different than mine.
sending a message with no response is a waste of time in my book.
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Of course, if a guy was overweight or obese or even not that physically attractive it wasn't a deal breaker to me so maybe that's why my perspective is different.
a lot of the girls i like are overweight. in fact one of the baristas i'm scheming on right now is overweight and sexy as hell. so that's not a big deal at all; it's more about shape than anything.
but the real point i'm trying to make is that "fear of the unknown" is great among online daters. If I'm online, and I'm given nothing to work with visually, i don't assume average body types (by anybody's standards). I assume the worst: Not average, or pudgy, or overweight, but HUGE.
sending a message with no response is a waste of time in my book.
I figured if I was looking for a potential long term partner (and perhaps even someone I was going to spend the rest of my life with) 3 minutes out of my day is a drop in the bucket. If you're only looking to hookup or casually date then that's a whole different thing.
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a lot of the girls i like are overweight. in fact one of the baristas i'm scheming on right now is overweight and sexy as hell. so that's not a big deal at all; it's more about shape than anything.
Then why not give some of the women you previously thought were 'fat' a chance? Maybe they just photograph horribly? Though if you can't spend 3 minutes reading a profile maybe a 20 minute coffee date is too much to ask.
Guys: online dating is a numbers game. Don't waste too much time trying to craft the perfect message to send to that 8/10 -- odds are, unless you are extremely attractive to her/meet her standards, she won't respond.
Online dating is also much, much better for women. Pretty much echo the sentiments of what everyone has already said. One of my guy friends is cute, has a good job, good personality. But even he has trouble on those websites, gets responses from less than half the women he messages.
I figured if I was looking for a potential long term partner (and perhaps even someone I was going to spend the rest of my life with) 3 minutes out of my day is a drop in the bucket. If you're only looking to hookup or casually date then that's a whole different thing.
we're getting way ahead of ourselves by trying to distinguish between sex and relationships and what not.
see, i'm literally looking to meet someone in person. that's it; no further schemes. i'll decide later if i want a hookup or a wife or nothing at all.
and like i say -- when you take 3 minutes, multiply that by a very large number of people, and still get no results, then no .... its not a drop in the bucket.
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Then why not give some of the women you previously thought were 'fat' a chance? Maybe they just photograph horribly?
you lost me here.
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Though if you can't spend 3 minutes reading a profile maybe a 20 minute coffee date is too much to ask.
20 minutes x 1 coffee date = 20 minutes and a possible connection
3 minutes reading a profile x 3 minutes writing to a profile x 20 profiles = 2 hours, probably meeting no one
we're getting way ahead of ourselves by trying to distinguish between sex and relationships and what not.
see, i'm literally looking to meet someone in person. that's it; no further schemes. i'll decide later if i want a hookup or a wife or nothing at all.
and like i say -- when you take 3 minutes, multiply that by a very large number of people, and still get no results, then no .... its not a drop in the bucket.
I sent out around 10-15 messages a week minimum....sometimes it was upwards of 40 or 50. Out of those, I maybe received 5 responses a month if I was lucky. Was it a pain? Sure. Did any of those messages or meetups turn into a relationship? Not one in 4 years of doing online dating. I still don't regret the time I spent or the people I met...even the crazy ones.
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you lost me here.
Didn't you mention you were not ok with the prospect of wasting time with 'fat chicks'? Maybe those women you declined based on not having full body photos or being potentially 'fat' just photographed weird or looked better in real life. Why wouldn't you give them a chance?
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20 minutes x 1 coffee date = 20 minutes and a possible connection
3 minutes reading a profile x 3 minutes writing to a profile x 20 profiles = 2 hours, probably meeting no one
2 hours? That's it? I spend 2 hours a day commuting to work and back home, 2 hours is a miniscule amount of time.
Are there any guys on pof ( plenty of fish dating website) who have successful profiles?? i mean there are at least a billion youtube videos on improving your profile to get more messages but ive tried it and still nothing??? My professional Hypothesis is that the majority of the girls on there are very shallow and just want like this fantasy ryan gosling look alike. But im a pretty good looking guy i dont see why im having such a hard time. 20 years old not really looking for a relationship but i am keeping my eyes open ( if that makes any sense) but sometimes it just never works out. maybe im crazy i dont really know what women perfer these days. Also i would like some comments from women. I want to know what goes on in you guy's heads when on a dating website?
I'm a female. I didn't care much about the photos. If the guy took time to write a narrative section in his profile and came across as intelligent, with a good sense of humor, that caught my attention and prompted me to write to him.
I met a few decent men through POF but had to weed through an awful lot of profiles that were just garbage and/or creepy. I don't care if you make a ton of money or if you drive an expensive car. Stuff like that in a profile is a turnoff to me.
I had much better luck with two paid dating websites. My bf and I just celebrated the 2-year anniversary of our meeting via online dating.
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I've always thought it was funny that apparently 100% of the women who do online dating are fat single moms. All of them. I have a feeling these guys are overlooking plenty of possible matches because they aren't pretty enough or maybe aren't showing enough cleavage in their pictures to grab their attention.
Of course, at least the women have the courage to say they're single Moms unlike the men who hide their children and pretend they don't exist.
This is EXTREMELY accurate lol
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