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But you do have plenty of time to watch TV, movies, listen to music, scratch your behind, watch the grass grow, and so on. You do have time to date...it is just that actually going out on a date, let alone actively dating, cuts into your "other" time. And if not that, then you simply do not want to exert the effort required to go on a date.
The only thing you gain outside of more notches on your bedpost with experience is confidence. At some point it ceases to matter if you been on one date or 100, or had sex numerous times or only once (even if with only the same partner). And to add, each person is different with individual desires and expectations. One woman might think you are Superman in bed while another will be left wondering what in the heck you were trying to do.
So just conjure up some self-confidence from any corner of your life you can find and go for it. The wittier you are, the better. Believe me, it helps.
I do not have time for TV or Xbox 360 right now I have books to read. As well as homework is more important right now.
When I get into the nursing program i will not have much time to date.
If it's irrelevant, why do women always go through the trouble of pointing out it's something that is undesirable, either through their actions, or outright in a more anonymous setting, like here? It's extremely difficult to be confident about something you have no experience in, and all the more intimidating when that lack of experience disqualifies you from the get go, not to mention frustrating. I guess the point I'm driving at, even though it's moot, is why is being inexperienced so horrible, for a man that is. I don't think men hold women to such standards, yet it seems universal that women find the lack of experience unattractive (in a man).
I am looking down the barrel at 40, and have dated what I would like to consider a good number of women all across the Country. I also have many female friends, acquaintances, etc. I have never once heard from one women that they go through the trouble of pointing out lack of experience is a deal breaker. In fact, do you know what a lack of experience says? It says that you are coachable. The only thing that is more desirable to a woman, perhaps, other than a man who magically knows what to do is a man she can train to do what she wants to do.
Most women, and men, do want to know what kind of experiences you have and how many. But most also know this is a land mine of a topic to discuss. So most people lie, apply formulas (if a guy says he slept with X number of women, divide by two to get the real number....), or outright avoid the question. It's perfectly okay to not answer the question, you know, as long as you do it tastefully.
A 30 year old virgin who has a full, interesting, life is one thing. A 30 year old virgin who still lives in his mother's basement is another. Catch my drift?
You know, we all had zero experience at some point. It is not your lack of experience that scares women off, but more the possible reasons behind them. Once again, it is not a lack of experience that worries them.
You can also mask your lack of experience by simply being a gentleman, following her lead (by listening...and believe me, she is leading you), and asking questions. If you are unsure if you should hold her hand or not, ask. Ask, Would you mind if I hold your hand? Yes, her girlfriends will think you are a dork for having asked first, but you know what, she'll think it is the sweetest thing. Same goes for a good-night kiss.
I have a friend who raised a child with her BF while going through her nursing program. Straight As and had time to hang out....just not everyday. My ex also went through a nursing program, then the NCLEX, then grad school. I am familiar with this first hand. The real "time away from dating" came with studying for the NCLEX. But, that was just her, I suppose.
I also know others who went through nursing programs. Most, if not all, programs have a waiting list unless you go to a private university. Some of these waits can be up to five years, and, the "pre-nursing" is just getting through the required courses that are required, but not locked, to nursing majors. You know, like organic chemistry, statistics, comp, etc. Many also do some kind clinical, if they can, or volunteer work in this time, also, to gain experience.
Yes, there is an awful lot to learn, but as the article you linked to points out, the what you are really learning is critical thinking. No one is really going to give a **** what you remember from orgo. All they will care about is that you act like a professional nurse at all times.....and that you are not going to accidentally kill a patient.
Good luck, and yes, a little confidence does go a long way
This thread also turned into discussion about having time to date (which is relevant to this topic) but I'm just going to answer the first question. Yes, I would date someone inexperienced. But I am a good deal younger than you are so I am not sure how I would feel when I turn 30. Right now, I do not place a huge emphasis on sex. Yeah it's an important part of a relationship but if you are inexperienced and are willing to learn from a more experienced partner, then you can only get better.
I would also rather date a nurse than someone in what you said was a "dead end retail job"!
You should have just left the question in the title. Never explain, never complain. I did not date for many years after college. Why? Out of site - out of mind - didn't feel like it - gone fishing, literally .
Its not real complicated. If it were there would be landing lights. Its like driving with top of the line accessories.
Stop starting sentences with "I feel". Based upon your late career choice, passivity and posting style, you appear indecisive. Doesn't matter what you look like. Lack of decisiveness hangs like a stink in the air to them. Women complain about "feelings" from the strong and silent types sitting on the leeward side of the mountain, aka often the men they crave, but its has to rain some time. Its the opposite with the - I am there for you - types. You have that covered. Show em you can care less. Never try to compete directly with their imagination.
Why the hell do they even need to know anyway? I have secrets I don't even want to know about.
I am looking down the barrel at 40, and have dated what I would like to consider a good number of women all across the Country. I also have many female friends, acquaintances, etc. I have never once heard from one women that they go through the trouble of pointing out lack of experience is a deal breaker. In fact, do you know what a lack of experience says? It says that you are coachable. The only thing that is more desirable to a woman, perhaps, other than a man who magically knows what to do is a man she can train to do what she wants to do.
Most women, and men, do want to know what kind of experiences you have and how many. But most also know this is a land mine of a topic to discuss. So most people lie, apply formulas (if a guy says he slept with X number of women, divide by two to get the real number....), or outright avoid the question. It's perfectly okay to not answer the question, you know, as long as you do it tastefully.
A 30 year old virgin who has a full, interesting, life is one thing. A 30 year old virgin who still lives in his mother's basement is another. Catch my drift?
You know, we all had zero experience at some point. It is not your lack of experience that scares women off, but more the possible reasons behind them. Once again, it is not a lack of experience that worries them.
You can also mask your lack of experience by simply being a gentleman, following her lead (by listening...and believe me, she is leading you), and asking questions. If you are unsure if you should hold her hand or not, ask. Ask, Would you mind if I hold your hand? Yes, her girlfriends will think you are a dork for having asked first, but you know what, she'll think it is the sweetest thing. Same goes for a good-night kiss.
Here's what I've learned. If any guy wants to date in USA it's only a smart thing to push for sex as it's best for mainstream dating. And this rather depends on one's upbringing than the biology itself. The bold part in your post speaks of my personal experience as well, but here's my interpretation: If a woman evaluates you as someone who's "normal, working and having a perspective to make something out of yourself", she'll forego everything and PRETEND that you're a good match for her.
Until then, she'll probably be around with various boyfriends who "know" what they're doing in bed (and focus on having sex around) - but who obviously don't know what they're doing with their lives.
So much about liking virgins or disliking virgins. That's why 30 y/o unemployed virgin who lives with his parents won't be an attractive person to be taught.
My observation is that not many guys will even approach women, or rather not as often - and most approaches will be focused on having short-term sex. Most guys will be focused on being in their own company except when they plan on finding someone to "date for sex".
It seems that "virgin option" is only good if the guy is someone that can be brought home. That's highly dysfunctional in the future but they DON'T CARE. Stories of sexual compatibility somehow cease to exist, even though primary factor in sexual compatibility is having similar past.
This is why I advised the OP indirectly in my previous post to either go around and have sex with anyone and not take obligation for anyone (except for children if he gets to have them, and he'll have to do it regardless if he wants it or not since he's legally obliged), or disregard everything focus on finding someone who has the same past and views on sex as him.
I am firm in my belief that over 95% of virgin guys in USA are remaining so because they are either not trying for some reason and that reason usually comes from their upbringing at their home. They should "unlearn" that upbringing and adopt the one that fits mainstream way of how things are going, or they should focus on finding a woman who has the same past/upbringing. I'd say the easier option is option 1 in USA. Opting to remain virgin and then marrying a woman with "troubled past" is a recipe for disaster as well as low self esteem and misery. Masochism might be a good word to describe most common reason.
um..... I have one sexual partner it was more of a friends with benefits thing it lasted 6 months so it not like i do not have any experience .
Yea, I do not have to tell a girl anything about my past but it does not make the anxiety go away when you do not have much experience in dating long term.
Sure some woman will not care at all but most woman have a 3 strikes your out rule when it comes to sex.
I just feel i cant win right now if i do this I cant have this and if i do the other thing i cant have the other.
I do need to get out there more but i want to get good grades there are a lot of people smarter then me but i will out work you and punch you in the mouth .
My best bet might be to get more experience is to find another friends with benefits.
um..... I have one sexual partner it was more of a friends with benefits thing it lasted 6 months so it not like i do not have any experience .
Yea, I do not have to tell a girl anything about my past but it does not make the anxiety go away when you do not have much experience in dating long term.
I just saw some guy in a vid scare off a black rhino. I'll bet he just started out by hanging out with rhinos. And if you are going to nursing school, you may as well be Barishnakoff. I don't think the straight men in that field suffer by such an advantageous skew in sex ratio. Study buddies....
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Sure some woman will not care at all but most woman have a 3 strikes your out rule when it comes to sex.
3 outs and nine innings. Don't forget about road games and exhibition. Sometimes they go over time. If that goes wrong, then there is always A ball. Lot a lonely girls out there that think they need a nose job.
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I just feel i cant win right now if i do this I cant have this and if i do the other thing i cant have the other.
Me too, but its easier to take with good company and brandy. Winter is tough.
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I do need to get out there more but i want to get good grades there are a lot of people smarter then me but i will out work you and punch you in the mouth .
I think you missed the point of health care.
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My best bet might be to get more experience is to find another friends with benefits.
Your best bet is to strut. You have ambition, no baggage , in you prime and the finest advice. Looking back its the rejections I miss the most. some times I'd win one over and it was just one of those boring conversations that went nowhere. Being an object of hate is refreshing.
I just saw some guy in a vid scare off a black rhino. I'll bet he just started out by hanging out with rhinos. And if you are going to nursing school, you may as well be Barishnakoff. I don't think the straight men in that field suffer by such an advantageous skew in sex ratio. Study buddies....
3 outs and nine innings. Don't forget about road games and exhibition. Sometimes they go over time. If that goes wrong, then there is always A ball. Lot a lonely girls out there that think they need a nose job.
Me too, but its easier to take with good company and brandy. Winter is tough.
I think you missed the point of health care.
Your best bet is to strut. You have ambition, no baggage , in you prime and the finest advice. Looking back its the rejections I miss the most. some times I'd win one over and it was just one of those boring conversations that went nowhere. Being an object of hate is refreshing.
The reason I ask is I feel like I can’t have it all right now. I am at a fork in the road sort of speak I can keep on doing what I am doing now or I can make my dream become a reality. Here is some back ground on my lack of dating and what not.
Due to many factors, I have been pretty far behind the curve when it comes to relationships and sex. Did casual dating a few times when I was in high school/college (as in we go out 1-2 times just for fun, never get physical at all) but didn't date in any form for most of my teen years due to personal issues (mostly due to massive shyness/social-anxiety problems) through school, I was socially awkward and never fit in with anyone's circle. No one would invite me in to their group.
I've managed to turn things around a bit and can talk to anyone. I am a different person now I just had to look at this way no one cares. I did not date until college and went on about 10 to 12 dates with different woman so asking a girl out is not my problem.
The longest I have dated the same girl was probably for about 6 months or so and it wasn't even anything serious. I t was a FB kind of thing so when she was done it was over. This is my only sexual partner I know sad for my age but it is what it is. To make matters worse she just kind of laid there and did not do anything there was no passion at all. I feel like I should of pick someone I liked and some one that liked me back.
Now that I am turning 30 (sad) next month I have two options.
One is to work my dead end retail job and in ten years I can make 20 bucks an hour. Sure I have a job, car, and my own place no roommates. I do not make that much money 19.00 an hour is not livable wage and sure as hell can’t feed a family when I am just above the poverty line. If one wanted to live in the city a studio apartment will run you about $1,300 a month and if you wanted to live outside the city a one bedroom apartment will run you 800 to 1k a month.
As for my job it is NOT challenging or rewarding and a cave man can do it. There is no wear to move up in this company unless you want to sale your soul for a few more hundred dollars. I need to break the family trend of workaholics and working two jobs for lame pay and no family life.
That being said If I end up working retail I am just going to give up on the whole idea of meet a girl and starting a family and having kids. I just be the crazy cat guy with 13 cats and eat cans of dog food for dinner.
My next option one that I am going with right now is going back to college.
That being said I am still going to work full time and have been taking class at a community college and get my PRE-NURSING Associate of Applied Science Degree and then transfer over to a four year college to get my Bachelor of Science in Nursing.
My main source of inspiration to become a nurse comes from an innate desire to help people and care for them in times of need. I am also a person who thrives on being challenged and I always have new goals to achieve, so nursing suits me as few other careers offer as much diversity and learning opportunities. I am a caring, empathetic, calm, patient, flexible, a good listener, and like to help people and empathetic .On top of that I pay attention to details and good at solving problems and finding solutions.
I can move up into other jobs at the hospital and feel like I am working on something which is good for me.
I still have to finish College prerequisites and have a few before I can apply for the program.
Once in the nursing program it is 8am till 5pm Monday -Friday. On top of that I have about 100 to 200 pages to read a night.
I feel I might not have time to date much but I am fine with it.
When I am done with school I feel like women will tend to avoid inexperienced guys, and generally for good reason. When thinking of someone with little to no dating experience, more than likely there's the image of an unattractive coach potato with no life, which never interacts with women and has no social skills. It's assumed that if a guy is attractive, smart, funny, has a good direction in his life, he's a catch and probably has plenty of dating experience. But what if that's not the case and the handsome guy actually doesn't have much dating history? Would this still be enough to send most women running?
I'd say that I'm a pretty attractive guy. I'm fit, smart, funny, and very ambitious. I have pic in profile to prove that I am not ugly LOL. To be honest woman tell me if I wanted a GF all I have to do is ask.
I worry if I finish college and start dating woman will think there is something wrong with me and not want to date me. Not too many women want to teach a guy anything in the bedroom.
I am going to try to get out there and meet woman and have some fun .
I don't see why you'd have a problem. I know I don't make a habit of asking guys about their experience level. In the beginning at least. Now when it comes to sex and possibly being unprotected then it will be discussed.
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), or outright avoid the question. It's perfectly okay to not answer the question, you know, as long as you do it tastefully. 
