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This is so lame and ridiculous! I know a number of young, attractive women, and they're all available. They're busy building their careers or going to grad school. Maybe instead of hitting up service personnel (not this, AGAIN! ), you should get active in your community, try to make a positive contribution to the world instead of spending your precious life whining, or take some university evening classes, and you might meet some of these bright, accomplished, attractive and single women.
Likewise. I have 4 female friends, all in their late twenties to mid thirties, who would be excellent catches and have strong life-mate potential. They're not model-gorgeous but they're certainly attractive. And they're all currently single.
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Originally Posted by wall st kid
Don't get so hung up on looks, your goal should be to find a person with a great personality and an amazing heart.
This. I've lectured my brother on this many times. He wants to get married and have children so badly he can taste it, but he keeps chasing the wrong women.
Plenty of Fish won't work unless the guy is tall and good-looking.
I was being facetious. I don't actually recommend anyone use PoF as a legit means to date in a serious capacity.
In what way does PoF only work if one is tall and good-looking? It's not a stretch to say it's all subjective, attraction/appearance. I mean, I assume it's important to most people to be attracted to potential matches, but "good-looking" is a bit subjective.
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OP's best bet, as far as dating sites go, is to genuinely convert to Christianity and then try one of those sites, as the women on there are less likely to go for looks and height (which, as OP has said in the past, he has neither).
Christian women care less about looks and more about one's, what, salvation?
Yes, I've dated many and have many female friends.
I currently have a FWB. She is cute, but not insanely hot. She has TONS of guys going after her. Guys in real life, guys on dating sites, everywhere. And she is roughly in my league, looks-wise. Whenever she does online dating, the flood gates open. This goes for all of my female friends.
In my experience, women will SAY they go for more than looks, but that all goes away when a good-looking guy comes around. Of course, they will date a less than good-looking guy if at least one of following criteria is met:
1) There is no one better around.
2) The less than good-looking guy tries REALLY hard.
3) The less than good-looking guy has some kind of superior social status.
This brings me to my next point: Why on earth do the women of City Data lie so much about how things really are? I'm inclined to assume either you all are unattractive, older (and don't remember how easy things were for you), or have no awareness of how much harder men generally have it than women in the dating world.
Theorem. Let X be the set of all attractive women and let Y be the set of all currently available women. Then XintsctY = ø.
Proof. Life experience.
Today I was at Starbucks reading and saw a girl who works at the front desk at my gym. She always smiles and says bye to me when I leave the gym. I thought about maybe striking up a conversation with her. But I didn't, because I assumed she has a boyfriend. Sure enough, a guy who was clearly her boyfriend came in and talked to her after an hour or so. (Of course he had male model looks.)
This has happened so many times that I'm glad I don't even bother trying to strike up conversations with attractive women. Any woman who is above average in looks and personality is taken.
Searching for an attractive mate is futile, especially if you're not good looking. I'm not sure why torture myself by thinking that I have a chance with sexy, smart women. They just hop from one good-looking guy to the next one.
First you say they don't exist, then you say you don't have a chance with them. Which is it?
I was being facetious. I don't actually recommend anyone use PoF as a legit means to date in a serious capacity.
In what way does PoF only work if one is tall and good-looking? It's not a stretch to say it's all subjective, attraction/appearance. I mean, I assume it's important to most people to be attracted to potential matches, but "good-looking" is a bit subjective.
Good looks are based on facial proportions. A person that is generically good-looking will have WAY more options than a person that isn't. Online dating magnifies this.
Also, height is a trait that is desired by all women. In the online dating world, stats are the first thing that women see. Since most women are flooded with messages, it is an easy and convenient way to weed out guys.
OP has stated in previous posts that he is short and, thus, will do poorly with online dating.
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Christian women care less about looks and more about one's, what, salvation?
I've seen them give more leeway when it comes to looks. I have some dreadfully ugly Christian friends that actually met some decent looking women on these sites. I recently had a friend of mine, who is Indian, about 5'5, balding, and shy get into a relationship with an above average looking blonde from a Christian dating site.
I'm not saying it will work, but I think it's his best bet based on my observations.
Yes, I've dated many and have many female friends.
I currently have a FWB. She is cute, but not insanely hot. She has TONS of guys going after her. Guys in real life, guys on dating sites, everywhere. And she is roughly in my league, looks-wise. Whenever she does online dating, the flood gates open. This goes for all of my female friends.
In my experience, women will SAY they go for more than looks, but that all goes away when a good-looking guy comes around. Of course, they will date a less than good-looking guy if at least one of following criteria is met:
1) There is no one better around.
2) The less than good-looking guy tries REALLY hard.
3) The less than good-looking guy has some kind of superior social status.
"When a good-looking guy comes around" suggests these women show interest or get involved with not so good-looking men until... a better option is presented?
Wait. But before you state women "say" they go for more than looks. "More" implies they don't just go for someone good-looking, that there has to be other criteria met in order for things to progress. For those who are serious about dating, e.g., not those looking for f*ckships, I would hazard a guess they desire more than someone nice to ogle.
I will only get involved with someone who I am attracted to and am highly compatible with. If the chemistry and compatibility aren't there it is an absolute no-go. I won't even entertain a f*ckship until that "better" comes along. Actually, if there is no connection beyond the physical, I can't really stay or remain interested. I've tried, and it doesn't work.
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This brings me to my next point: Why on earth do the women of City Data lie so much about how things really are? I'm inclined to assume either you all are unattractive, older (and don't remember how easy things were for you), or have no awareness of how much harder men generally have it than women in the dating world.
Oh, I certainly won't dispute that. I know men face a far greater challenge than women when it comes to dating. My beau has been in the online dating scene off and on for five years. He's had two relationships result from it, and has gone on several other dates that didn't progress anywhere. He's actually very good-looking, albeit very shy, an introvert, and is pretty nerdy and geeky. While in my dating experience in less than half that time, I've met with dozens of men, have been in a couple relationships, briefly dated some others, and have "options," though these "options" are not what I have wanted. I'm picky as all get-out, and knew exactly what I desired, and was also aware that such would be difficult to find. There have been more misses than hits, but I'm fully aware that I have it "easy" compared to my male counterparts.
"When a good-looking guy comes around" suggests these women show interest or get involved with not so good-looking men until... a better option is presented?
Wait. But before you state women "say" they go for more than looks. "More" implies they don't just go for someone good-looking, that there has to be other criteria met in order for things to progress. For those who are serious about dating, e.g., not those looking for f*ckships, I would hazard a guess they desire more than someone nice to ogle.
I will only get involved with someone who I am attracted to and am highly compatible with. If the chemistry and compatibility aren't there it is an absolute no-go. I won't even entertain a f*ckship until that "better" comes along. Actually, if there is no connection beyond the physical, I can't really stay or remain interested. I've tried, and it doesn't work.
Okay so you will only date a guy if he's very good-looking AND he has a shopping list of other criteria. So that will eliminate a bunch of good-looking guys too.
How is that disproving my point? It actually makes it worse.
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Oh, I certainly won't dispute that. I know men face a far greater challenge than women when it comes to dating.
Good to hear a woman finally admit this.
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My beau has been in the online dating scene off and on for five years. He's had two relationships result from it, and has gone on several other dates that didn't progress anywhere. He's actually very good-looking, albeit very shy, an introvert, and is pretty nerdy and geeky. While in my dating experience in less than half that time, I've met with dozens of men, have been in a couple relationships, briefly dated some others, and have "options," though these "options" are not what I have wanted. I'm picky as all get-out, and knew exactly what I desired, and was also aware that such would be difficult to find. There have been more misses than hits, but I'm fully aware that I have it "easy" compared to my male counterparts.
This is why I advocate traveling and dating abroad to most men. I've found the opposite to be true in many foreign countries: good men are actually valued there. I used to be one of the guys that chased women around like crazy and talked about how awesome they were....until I got a MUCH different perspective and saw how men in the west really do get a raw deal when it comes to dating.
Now, I generally choose not to date unless the girl comes to me with little to no effort on my part (which does happen from time to time).
Good looks are based on facial proportions. A person that is generically good-looking will have WAY more options than a person that isn't. Online dating magnifies this.
True. But again, what one person finds attractive another may not. I have a wide range of what I find attractive.
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Also, height is a trait that is desired by all women. In the online dating world, stats are the first thing that women see. Since most women are flooded with messages, it is an easy and convenient way to weed out guys.
OP has stated in previous posts that he is short and, thus, will do poorly with online dating.
A lot of women prefer taller or tall men, yes, but there are some who simply do not care. I'm 5'9.5" and I've gone out with a number of men who were 5'8" to 5'10". Actually, my ex-husband is 5'10", as was a past serious partner I met online. The majority of men I have met or gone out with have been under 6 ft. I can count about a dozen men I've gone out with that were between 6' to 6'4", out of 50+. So most have been around my height.
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I've seen them give more leeway when it comes to looks. I have some dreadfully ugly Christian friends that actually met some decent looking women on these sites. I recently had a friend of mine, who is Indian, about 5'5, balding, and shy get into a relationship with an above average looking blonde from a Christian dating site.
I'm not saying it will work, but I think it's his best bet based on my observations.
True. But again, what one person finds attractive another may not. I have a wide range of what I find attractive.
A lot of women prefer taller or tall men, yes, but there are some who simply do not care. I'm 5'9.5" and I've gone out with a number of men who were 5'8" to 5'10". Actually, my ex-husband is 5'10", as was a past serious partner I met online. The majority of men I have met or gone out with have been under 6 ft. I can count about a dozen men I've gone out with that were between 6' to 6'4", out of 50+. So most have been around my height.
Okay. But would you date a guy shorter than you by a couple of inches?
LOL nevermind. Don't answer that. We both already know the answer.
As I said, OP said in multiple threads that he is short (around 5'6 or 5'7 I think). So that DRASTICALLY reduces the women that would be willing to date him.
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I don't presume it would work for most people.
As I said (and we both agreed upon), men have very little choice as far as mates here in the west. Many have to go with one of the few women that choose them. That guy that I listed had probably the worst combination of traits one can have (a less than desirable race, hair loss, short, shy....and he is on the downslope of the looks curve, as well). If this guy can get a girl from a site like that, I'm sure OP has a chance. He certainly will not do better on Plenty of Fish, OkCupid, and Match. LOL
Okay so you will only date a guy if he's very good-looking AND he has a shopping list of other criteria. So that will eliminate a bunch of good-looking guys too.
Good-looking to me. Isn't that everyone's criteria? I don't expect my "match" or partner to be good-looking to others. Actually, the first serious relationship that started online, OKC, he would be considered average-looking by most standards. He stated such himself. I thought he was very attractive, and that's what mattered.
And yes, my other criteria eliminates many, even the classically good-looking.
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How is that disproving my point? It actually makes it worse.
But it doesn't. I don't think anyone, those who are serious about dating, seeks out a partner they don't find attractive. Are you suggesting one need not be attracted to their partner? For most that is fundamental, a necessary component in chemistry/connection.
However, I'm sure there are other necessary components as well for those looking for more than something transient.
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), you should get active in your community, try to make a positive contribution to the world instead of spending your precious life whining, or take some university evening classes, and you might meet some of these bright, accomplished, attractive and single women. 
