True or false: It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all?
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I'm glad that I've tried my hand at a few relationships, but not because I cherish the memories. I know now that most relationships are a waste of time for me and I should only date someone I really have strong feelings for (which is rare), not just anyone who shows interest or messages me on a dating app.
I'm the same way. I've never had strong feelings. Problem is sometimes strong feelings take a bit to develop. All I ever end up doing is breaking girls hearts.
It depends on the individual, because each individual can decide the extent to which romantic love is a pivotal factor in his or her life. Yes, I understand that it's blasphemous to suggest that romantic love is an individual matter that people can decide for themselves. I also understand that I will be accused of being anti romantic love because I don't give witness to its transcendence.
I'm not against romantic love, but I am against all the pressure over it. If somebody's answer is that they're fine without having loved, it isn't anybody's place to tell that person that he or she is wrong or broken. It certainly isn't their place to tell that person that if they haven't loved, they have nothing. The idea that nothing you do matters if you aren't pursuing romantic love is all over the place, but that isn't everybody's truth. A person who hasn't prioritized romantic love can still have a fulfilling life, and many lifelong non-romantics do just that. An onlooker's feelings about predetermined correctness has nothing to do with it.
Famous saying. Do you think this is true or false?
When I think of this from a general standpoint, I think it's true and I would encourage anyone to go for something rather than live life with nothing.
But, when I personalize this (as it pertains to my own life and relationships) I think I was happier before I had love and sex, when I was inexperienced. Of course, I still dreamt of those things and wanted them when I was inexperienced, but I didn't really know what I was missing. I just had ideas. You don't really know what you're missing until you have it. Now that I have had it before and don't have it now, I find that I am less happy than I was when I was inexperienced due to knowing exactly what I am missing. I mean, comparatively speaking. So, in a sense, I think it was better to have never loved at all.
What are your thoughts?
Better to have never loved at all than to experience a loss. But losing people does help one grow and be able to develop more meaningful relationships. It's complicated. I guess.
Better to have never loved at all than to experience a loss. But losing people does help one grow and be able to develop more meaningful relationships. It's complicated. I guess.
I don't know...
I've definitely loved on many levels and I've lost in different ways. As much as I hate it to this day, but I can see how it can make us better.
The term isn’t meant to imply you will or should feel better about a situation involving loving another, it’s implying that without having another to share your feelings with you would have never known what love could feel like....you would have never had those feelings to feel.
It’s a smaller example of the larger methodology that without the involvement and commingling of others you would be isolated in your own hubris and actions. We need others to have experiences with, share with and learn from, otherwise life is nothing more than our own isolation. What we can gain from others is wider than what we can gain by a solitary and isolated existence.
Life isn’t just about the things that bring you comfort and joy. Discomfort is an inherent part of living.
Avoiding discomfort is avoiding life. Avoiding life is avoiding living.
Last edited by rego00123; 07-16-2019 at 03:01 PM..
l really don't know .
And l;ve wondered believe me.
like wth are you suppose to do with feelings and memories after a 19yr marriage. How are you suppose to feel about it all .
Was it better it happened , god knows, well obviously apart from your kids if you had them.
Or what are you suppose to feel after spending 3yrs with someone and having highs like you've never had , ever, yet it still ends.
Are you lucky because you had those high in your life many won't have, or are they just more useless memories , yaknow,
To stack away with the rest of them like they didn't happen.
Then there's all the heartache and crap you go through when it all turns to crap.
Stuff you can never know if you haven't been through it.
So was it worth it.
Or would you rather have just skipped it all seems as it all came to nothing in the end anyway and with everything you went through because of it all.
Personally, l still don't know if l had the choice knowing the outcome in advance before hand, which path l'd had taken.
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