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Some of you already know my situation with a guy friend of mine. I have mentioned it a few times.
He has been stuck on me for YEARS. I never actually "liked" him anymore than a friend and for a while I thought that's all I thought he wanted in the first place, until he confessed his feelings for me at the end of freshmen year. I told him I didn't feel the same way about him and that was that for a while. We no longer spoke and eventually he started dating my ex best friend. The relationship didn't last long because she discovered he still had feelings for me.
He tried contacting me while still in a relationship with her but of course I rejected him, because he was dating my best friend. Pretty much everyone disapproved of the relationship because he and I were friends before she "waltzed in" and decided she wanted him. I didn't really care that they dated but everyone else was really bothered by it. Eventually they broke up and he hasn't dated anyone since. We got back into contact and he kept saying he's still in love with me and hopes we can be together one day, saying he really hates the decision he made with being with her.
Ever since then, I have been trying to really pull away and I tell him all the time he needs to move on from me, because we will probably never be anything more than what we were in high school. He REFUSES to walk out of my life and he is desperately trying to hold on to a future with me, and he gets deeply upset if I try to end the friendship completely. He's not crazy or stalker or anything he just talks to me on daily basis like a normal friend does but I know deep down inside it really bothers him that we just cannot be. I really want him to move on but he is dead set on the fact that I am the one he is suppose to be with.
In truth, I really hate the fact he feels that way. I know that sounds incredibly ungrateful but it's the truth I don't want to keep hurting him. I know the obvious answer is to just end the friendship so he can move on. But really just want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this. Have any of you been in this situation before?
What's with everyone not approving that "she waltzed in" and dated a guy you are not interested in?
That's an odd stance for "everyone." She can't date him because you and he are friends?
You don't have to "formally" declare you don't want to be friends, you've explained the situation and don't hang out with him. Phones have caller ID, don't answer.
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What's with everyone not approving that "she waltzed in" and dated a guy you are not interested in?
That's an odd stance for "everyone." She can't date him because you and he are friends?
You don't have to "formally" declare you don't want to be friends, you've explained the situation and don't hang out with him. Phones have caller ID, don't answer.
This was WAY back in high school people were younger and more immature back then.
When I say "everyone" I am mainly talking about his friends and mine. Apparently all his friends and mine knew of his feelings for me, and assumed something was going on between us when it wasn't. I guess that's why they thought the whole relationship was wrong.
This was WAY back in high school people were younger and more immature back then.
When I say "everyone" I am mainly talking about his friends and mine. Apparently all his friends and mine knew of his feelings for me, and assumed something was going on between us when it wasn't. I guess that's why they thought the whole relationship was wrong.
Why would they think that? You guys were all friends..... you didn't talk?
You all talked enough for them to convey to someone they thought it was wrong for him to be dating your friend, you couldn't convey that you weren't an item via the same line of communication?
You've told him your stance, just stop being friends. The whole thing sounds like unnecessary drama since high school.
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Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,742,544 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Auraliea
Some of you already know my situation with a guy friend of mine. I have mentioned it a few times.
He has been stuck on me for YEARS. I never actually "liked" him anymore than a friend and for a while I thought that's all I thought he wanted in the first place, until he confessed his feelings for me at the end of freshmen year. I told him I didn't feel the same way about him and that was that for a while. We no longer spoke and eventually he started dating my ex best friend. The relationship didn't last long because she discovered he still had feelings for me.
He tried contacting me while still in a relationship with her but of course I rejected him, because he was dating my best friend. Pretty much everyone disapproved of the relationship because he and I were friends before she "waltzed in" and decided she wanted him. I didn't really care that they dated but everyone else was really bothered by it. Eventually they broke up and he hasn't dated anyone since. We got back into contact and he kept saying he's still in love with me and hopes we can be together one day, saying he really hates the decision he made with being with her.
Ever since then, I have been trying to really pull away and I tell him all the time he needs to move on from me, because we will probably never be anything more than what we were in high school. He REFUSES to walk out of my life and he is desperately trying to hold on to a future with me, and he gets deeply upset if I try to end the friendship completely. He's not crazy or stalker or anything he just talks to me on daily basis like a normal friend does but I know deep down inside it really bothers him that we just cannot be. I really want him to move on but he is dead set on the fact that I am the one he is suppose to be with.
In truth, I really hate the fact he feels that way. I know that sounds incredibly ungrateful but it's the truth I don't want to keep hurting him. I know the obvious answer is to just end the friendship so he can move on. But really just want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this. Have any of you been in this situation before?
Sorry for the essay.
Yes, I've been in this situation. The absolutely best thing you can do, tell him ONE time straight up don't contact me, then block his phone, email, FB. With that time will take its place and you can move on with your life.
Some of you already know my situation with a guy friend of mine. I have mentioned it a few times.
He has been stuck on me for YEARS. I never actually "liked" him anymore than a friend and for a while I thought that's all I thought he wanted in the first place, until he confessed his feelings for me at the end of freshmen year. I told him I didn't feel the same way about him and that was that for a while. We no longer spoke and eventually he started dating my ex best friend. The relationship didn't last long because she discovered he still had feelings for me.
He tried contacting me while still in a relationship with her but of course I rejected him, because he was dating my best friend. Pretty much everyone disapproved of the relationship because he and I were friends before she "waltzed in" and decided she wanted him. I didn't really care that they dated but everyone else was really bothered by it. Eventually they broke up and he hasn't dated anyone since. We got back into contact and he kept saying he's still in love with me and hopes we can be together one day, saying he really hates the decision he made with being with her.
Ever since then, I have been trying to really pull away and I tell him all the time he needs to move on from me, because we will probably never be anything more than what we were in high school. He REFUSES to walk out of my life and he is desperately trying to hold on to a future with me, and he gets deeply upset if I try to end the friendship completely. He's not crazy or stalker or anything he just talks to me on daily basis like a normal friend does but I know deep down inside it really bothers him that we just cannot be. I really want him to move on but he is dead set on the fact that I am the one he is suppose to be with.
In truth, I really hate the fact he feels that way. I know that sounds incredibly ungrateful but it's the truth I don't want to keep hurting him. I know the obvious answer is to just end the friendship so he can move on. But really just want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this. Have any of you been in this situation before?
Sorry for the essay.
Have him over and burn.. I mean cook a nasty dinner.
Suck on garlic to sweeten your breath.
Act like you have been thinking of "us" as you are burning dinner and talking.
See if he still likes you.
Wear your granny panties and anything else that is unattractive.
Lay a nice open mouth fishy kiss on him with your fresh garlic breath.
Tell him thanks for the nice evening and for letting you 'be yourself.'
Some of you already know my situation with a guy friend of mine. I have mentioned it a few times.
He has been stuck on me for YEARS. I never actually "liked" him anymore than a friend and for a while I thought that's all I thought he wanted in the first place, until he confessed his feelings for me at the end of freshmen year. I told him I didn't feel the same way about him and that was that for a while. We no longer spoke and eventually he started dating my ex best friend. The relationship didn't last long because she discovered he still had feelings for me.
He tried contacting me while still in a relationship with her but of course I rejected him, because he was dating my best friend. Pretty much everyone disapproved of the relationship because he and I were friends before she "waltzed in" and decided she wanted him. I didn't really care that they dated but everyone else was really bothered by it. Eventually they broke up and he hasn't dated anyone since. We got back into contact and he kept saying he's still in love with me and hopes we can be together one day, saying he really hates the decision he made with being with her.
Ever since then, I have been trying to really pull away and I tell him all the time he needs to move on from me, because we will probably never be anything more than what we were in high school. He REFUSES to walk out of my life and he is desperately trying to hold on to a future with me, and he gets deeply upset if I try to end the friendship completely. He's not crazy or stalker or anything he just talks to me on daily basis like a normal friend does but I know deep down inside it really bothers him that we just cannot be. I really want him to move on but he is dead set on the fact that I am the one he is suppose to be with.
In truth, I really hate the fact he feels that way. I know that sounds incredibly ungrateful but it's the truth I don't want to keep hurting him. I know the obvious answer is to just end the friendship so he can move on. But really just want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this. Have any of you been in this situation before?
Sorry for the essay.
Been there, done that.
While it's possible you two could have a friendship later down the line, it's really not a good plan to try to maintain one when unrequited love is involved.
For his sake, distance yourself from him.
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