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Talk about a shock / surprise over the weekend. He asked me for my ring size, does this mean it's an engagement ring, or a gift ring, or what??? He said he saw a ring he is thinking about giving me (turquoise inlay with a diamond) that he really likes. Now this is someone that we dated for awhile when we lived in the same town, then he moved and I moved and we've kept in touch but only see each other 2-3 times a year. It's been 3 years since we met and 2 1/2 years since we lived in the same town, so at best it's been a long-distance relationship and just wasn't working for either of us.
Last I heard, we do talk regularly every week or so, he was meeting other people, going on dinner dates. That's why it's such a shock the whole ring thing! And my understanding was that we kept in touch because we like each other and if we were ever to live close by again we might hook up and we didn't want to lose track of each other!
Now he has never given me any gifts before, so this is way out of character for him. Even if it is the holiday season, and my birthday is the same month as his daughter's around this time.
What's your take on this???? It's just such a shock! The few times I have broached getting more serious, when we were going hot and heavy, he backs way, waaaaaaaaay off, so I just let it go and figured it's a ex-lovers keeping in touch because we still like each other, but nothing more than that. Oh and he's also saying things these past few phone conversations like, "You'd make a really good wife" and enumerates my fine qualities in that regard. Again, is he just being supportive of me, or is he sending out signals of another kind????
Your input is much appreciated and welcome.....thanks in advance!!!
Location: The world, where will fate take me this time?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DiamondD
Oh and he's also saying things these past few phone conversations like, "You'd make a really good wife" and enumerates my fine qualities in that regard. Again, is he just being supportive of me, or is he sending out signals of another kind????
Your input is much appreciated and welcome.....thanks in advance!!!
Hmmm those last words turned on my intuition! if that's what you want too I hope I'm right, and I'll send you the best vibe!!
But don't believe me, close your eyes, what you do feel in his words? what you his eyes tell you? think about him, how are you feeling?
Love and Happiness my friend, eternal love and Hapiness, may the morning star shine as bright as the day he asked you this.
But don't believe me, close your eyes, what you do feel in his words? what you his eyes tell you? think about him, how are you feeling?
What a lovely message from you! Thank you!
Well I can't see his eyes because it's been 8 months since I've seen him and the bulk of our relationship is through phone calls, long very personal and satisfying phone calls, but not in person visits. What do I feel in his words? Well sometimes he says things and they never come to pass, so time will tell on that one. How am I feeling? Like he's getting older and he's afraid of losing me to someone else, but also really leery of committing to something more serious. I mean once he said, "Let's talk about moving in together in 10 years after I retire" which just cracked me up!
It sounds like a very nice relationship, the kind we all need in our lives, but it just seems that he would have to be a little bit off to propose in this context. Unless I'm missing something. I don't mean to be the one to throw damp water on this, but I would presume he just wants to demonstrate your special and unique relationship. Maybe he is trying to test your reaction, but is he really the type to do something this bold? [I don't know, I'm just asking].
it just seems that he would have to be a little bit off to propose in this context. Unless I'm missing something. Maybe he is trying to test your reaction, but is he really the type to do something this bold?
No I'm with you, I'm also wondering what am I missing here? Because the whole thing is totally out of character for him. One of the reasons it didn't work out as a long distance relationship was we never got together, he'd say he'd come visit and then he never had any time. So I just wrote it off as not very serious. I'm not being cynical so much as realistic that it's most likely something to string me along because he doesn't want to lose me, but he also doesn't want to put forth the effort or commitment to actually keep the relationship serious and strong and on-going. He knows I'm looking, just like I know he's looking. But every now and then he pulls something like this and it's a total shock. I'm not putting my life on hold for him, did that for about 2 years and it went nowhere. He knows that. So he's straddling the fence, but also trying to find (creative!) ways to keep me hanging in there. Thanks goldenmom, always good to hear from you!
also for awhile I was asking him about having a more committed relationship, and when that went nowhere I stopped. So maybe like you said he is "testing my reaction" in a face-saving way. A friend asked me if he did propose what would I do or say and honestly my first reaction was turn tail and run, because it would be so unexpected. I don't know what I'd do if it was a serious proposal. I wouldn't mind the long-distance thing until retirement actually, we're both pretty independent, and he's got land out in the country that i would loooooooove to retire on. It's just hard to tell how serious he is. Or what my reaction would be, he's such a confirmed bachelor, even the 18-year relationship he had with his childrens' mother was not a marriage, so he's never been married, while I have been, and he knows I would like another long term relationship. At our age for life would be nice (he's almost 55, I'm 49)
Last edited by Tzaphkiel; 12-17-2007 at 02:31 PM..
Reason: addition
I think that in this case, asking for your ring size just means that he likes you enough to start buying you jewelry. Maybe at some point, he will ask you for your clothing and shoes size too. No one wants to give a gift that doesn't fit the recipient. Rings can be resized later on, but knowing your ring size first is just making sure the fit is right. Otherwise, there is really no easy or subtle way to find out someone's ring size without outright asking or taking a piece of your jewelry and showing it to a jeweler.
I'm sure that now that he knows your ring size, he will keep it written down somewhere for future reference.
looks like he's serious, he's been calling every day with "i love you sweetie" and now I'm panicking because I don't know what to do! I'd sort of written it off as no long term potential and now it's changing! Help!
Talk about a shock / surprise over the weekend. He asked me for my ring size, does this mean it's an engagement ring, or a gift ring, or what??? He said he saw a ring he is thinking about giving me (turquoise inlay with a diamond) that he really likes. Now this is someone that we dated for awhile when we lived in the same town, then he moved and I moved and we've kept in touch but only see each other 2-3 times a year. It's been 3 years since we met and 2 1/2 years since we lived in the same town, so at best it's been a long-distance relationship and just wasn't working for either of us.
Last I heard, we do talk regularly every week or so, he was meeting other people, going on dinner dates. That's why it's such a shock the whole ring thing! And my understanding was that we kept in touch because we like each other and if we were ever to live close by again we might hook up and we didn't want to lose track of each other!
Now he has never given me any gifts before, so this is way out of character for him. Even if it is the holiday season, and my birthday is the same month as his daughter's around this time.
What's your take on this???? It's just such a shock! The few times I have broached getting more serious, when we were going hot and heavy, he backs way, waaaaaaaaay off, so I just let it go and figured it's a ex-lovers keeping in touch because we still like each other, but nothing more than that. Oh and he's also saying things these past few phone conversations like, "You'd make a really good wife" and enumerates my fine qualities in that regard. Again, is he just being supportive of me, or is he sending out signals of another kind????
Your input is much appreciated and welcome.....thanks in advance!!!
I don't believe anyone can read his mind...you will have to wait until he give it to him and communicate to him what you have said here...be honest, be forthright and most of all, leave no stone unturned....ask questions....and then together decide.
Hugs and good luck
Creme
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