My cousin signed me up to Match (guy, older, family)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Wow. Every post you make about this mess of a man you date completely discounts any advice or comment you make on this board.
Men file for divorce too, you know. The fact that you would think a divorced man is worse than an alcoholic who won't seek help is really messed up. I don't know whether to pity you or feel ashamed for you.
And as someone who was born and raised Catholic, I'm calling BS on the Catholicism excuse. That's a bunch of pre-Vatican II crap that your spewing, and it barely applies today.
You can't marry someone in the church without an annulment. I hope that never changes.
You never know.. My friend's brother secretly started an account for her with her picture, and her now current husband was a set-up from e-harmony from the brother... funny thing is, her husband's sister-in-law set up her now husband's account, and he didn't know. Both the sister-in-law and brother were communicating with each other and set the two on a blind date. The brother was Gay btw, and the sister-in-law, happily married- both pretending to be two totally different people and it all worked out! They have a BEAUTIFUL daughter together, and are soo compatible. One of the cutest couples.
Your cousin feels concerned about your safety. What she's probably saying is a single dad without drinking problems is probably going to be more reliable than a guy w/o kids and loves his booze too much.
She omitted it because she figured I could just tell the guys but she said it sounds more positive. Honestly I'm not interested in online dating because of the losers.
Yes an alcoholic without kids trumps a man even with older kids. Just because his kids are grown doesn't mean he's still not supporting them or the ex. Not to mention no wedding for me and I will not be able to teach catechism.
Alcoholics will drag down everyone around them. They ruin their spouses financially, they ruin family functions, they make everyone miserable around them. THey make bad husbands, bad wives, bad parents. The need for drink trumps everything else. Some even become violent. I have never known of anyone happy about being with an alcoholic. That does not mean alcoholic people are not good people, nice people etc when they are sober. A lot of them are good people, but when they drink that changes. Have you considered asking him to go to get help?? AA is an obvious choice, but there are lots of treatment programs. I am a protestant so I don't know Catholic church teachings well, but I bet they don't support a life of drunkenness. Alcoholism is a disease, and it is one that could ruin both your lives if it is not brought under control. Good luck and God bless.
You can't marry someone in the church without an annulment. I hope that never changes.
So if you meet someone who is divorced and get to that point, they will get an anullment. BFD.
Using your own brand of warped logic, at least someone who is divorced once was able to attract someone enough to marry her. That's more than you can say for a 50 year old man who never married.
All of this reads to me like a teenage girl who's mom is trying to tell her a boy isn't right for her. "BUT NO! You don't understand!"
IDDY - In June 2015, I am marrying my partner of the last four years. He has been divorced for four years, legally separated for the year prior to that per our state laws. I find it funny that you are stating that my fiancé is not a decent man because no woman would dump a decent man. He was a father for about nineteen days when his son passed away from CDH and three weeks later, he was sent to Iraq. His divorce occurred because his ex-wife was cheating on him and got pregnant with another man's baby while he was serving in Iraq! He dumped HER! She wanted him to take care of her and new baby, because the man who got her pregnant was 24, had five other kids from five other women, and didn't even have a GED. My fiancé is a stand up guy. Completed six years as a US Army paratrooper, honorably discharged. In school to become a physician's assistant. A man of integrity and respect, who can't marry in your church.... but I'm A-Okay with that, because I would marry this man at a JOP wearing jeans and a t-shirt. That's what it feels like when you meet the right guy.
To state - "I meet so many losers on OLD!" is nuts because right now - you are dating a loser who lives with his mother!
And you're delusional to think that marriage should enter into this picture at all. Not just because of Taco Man's many issues, but also because of yours. Marriage is about a partnership. In the relationship, there could be times where you make more than your partner and times when your partner makes more than you do. To believe that you are "expected to contribute to their children" is a way of nickel and diming how you look at partnership. Seems to me like you love this guy because you can get married in your church and you really, really, really want to have a church wedding. A wedding is not a marriage.
IMO Directly, Straightly and Bluntly as a friend :
You love him almost as much as (not admitting or realizing this) hating him but your love is blinding you to all this as well as you're compromising wrongly.
If you marry him it'll become a marriage of having bodies (his Mom as well in a matter of speaking) next to you (conscious or unconscious) and not much if at all good else if you don't get hurt in the process/"bargain".
This relationship has red flags all over it from where I'm sitting.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
My fiancé is a stand up guy. Completed six years as a US Army paratrooper, honorably discharged. In school to become a physician's assistant. A man of integrity and respect, who can't marry in your church.... but I'm A-Okay with that, because I would marry this man at a JOP wearing jeans and a t-shirt. That's what it feels like when you meet the right guy.
: