Boyfriend is Obsessed With His Cat (man, conversation, boys, like)
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At any rate, the cat was there before you, the cat will be there after you. If you can't accept Josh and his cat as they are, then you need to find someone more compatible.
I need advice. I have been in a relationship for several months with "Josh." In my opinion Josh has a problem - he is obsessed with his cat "Scooter."
We usually hang out at his place on the weekends (we work in different towns). On the weekends he does the following:
- Constantly calls the cat pet names - "Big boy!" "My buddy!" "My little man!"
- Includes the cat in our conversations, all the time - "Isn't that right, Scooter?" "Isn't that cool Scooter?" "Scooter, should we order pizza tonight?"
- If the cat meows during the night he jumps up to make sure his "baby" is ok and invents problems the cat has during the night. - "He didn't like how his food was laid out."
- I think he gives more affection to the cat than he does to me sometimes.
- He allows the cat to eat directly from his plate during meals and, worst of all, shares drinks with the cat and drinks after the cat (and then expects to kiss me.)
When we are apart during the week and talk on the phone:
- He includes Scooter in our phone conversations by asking him questions
- He puts Scooter up to the phone and tells him to talk to me
- Often needs to get off the phone to tend to the cat's needs
I have asked Josh to stop some of this behavior, particularly including the cat in our conversations and eating and drinking with the cat. He has failed to take me seriously and continues his behavior.
Besides all this, Josh is a sweet, smart, caring normal guy. And he clearly loves animals which is a great quality. I love them too and have a cat and dog of my own. But I don't know if I can put up with the cat obsession much longer. Or am I wrong and this is normal?
Should I continue trying to talk to him or just end the relationship? If his relationship with Scooter in this manner makes him happy perhaps I should just walk away.
I think a major question is: How long was he single before he met you? When most people are single for a long time, if they have animals or a hobby that they love to do, you will have a hard time intercepting that.
I agree. And that is what Scooter probably needs. In the meantime, it's time for me to leave the relationship. The cat was there first and I'm not going to try to change anything anymore.
He was single 3 months before he met me. He had dated a girl for about a month before that. In-between us apparently another girl met Scooter and witnessed their interactions and he never heard from her again.
Wait, so you are going to leave a guy you like because of his cat??!!! Jeez, why is it sooooo easy for women to kick a relationship to a curb? I wish I could do that but im human. LOL
Hunterseat - I will do that. I care for this guy and I don't want to surprise him with this. I don't want to do this but I have to.
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