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Obviously I am not going to tell someone on a date that I've never kissed. But people talk about these things sometimes, and it could come up. What am I supposed to say? People think it's a "red flag" if a 31 year old woman has never been with anyone. I feel like dating is a waste of my time, who wants a 31 year old woman with no experience? Everything I read says that a woman like me has no hope. Nobody wants someone my age with no experience.
I'm not even going to feel like dating for a long time because my crush is going to break my heart and I don't feel like doing anything after that.
No hope? That's ridiculous! The world is your oyster. You can do whatever you choose.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,937 posts, read 36,951,955 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Petunia 100
In time, sure. Right out of the gate? Nope.
But then, I am a fairly private person. On an anonymous message board, sure, I let it all hang out. But in real life, I am very choosy about whom I care to share personal info with.
And I am talking personal. Not my hobbies, not what I like to read, not that stuff.
Yeah, we wouldn't be a match! If a date is comprised of what authors we like, bands we've seen and how we spend our weekends.... Yaaaawn, goodnight!
The good dates are the realest. Get down to the nitty gritty. The life experiences that have shaped us. Politics. Religions. Dating experiences. The major stuff. That makes for great early dates. You really get to know the other person and potentially connect.
But I'm sure lots of people feel like you. Probably the majority. It just shows that there is no one way to do it.
People don't WANT to date a 31 year old woman with no relationship experience. They think I don't know what I want, that I'll be clingy, that there must be something wrong with me.
I wonder why I would even date--once it comes up that I've never had a relationship, things would be over anyway.
Yeah, we wouldn't be a match! If a date is comprised of what authors we like, bands we've seen and how we spend our weekends.... Yaaaawn, goodnight!
The good dates are the realest. Get down to the nitty gritty. The life experiences that have shaped us. Politics. Religions. Dating experiences. The major stuff. That makes for great early dates. You really get to know the other person and potentially connect.
But I'm sure lots of people feel like you. Probably the majority. It just shows that there is no one way to do it.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,937 posts, read 36,951,955 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by masmartbottom
I haven't had any dates. I've never been on a date.
But dating doesn't equal the physical stuff I want to do. Dates are just meeting a person at whatever place or time to talk and feel awkward.
People don't kiss on a first date, which is why I could go on 500 first dates and be as unkissed as if I'd gone on none.
So you can't know you hate dating. You have no experience in it, so you have no idea what you're talking about.
And people don't kiss on a first date? Since when? If the date goes well it generally ends up in some kissing. I made out with the last several people I dated on the first date. Sometimes there was more than kissing.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Djuna
Oh you would be shocked what some people do on the first date.
I'm more shocked at what they don't do.
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