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He's not in love with you, that much should be obvious. Pay attention to actions, not words, OP. Plus, he's a manipulative jerk. So yes, cut him off, and make it stick. If he says he's suicidal, tell him to call a hotline.
How should she show empathy? By advising the OP to stay with a guy who is an alcoholic and manipulative? He needs help and his obsession with the OP is disturbing. No one should be coerced to stay in a relationship because the other person threatens to hurt themselves.
I like the suggestion to call 911 if he does it. That gets him appropriate medical attention.
I tried breaking it off with him, but he threatened suicide, and showed up at my house drinking a whole fifth of vodka because he was trying to "kill himself", because he can't deal with me not being in his life.
So, I have been dating this guy. I didn't want to push the "relationship" label because he hasn't taken me out on a proper date. All we do is go to bars, and he'll pay for drinks, but I can tell he is really selfish because when he buys stuff, it's for him. He never took me out to eat, he never wants to go anywhere but bars, and it's not even fun, cool bars. It's scuzzy, old people bars.
He claims how much he is in love with me, how he's going to marry me, have babies with me, etc. I tried breaking it off with him, but he threatened suicide, and showed up at my house drinking a whole fifth of vodka because he was trying to "kill himself", because he can't deal with me not being in his life. The only reason why I broke it off is because he mentioned his ex Lizzy, and wanted all of us to hang out, and he spoke highly of her, so I didn't feel comfortable with it. He kept bringing her up though, knowing it's a touchy subject for me, so that's when I was like "we're done. If you want to be with her, be with her then. Don't toy me around." He claims she is a longtime friend , and they tried the dating thing, but it didn't work out. He claims he would only be friends with her, and he loves me too much. He always says I am the "one", his "soulmate", his "everything" etc etc.
He kept making suicide threats when I broke it off with him, so out of pity I guess, I took him back. He is really loving, but he doesn't do the normal boyfriend things, that I feel he should do. He has yet to take me anywhere other than a bar. He has yet to buy me anything. I didn't have sex with him yet, but it's because I am weary of him.
What should I do? Break it off for good? I'm sorry, but my attitude is, if you are going to be my boyfriend, and you are sooo "in love" with me, then you have to play the part. Take me out, and show me a good time. I suggested that to him, and he just says "Ok", but never actually does it. He is a trucker so he makes like $1200 a week, so he makes more than enough to do a lot of things. I need people's opinions, because he also brought up Lizzy again when he knows that she was the reason I broke it off with him. He says he was just trying to be"honest", and tell me that she's "hitting him up" cause we are together, and it's "only right". I don't know how to take him because he says all the right things to me, and is super in love with me, yet he doesn't court me around, or do anything with me besides going to a bar, and he buys himself things he needs, or wants, but not me. Tell me your thoughts. Thanks.
At the very least, he's immature and selfish. You deserve better.
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