Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Forgive me if there is already a thread like this, I did try to search around and didn't find anything.
Honestly, I only dabble in online dating, and by that I mean I look at POF and find about 98/100 guys that I think are either ugly, not my type, too good looking for me, too fit for me, etc., etc.
So yesterday, I actually messaged two guys, and I have done this is in the past as well. And here's what happened, and always happens.
Guy #1: Start a conversation with him. Wonder if I'm saying the right thing. I kind of treat him like I know him already by asking how he likes the weather (is that too cheesy, boring, stupid??? I don't know!) (however, it was raining yesterday and we are in CALIFORNIA, where Folsom Lake is now Folsom Valley!!)But I digress. So we exchange couple get to know you questions back and forth and then he just stops talking to me. Maybe I said something he didn't like?? I really didn't get to say a whole lot at all. - ????
Guy #2: Start conversation, exchange couple pleasantries, and then he breaks out with, "Send me your address please." WTF??????? What is that crazy crap about???
Makes me just want to throw in the towel for another 6 months!
Do you literally have to get through several of these types of guys to get to your prince???
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by aneye4detail
Do you literally have to get through several of these types of guys to get to your prince???
No, you have realize there is no prince out there. Just real people.
And you need to get off the cesspool known as POF.
And then it takes time. I have a good friend (who is a babe mind you, but the "dreaded" single mom") who married this past July the first guy she had a date with on OKC. Others look for years and never find the right person, but have fun socializing and dating.
OLD isn't an instant fix, and a sample pool of two is nothing. Come back after this has happened with 20 or so people.
Forgive me if there is already a thread like this, I did try to search around and didn't find anything.
Honestly, I only dabble in online dating, and by that I mean I look at POF and find about 98/100 guys that I think are either ugly, not my type, too good looking for me, too fit for me, etc., etc.
So yesterday, I actually messaged two guys, and I have done this is in the past as well. And here's what happened, and always happens.
Guy #1: Start a conversation with him. Wonder if I'm saying the right thing. I kind of treat him like I know him already by asking how he likes the weather (is that too cheesy, boring, stupid??? I don't know!) (however, it was raining yesterday and we are in CALIFORNIA, where Folsom Lake is now Folsom Valley!!)But I digress. So we exchange couple get to know you questions back and forth and then he just stops talking to me. Maybe I said something he didn't like?? I really didn't get to say a whole lot at all. - ????
Guy #2: Start conversation, exchange couple pleasantries, and then he breaks out with, "Send me your address please." WTF??????? What is that crazy crap about???
Makes me just want to throw in the towel for another 6 months!
Do you literally have to get through several of these types of guys to get to your prince???
Online dating is a nightmare, ESPECIALLY once you cross 40. I got divorced at 40 and it was downhill fro there in the dating world for me. Honestly, with Match.com, I make a game of it because I always know I'll get the 6 month guarantee. So work hard for 6 months and then take the next 6 months off. Sad, really.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlguy39
Online dating is a nightmare, ESPECIALLY once you cross 40. I got divorced at 40 and it was downhill fro there in the dating world for me. Honestly, with Match.com, I make a game of it because I always know I'll get the 6 month guarantee. So work hard for 6 months and then take the next 6 months off. Sad, really.
I found OLD to really improve (as a guy) around 38 or so. But it is good to take breaks.
And dating went downhill since the divorce? Uhhhh, hopefully you weren't dating while you were married, so that doesn't make sense.
Forgive me if there is already a thread like this, I did try to search around and didn't find anything.
Honestly, I only dabble in online dating, and by that I mean I look at POF and find about 98/100 guys that I think are either ugly, not my type, too good looking for me, too fit for me, etc., etc.
So yesterday, I actually messaged two guys, and I have done this is in the past as well. And here's what happened, and always happens.
Guy #1: Start a conversation with him. Wonder if I'm saying the right thing. I kind of treat him like I know him already by asking how he likes the weather (is that too cheesy, boring, stupid??? I don't know!) (however, it was raining yesterday and we are in CALIFORNIA, where Folsom Lake is now Folsom Valley!!)But I digress. So we exchange couple get to know you questions back and forth and then he just stops talking to me. Maybe I said something he didn't like?? I really didn't get to say a whole lot at all. - ????
Guy #2: Start conversation, exchange couple pleasantries, and then he breaks out with, "Send me your address please." WTF??????? What is that crazy crap about???
Makes me just want to throw in the towel for another 6 months!
Do you literally have to get through several of these types of guys to get to your prince???
Could be POF ? Or, your profile and photo sends out the wrong message. Could be??
I thought online dating would be easier for women. For men it's awful when you're not tall, rich and handsome.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by UnaWilde
Could be POF ? Or, your profile and photo sends out the wrong message. Could be??
I thought online dating would be easier for women. For men it's awful when you're not tall, rich and handsome.
Man, nothing could be further from the truth. I see the in boxes of some of my female friends. 20, 30, 40 messages in a row all saying nothing from guys 10 years younger or 10 years older, and on the rare occasion they get a real message the profiles are boring as sin and from someone an hour a way.
As a average or below average looking guy, who earns crap for a high COL area (Boston now), I get many more dates than a lot of the cute women I know.
It's really jaw droppingly bad how many bad / useless messages they get not worthy of acknowledgement. Which is why I encourage them to write the guys they want to meet and not be passive.
I found OLD to really improve (as a guy) around 38 or so. But it is good to take breaks.
And dating went downhill since the divorce? Uhhhh, hopefully you weren't dating while you were married, so that doesn't make sense.
No, I meant my dating life was great in my 20's and 30's pre-marriage. I was with her for 7 years and divorced at 40, and didn't know how to date anymore. Plus, being 40 (my point) makes it harder because women online in their 30's have a 39 year old cut off in their search. Anyway, should have been more specific on that point. COngrats on your experience being different. You probably don't have the same goals as I (still wanting to have a family).
Man, nothing could be further from the truth. I see the in boxes of some of my female friends. 20, 30, 40 messages in a row all saying nothing from guys 10 years younger or 10 years older, and on the rare occasion they get a real message the profiles are boring as sin and from someone an hour a way.
As a average or below average looking guy, who earns crap for a high COL area (Boston now), I get many more dates than a lot of the cute women I know.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,936 posts, read 36,981,862 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Atlguy39
No, I meant my dating life was great in my 20's and 30's pre-marriage. I was with her for 7 years and divorced at 40, and didn't know how to date anymore. Plus, being 40 (my point) makes it harder because women online in their 30's have a 39 year old cut off in their search. Anyway, should have been more specific on that point. COngrats on your experience being different. You probably don't have the same goals as I (still wanting to have a family).
There are people I wanted to have a family with (last woman I dated included), but I don't date to find a mother of non existent children, I date to meet awesome women, make connections, and hopefully fall in love. People dating to find a parent of children that don't exist certainly turn off most people, both male and female, even those open to having children.
But I also don't see what you see with the age thing. I'm 44 now and I get messaged by mostly women 34-37 or so, which isn't ideal. Definitely haven't had issue with being too old for a 38 yo.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
..
