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Hey guys, long story short I got invovled with this woman who we really connected with, explosive chemistry and hit it off fast/strong who tears me down and is married but I cant cut her off.
There were some weird things at beginning like I couldn't call her, but I just tried to not stay attached. Anyway, as time went on it got more serious, and I eventually found out she is in fact still married (had told me she had 'an ex' and that there was some child custody going on), anyway no actual progress of a divorce or anything.
To add to this, wheter intentionally or not, I felt terrible everything we talked, she would tear me down and build herself up on every little thing. She works at a big hospital er and sometimes rides helicopters to do trauma calls in remote areas, so pretty cool, but literally every time we'd talk (this is long distance relationship) I would tell her something (my job by contrast is a lot more slow paced/ 'boring') she wouldnt really care and then 'oh, guess what I got to fly to the top of a mountain today to save someone bleeding out!"
No joke I became super super depressed. Somehow I found the strength to cut her loose, and did for about 3 months until we ran into each other, she cried for hours about how sorry she was, how this is real, how she loves me, how her situation is complicated and is going it for the kids etc etc.
I actually on some level do think her marriage is loveless/sexless, and that she DOES care about me, but the problem is I feel sooo horrendously bad when I am involved with her (possibly my own problems? I can admit that), a major thing is the inferiority I feel towards her that she is a big helicopter rescue woman and I work in an office. This mixed with the hidden nature of what our relationship was makes it obvivous she has to go...yet on some level her brainwashing got me good. I think 'what if I am the worthless one?' or 'some attention is better than no attention' etc.
I can be having a great day, and then I'll get a text or voicemail from her about some backdoor brag or something 'had a big funeral for a cop today, we came in on our helicopter' and it tanks my mood.
What do I do? I still have some level of addiction towards her!
Aside from the fact that she's married and never told you about it, isn't the person you want to be with supposed to make you feel good/happy when you are around them?
Wow. I've been with alot of married women and the never kept it a secret since they seemed to get off on the fact that they were married and cheating and that was part of the excitement to them.
Hey guys, long story short I got invovled with this woman who we really connected with, explosive chemistry and hit it off fast/strong who tears me down and is married but I cant cut her off.
There were some weird things at beginning like I couldn't call her, but I just tried to not stay attached. Anyway, as time went on it got more serious, and I eventually found out she is in fact still married (had told me she had 'an ex' and that there was some child custody going on), anyway no actual progress of a divorce or anything.
To add to this, wheter intentionally or not, I felt terrible everything we talked, she would tear me down and build herself up on every little thing. She works at a big hospital er and sometimes rides helicopters to do trauma calls in remote areas, so pretty cool, but literally every time we'd talk (this is long distance relationship) I would tell her something (my job by contrast is a lot more slow paced/ 'boring') she wouldnt really care and then 'oh, guess what I got to fly to the top of a mountain today to save someone bleeding out!"
No joke I became super super depressed. Somehow I found the strength to cut her loose, and did for about 3 months until we ran into each other, she cried for hours about how sorry she was, how this is real, how she loves me, how her situation is complicated and is going it for the kids etc etc.
I actually on some level do think her marriage is loveless/sexless, and that she DOES care about me, but the problem is I feel sooo horrendously bad when I am involved with her (possibly my own problems? I can admit that), a major thing is the inferiority I feel towards her that she is a big helicopter rescue woman and I work in an office. This mixed with the hidden nature of what our relationship was makes it obvivous she has to go...yet on some level her brainwashing got me good. I think 'what if I am the worthless one?' or 'some attention is better than no attention' etc.
I can be having a great day, and then I'll get a text or voicemail from her about some backdoor brag or something 'had a big funeral for a cop today, we came in on our helicopter' and it tanks my mood.
What do I do? I still have some level of addiction towards her!
Isn't that AWESOME when the woman talks about her 'ex' only to find out she's still married?! That is sarcasm.
I've now had the pleasure of this happening to me twice. I find it a bit strange when they do that.
Dude SHE'S MARRIED!
In my book that means off limits! She better figure out what she's doing and get back with me later if this is me.
Does her 'its loveless and just for the kids' matter at all? She claims her husband is crazy and will declare bankruptcy to hurt the kids and that's why she is staying with him.
Does her 'its loveless and just for the kids' matter at all? She claims her husband is crazy and will declare bankruptcy to hurt the kids and that's why she is staying with him.
If I had a dollar for every time a guy has told me "but my wife just doesn't understand me"...
If you're happy being used like this, then by all means, continue on.
Does her 'its loveless and just for the kids' matter at all? She claims her husband is crazy and will declare bankruptcy to hurt the kids and that's why she is staying with him.
"It's loveless and just staying for the kids" are justifications #1 and #2 for cheaters. Why on earth would you want to put up with that, even if her bedroom skills are awesome? And for the record, I can guar-on-tee that it's NOT sexless and that YOU are getting sloppy seconds. So if you enjoy having secondhand sex with someone who tears down your self-esteem and ruins your good mood on a consistent basis, you've met your "match".
Does her 'its loveless and just for the kids' matter at all? She claims her husband is crazy and will declare bankruptcy to hurt the kids and that's why she is staying with him.
You're getting used like a dirty tampon. Drop her and forget all about her. You're most likely not the first one she has done this to.
Run don't walk out of this mess. Why would you even bother staying with this narcissist? She's only a big deal in her own head. Could be telling you one lie after another and how would you know.
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