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So we just moved to a new house. We have spent the last week or so cleaning, packing, moving, cleaning and unpacking.
I just started taking night classes x3 nights a week - so on these days im up from 6 and dont get into bed around 11 - and thats if i go STRAIGHT to sleep when I get home.
We are planning a wedding (coming up in Sept) - so there's all the fun crap associated with that...
and I AM EXHAUSTED.
I work full time, have a 7 year old daughter and im just BEAT.
I got a call from her school today that i had FORGOTTEN to fill out her permission form for her field trip.
... i didnt even know she had a field trip coming up...
I havent helped her with homework hardly at ALL this week (my fiance is the one who watches her for me while im in class, and then on the nights i DONT have school im trying to do laundry and go grocery shopping, cleaning the house, studying and trying to still have time to go for a walk or find time to spend with my daughter and finace)
but its like its not ENOUGH. I never get through the laundry, or the dishes. It never seems like I have enough time to spend with my daughter or fiance.
I dont know how to manage my time to get everything done, and im starting to feel like a MAJOR slacker/screw up as a mother and a partner because of it.
Make sure your finance is doing his share, you can't carry the load all on your own. He should be helping with things like cleaning the house, dinner etc. Equal partnership right!?
He has never (before us) had to be in the spot to be a father figure. 100% bachelor. We have been dating for 3 years, living together for 2 and slowly but surely he has started picking up more 'dad' jobs. like helping her with her homework and making her dinner etc.
I just feel like a dick being like "ok - here is MY kid - i know you are already picking her up from school and helping her with homework and feeding her and playing with her and tucking her in - but i ALSO need you to do some laundry and vacuum upstairs and and and..."... I dont want to overwhelm the poor guy!
as for night classes - that isnt an option. trust me - i looked into it!
I think a lot of times we (meaning women) are our own worst critics.
OP, you've obviously got a lot going on and of course you're exhausted. But where does this "slacker" stuff come from?
Have you spoken to your fiance about it? Not just from a "I'd really appreciate your help" perspective, but letting him know how you truly are feeling? Would it help you to get reassurance from him?
I just feel like a dick being like "ok - here is MY kid - i know you are already picking her up from school and helping her with homework and feeding her and playing with her and tucking her in - but i ALSO need you to do some laundry and vacuum upstairs and and and..."... I dont want to overwhelm the poor guy!
Step back a minute. Has he told you that he's overwhelmed, or are you projecting your own feelings on him?
It sounds like you need to cut yourself some slack. Guess what's going to happen if you DON'T vacuum upstairs? NOTHING!!! Go easier on yourself - not everything must be done as it used to be done nor done as often - when you give yourself permission to be a regular human being versus Superwoman/Mom/Student/Worker, you'll find things a little easier, I think.
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