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Sometimes opposites do attract. Think: 1960s original, bra burning feminist, hope-to-die liberal and hippie Buddhist marrying 1960s combat veteran, former state narcotics agent, comparative conservative and Roman Catholic.
So far it's worked for my wife and me through five years of friendship followed by 20 years of marriage.
+1. Not that it's without the occasional challenge, but we drag each other kicking and screaming out of our respective comfort zones.
My biggest mistake was staying with my ex when there were plenty of signs that I was more serious about the relationship and where it was going then he was. They were subtle signs so I chose to ignore them when I should have broken up with him.
1. I don't think befriending women is a mistake you made, as long as your only intent was platonic. If you are interested in a woman who doesn't reciprocate, don't accept her friendship as a consolation prize, you will only hurt yourself.
2. Every man walking the earth has played the fool once. It is just your turn now, but there is life after, please believe.
1). It was platonic and I had no interest in her. She had a boyfriend who had a problem with us talking so I severed the friendship.
No need for that drama.
2). I almost married her, thank the lord above I didn't.
Now I am living on my own with me and my two dogs.
When I was young, in spite of my true nature, I had this mental map that would have led to a very mainstream, suburban, married with kids life. I obsessed about LTR potential anytime I met someone. Even in cases of LTR, I was closed minded about alternatives like DINK, boho living, etc. Getting married was probably a mistake. And even if the concept of marriage was still to be considered, I should have been more creative regarding my initial concept of it. Having such a point of view might have led to decisions more supportive of my actual strengths and needs. Silver lining - although eventually married, somewhat out of desperation ... no kids!
1). Trying to be friends with women (It has backfired)
2). Dating my ex who was once my best friend (We no longer speak)
At least you tried I would not look at it with regret. If you're still single years from now you'll be wondering what could have been, and regretting NOT dating her. There's a lot of people that say they don't date their friends. I will never understand this thinking unless there's no physical attraction. I agree though as a single guy to me it's a waste of time being friends with a woman. I don't have a problem starting out that way but there needs to be some sort of goal or open mindedness to something beyond that. Not just friends forever.
At least you tried I would not look at it with regret. If you're still single years from now you'll be wondering what could have been, and regretting NOT dating her. There's a lot of people that say they don't date their friends. I will never understand this thinking unless there's no physical attraction.
One of the biggest was when I was 13 and had a chance with this insanely beautiful girl. I think she was gonna go out with me and I must have done something to turn her off or said something. She continued to talk to me after this but "Just friends" only. I know I was young, but I felt like this, along with a few other situations is what kept me from having any success with women in my teenage years. The sad part is that less than two years later, I may or may not have had a chance with this girl again, yet I once again managed to mess it up. Not sure if I even had a chance that second time, but I certainly did that first time. Only I went around for years thinking that I blew my chances because I was ugly or cursed or something. It never occurred to me until adulthood that I turned her off after she was already attracted to me.
I could go on and on with too many other things over the years, but don't have the time.
One of the biggest was when I was 13 and had a chance with this insanely beautiful girl. I think she was gonna go out with me and I must have done something to turn her off or said something. She continued to talk to me after this but "Just friends" only. I know I was young, but I felt like this, along with a few other situations is what kept me from having any success with women in my teenage years. The sad part is that less than two years later, I may or may not have had a chance with this girl again, yet I once again managed to mess it up. Not sure if I even had a chance that second time, but I certainly did that first time. Only I went around for years thinking that I blew my chances because I was ugly or cursed or something. It never occurred to me until adulthood that I turned her off after she was already attracted to me.
I could go on and on with too many other things over the years, but don't have the time.
Oh man, your story is almost identical to mine.
Back when I was 13 (about a month or so into the start of 8th grade), I had noticed that one of the hottest girls at my middle school seemed to be into me (or at least had a crush on me). I had caught her staring at me in the auditorium, cafeteria, hallway, etc. When I noticed, she seemed to smile and look away from what I can recall.
Then one day, as I was in my locker getting my things to go home, it just so happens that I see her, and she's coming to approach me (we were the only 2 in the hallway that I can recall) and she said with a small smile "Hi, my name's Allison." I don't recall exactly what I said afterwards, but it was definitely brief, then I took my things and left. Literally the day after, I had sort of realized that I'd blown it, and tried to get her to talk to me the rest of year, but had no luck. She must have gotten upset for thinking that I blew her off that moment, and her attraction level must have decreased for good.
I kick myself big time till this day for blowing that kind of opportunity...lol
Back when I was 13 (about a month or so into the start of 8th grade), I had noticed that one of the hottest girls at my middle school seemed to be into me (or at least had a crush on me). I had caught her staring at me in the auditorium, cafeteria, hallway, etc. When I noticed, she seemed to smile and look away from what I can recall.
Then one day, as I was in my locker getting my things to go home, it just so happens that I see her, and she's coming to approach me (we were the only 2 in the hallway that I can recall) and she said with a small smile "Hi, my name's Allison." I don't recall exactly what I said afterwards, but it was definitely brief, then I took my things and left. Literally the day after, I had sort of realized that I'd blown it, and tried to get her to talk to me the rest of year, but had no luck. She must have gotten upset for thinking that I blew her off that moment, and her attraction level must have decreased for good.
I kick myself big time till this day for blowing that kind of opportunity...lol
Definitely very similar, as this was a few weeks after the start of 8th grade. She was new that year, but it turned out that she had lived in my town before and went to school there. It was before I had moved there though, so I didn't know her before this. But some friends of mine at school did, the ones who had lived there for a while.
We actually talked on the phone, which is another example of my ''Don't talk on the phone TOO MUCH early in the dating phase or before you have even yet had a first date with someone'' and talked for a handful of hours, pretty much two or three nights in a row. She told me she liked me and that I was the best looking boy in our school. Then we hung out one night, I acted very strange probably. I likely didn't even realize I was doing anything wrong. She kissed me at the end of the night, just on the cheek. Then she told me she kissed her friends like that all the time and it meant nothing. The next day, she told me she didn't like me like that LOL. And then she started going out with some guy that I was kind of friendly with. I continued talking on the phone with her whenever I could, thinking she might like me after dumping him.
That was exactly 20 years ago haha.
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