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Hello so my boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 months now, he is quite older than me (he is 46) I am 29, he has been so good to me and everything, but this week, he messaged me Monday and Tuesday, but on Wednesday,and half of Thursday no message from him, on Thursday he messaged me at 9:15 pm at night saying ”gorgeous,I have been thinking about you” and I replied an hour later”hi baby,how have you been? and on Friday still not reply from him, the ticks of Whatsapp remained grey, like as if he has not seen the message, this is all seemed very weird, he always messages me at least something. or sends me a video or whatever, he told me the past Sunday(the 15th) that this week he was going to be very busy or so I have heard.he replied back at 12:00 AM Saturday, I went to his house and saw his car there an everything, nothing suspicious.
The point is that He, texted me yesterday morning (Saturday) He seemed fine, he tells me that he was super busy this past week, and explains how his week was so busy and told me that today he was finishing an inspection report, and that he was going to an event and he did not know at what time he was coming back. minutes later, he tells me that he could come and pick me up at 7:00pm and if it was alright with me. And i replied “ok but don't come so late ” he replied.“ ok beautiful , thanks. An hour later he sends me another message saying: I was wrong gorgeous, it’s tomorrow when i am super busy ( he’s referring to tomorrow as for TODAY Sunday). So i don’t understand what is all this back and forth, is he tormented from all the work,or what?./ what do you understand from all of this? Is he putting up excuses or is he meaning what he is saying and being truthful.
Yesterday we went out and I asked him what the event was he said a polo event, but he did not give any details he just said: Polo an did not ask more. so yesterday when he dropped me off at my house, I just told him can we go out tomorrow, he said lets see, I will text you,'' cause I have a lot of things to finish to give to my boss on Monday plus I want to see some house (cause he wants to purchase a house, for him, for us ,cause I will move in as well) So I told him ( we were talking on the phone ) '' listen a relationship is not going to work like that, we have to spend weekends together and if I have a week day off we can also see each other. he said'' your are right babe an I want to dedicate weekends for you, I know I have to organize myself more, I have been a little chaotic'' he also told me that he was not going to the event ''anymore'' even though he wanted to go.
I said to him:'' Listen focus on your priority which is the work that you have to finish,and also look at some homes. I will go out with a girlfriend that has been texting me since this morning to go to the beach, so I am going to go out with her an enjoy my day. he kinda of stayed quiet, and said to me: oh next weekend I want to take you to the beach,,and then asks me ok so which days do you have free,or what weekdays and I said to him, I have weekends off Saturday and Sunday, I don't know which weekdays I have off, I feel as if he also wants or is insisting to see me on weekdays, but I don't accept that because Normal people that are going out see each other on weekends. THE QUESTION IS CAN HE HAVE SOMETHING ELSE GOING ON AND OBVIOUSLY HE WONT TELL ME? He seemed sincere, but still you can never be sure.I feel as if he has too much baggage,stress and work.
he replied back at 12:00 AM Saturday, I went to his house and saw his car there an everything, nothing suspicious.
So you get a text after midnight and drive past his house to make sure he was home? That's what my GF's and I did in high school--drive past a guy's house to see if he was home.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Love_wingsxo
TSo I told him ( we were talking on the phone ) '' listen a relationship is not going to work like that, we have to spend weekends together and if I have a week day off we can also see each other. he said'' your are right babe an I want to dedicate weekends for you.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Love_wingsxo
and said to me: oh next weekend I want to take you to the beach,,and then asks me ok so which days do you have free,or what weekdays and I said to him, I have weekends off Saturday and Sunday, I don't know which weekdays I have off, I feel as if he also wants or is insisting to see me on weekdays, but I don't accept that because Normal people that are going out see each other on weekends. THE QUESTION IS CAN HE HAVE SOMETHING ELSE GOING ON AND OBVIOUSLY HE WONT TELL ME? He seemed sincere, but still you can never be sure.I feel as if he has too much baggage,stress and work.
So he tries to make plans to do what you asked him to do, spend weekends and weekdays you have off together, and you don't accept that?
I think you are wrong here and the one that has baggage, stress and work.
BTW--I'm guessing he's some kind of home inspector. This is the very busy Spring selling season in many places. Inspectors, appraisers, lenders. and realtors tend to be very busy during this time period.
It sounds suspicious but that could just be the way you're telling the story. He may really be busy with work. Or he might have someone on the side. You'll probably need to wait this out and see if the odd behavior continues.
Even if it's just work and you can't seem to get it through your head that he may not have the schedule "normal people" (your phrase) have, planning to move in with him at this point is just nuts.
@Hokiefan He calls me like that in text messages but in real life, by my name. nickname.
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