Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 04-22-2018, 06:15 PM
 
18 posts, read 12,693 times
Reputation: 11

Advertisements

Hello so my boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 months now, he is quite older than me (he is 46) I am 29, he has been so good to me and everything, but this week, he messaged me Monday and Tuesday, but on Wednesday,and half of Thursday no message from him, on Thursday he messaged me at 9:15 pm at night saying ”gorgeous,I have been thinking about you” and I replied an hour later”hi baby,how have you been? and on Friday still not reply from him, the ticks of Whatsapp remained grey, like as if he has not seen the message, this is all seemed very weird, he always messages me at least something. or sends me a video or whatever, he told me the past Sunday(the 15th) that this week he was going to be very busy or so I have heard.he replied back at 12:00 AM Saturday, I went to his house and saw his car there an everything, nothing suspicious.

The point is that He, texted me yesterday morning (Saturday) He seemed fine, he tells me that he was super busy this past week, and explains how his week was so busy and told me that today he was finishing an inspection report, and that he was going to an event and he did not know at what time he was coming back. minutes later, he tells me that he could come and pick me up at 7:00pm and if it was alright with me. And i replied “ok but don't come so late ” he replied.“ ok beautiful , thanks. An hour later he sends me another message saying: I was wrong gorgeous, it’s tomorrow when i am super busy ( he’s referring to tomorrow as for TODAY Sunday). So i don’t understand what is all this back and forth, is he tormented from all the work,or what?./ what do you understand from all of this? Is he putting up excuses or is he meaning what he is saying and being truthful.

Yesterday we went out and I asked him what the event was he said a polo event, but he did not give any details he just said: Polo an did not ask more. so yesterday when he dropped me off at my house, I just told him can we go out tomorrow, he said lets see, I will text you,'' cause I have a lot of things to finish to give to my boss on Monday plus I want to see some house (cause he wants to purchase a house, for him, for us ,cause I will move in as well) So I told him ( we were talking on the phone ) '' listen a relationship is not going to work like that, we have to spend weekends together and if I have a week day off we can also see each other. he said'' your are right babe an I want to dedicate weekends for you, I know I have to organize myself more, I have been a little chaotic'' he also told me that he was not going to the event ''anymore'' even though he wanted to go.

I said to him:'' Listen focus on your priority which is the work that you have to finish,and also look at some homes. I will go out with a girlfriend that has been texting me since this morning to go to the beach, so I am going to go out with her an enjoy my day. he kinda of stayed quiet, and said to me: oh next weekend I want to take you to the beach,,and then asks me ok so which days do you have free,or what weekdays and I said to him, I have weekends off Saturday and Sunday, I don't know which weekdays I have off, I feel as if he also wants or is insisting to see me on weekdays, but I don't accept that because Normal people that are going out see each other on weekends. THE QUESTION IS CAN HE HAVE SOMETHING ELSE GOING ON AND OBVIOUSLY HE WONT TELL ME? He seemed sincere, but still you can never be sure.I feel as if he has too much baggage,stress and work.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 04-22-2018, 06:24 PM
 
1,201 posts, read 804,403 times
Reputation: 3188
Sounds like he’s married.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-22-2018, 06:34 PM
 
18 posts, read 12,693 times
Reputation: 11
@OttoR He is actually divorce, was married for 10 years with a woman 12 years older than him, an in 2009 they divorced.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-22-2018, 06:51 PM
 
Location: Bloomington IN
8,590 posts, read 12,350,394 times
Reputation: 24251
Quote:
Originally Posted by Love_wingsxo View Post
he replied back at 12:00 AM Saturday, I went to his house and saw his car there an everything, nothing suspicious.
So you get a text after midnight and drive past his house to make sure he was home? That's what my GF's and I did in high school--drive past a guy's house to see if he was home.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Love_wingsxo View Post
TSo I told him ( we were talking on the phone ) '' listen a relationship is not going to work like that, we have to spend weekends together and if I have a week day off we can also see each other. he said'' your are right babe an I want to dedicate weekends for you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Love_wingsxo View Post
and said to me: oh next weekend I want to take you to the beach,,and then asks me ok so which days do you have free,or what weekdays and I said to him, I have weekends off Saturday and Sunday, I don't know which weekdays I have off, I feel as if he also wants or is insisting to see me on weekdays, but I don't accept that because Normal people that are going out see each other on weekends. THE QUESTION IS CAN HE HAVE SOMETHING ELSE GOING ON AND OBVIOUSLY HE WONT TELL ME? He seemed sincere, but still you can never be sure.I feel as if he has too much baggage,stress and work.
So he tries to make plans to do what you asked him to do, spend weekends and weekdays you have off together, and you don't accept that?

I think you are wrong here and the one that has baggage, stress and work.

BTW--I'm guessing he's some kind of home inspector. This is the very busy Spring selling season in many places. Inspectors, appraisers, lenders. and realtors tend to be very busy during this time period.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-22-2018, 06:56 PM
 
1,734 posts, read 1,203,549 times
Reputation: 9516
You've been seeing this guy for two months.

You think you're going to move in with him when he buys a house?

And he's this cagey now?

He's got something going on besides you.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-22-2018, 06:58 PM
 
Location: The ghetto
17,745 posts, read 9,202,314 times
Reputation: 13327
It sounds suspicious but that could just be the way you're telling the story. He may really be busy with work. Or he might have someone on the side. You'll probably need to wait this out and see if the odd behavior continues.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-22-2018, 06:59 PM
 
2,144 posts, read 1,879,783 times
Reputation: 10604
A man is busy with work and adult responsibilities and you're driving past his house like a stalker or a high school girl.

And...

Quote:
my boyfriend and I have been dating for 2 months now,
and
Quote:
cause he wants to purchase a house, for him, for us ,cause I will move in as well
What? You don't move in with someone after 2 months.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-22-2018, 07:00 PM
 
1,734 posts, read 1,203,549 times
Reputation: 9516
Even if it's just work and you can't seem to get it through your head that he may not have the schedule "normal people" (your phrase) have, planning to move in with him at this point is just nuts.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-22-2018, 07:06 PM
 
Location: Central Virginia
6,562 posts, read 8,396,092 times
Reputation: 18804
The fact that he addresses you primarily as "gorgeous" and "beautiful" in his text messages makes me go:

Not only is he objectifying you but it makes me wonder if he does it because it lessens the chance of calling you by another woman's name.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 04-22-2018, 07:18 PM
 
18 posts, read 12,693 times
Reputation: 11
@Hokiefan He calls me like that in text messages but in real life, by my name. nickname.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 11:12 AM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top