Struggling to Understand What He Sees In Me (women, love, attracted)
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I'm a few years younger than he is (it's ok because I like older men and I am over 18.)
He's very established in his career as he owns his own successful business of 20 years.
I will be graduating with my second Master's this May. All he knows is that I'm in school but he doesn't know that it's my second degree however, and that I have other credentials, including a newly incorporated non-profit and that I will be working on my Phd soon. I'm quite private unless asked.
He has a beautiful million dollar home and I live in an apt.
He has tons of friends. I have none. He is quite popular. I don't mind being a loner as it's my natural way. I'm ok with my own company. Always have been.
He's very well-traveled and speaks several languages. I have traveled some but not nearly as much as him.
He is very handsome and can have any woman. I don't think I'm too bad in that dept. and try to keep myself up. I take pride in my appearance.
He is very outgoing and I am painfully shy sometimes in social situations, and almost always when interacting with males.
We met some time ago at a professional education course and he came up to me when it was over and asked if we could keep in touch. I'm guessing the only thing that could have even made him look my way was my knowledge on the topic and the thoughts I shared with the group during the q&a session. He is a man of great intellect and doesn't appear to want a stupid or shallow woman by any means whatsoever.
Last week we talked on the phone mainly about educational stuff and I think I blew it. The confident woman that he met at the training was gone and the shy stuttering 12 year old girl made an appearance. I was reticent and unable to articulate. Needless to say I was so embarassed. He didn't seem to mind too much as he kept asking for us to talk again soon but I have yet to schedule another call because he just intimidates me so much.
I also did some snooping on his FB and a woman he was dealing with recently seemed to be his perfect match. She has education, her own home, and money. Something I don't have much of yet.
I don't get the sense that he's a bad guy or anything but I do sense that status and all that really matters to him and while I also do think there is some genuine interest in me, I can't get over feeling like I just don't measure up.
You feel like you don't measure up because he has 20 years of life experience on you. If you stay together, by the time you reach 40 you may feel like he doesn't measure up to you. You could very well surpass him.
You feel he is into status? You may be right. A 40 year old walking around with a pretty 20 year old on his arm is certainly one form of status. His colleagues are just as impressed as they would be if he was driving a Maybach.
The great thing for you is that he has something he can teach you. He's been on this earth 20 years longer than you have, so it would be rather odd if he didn't have anything he could teach you.
You are probably young enough to waste 5 years of your life on him. It would only prove to be a waste of years if he isn't really into you. It wouldn't really be a waste, as you can learn from him, enjoy him, and maybe even learn to love each other over that time.
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