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You won't change him. He has shown you who he is and what he's like - believe him. You need to decide if you can see yourself putting up with all this for the rest of your years, or if you want something else.
Sounds like he's desperate for attention so he talks to anyone and everyone and flirts with the ladies online and off to make himself feel good. Bleh.
One thing you have come to grips with now this that he was honest and up front about that's the way he is so the choice is yours whether to accept it or not. You cannot complain about it anymore once he tells you that and you continue seeing him.
It sounds like compulsive behavior. Compulsive behavior is a symptom of underlying emotional/psychological issues. IOW: baggage of some sort. He doesn't view it as problematic, so he's not going to seek out professional help to find out what's at the root of it, and resolve it. He thinks its ok.
I don't think this would work out for you, in a LTR. The behavior isn't going to go away, and it sounds like you're not happy living with it. So....
Interesting. Yes. He has HUGE family issues and a bit of PTSD because of it
Here is an all too common problem I read and hear about and unfortunately it's happening to me.
The good thing is that my bf is the most loving and attentive man I've been with yet.
We laugh a lot, are creative together and he wants to spend all of his free time with me.
He sees us long term together and does not want it to end.
Social media states we are "in a relationship" and he tags me in lots of pics and posts so everyone knows I'm his. So far, so good.( no it isnt)
Now the problem. He is very flirty. I don't mind that(yes you do) lots of people are flirty, but he used to take it too far and has pegged down for me. He always includes me so he is not disrespectful (yes he is) when he flirts. Hell he talks to everyone man and woman.
Gotta be honest with yourself before you can fix any relationship issues.
Gotta be honest with yourself before you can fix any relationship issues.
Thinking about it. You are right. I'm just not okay with it. He won't get help. He won't stop and it makes me very nervous. It's hard to leave because I love him, and so it's going to be extremely difficult for a year or so (the amount of time it takes to get over someone..) I honestly believe this kind of behavior leads to cheating. A friend told me it happened to her and as soon as she dumped him - he went after the other girls.
It's hard to leave because I love him, and so it's going to be extremely difficult for a year or so (the amount of time it takes to get over someone..) I honestly believe this kind of behavior leads to cheating. A friend told me it happened to her and as soon as she dumped him - he went after the other girls.
What is that "but I love him" stuff about? What is there to love? Is it a matter of, "he makes me laugh, he rubs my feet, he takes me to nice places,"? Maybe, but he disrespects you to the hilt both in public with his flirting and semi-privately via social media. Why on earth would it be difficult to get rid of someone that treats you so poorly? You dump him, he leaves and is flirting in a bar tomorrow and online and you sit home and cry over what exactly?
Thinking about it. You are right. I'm just not okay with it. He won't get help. He won't stop and it makes me very nervous. It's hard to leave because I love him, and so it's going to be extremely difficult for a year or so (the amount of time it takes to get over someone..) I honestly believe this kind of behavior leads to cheating. A friend told me it happened to her and as soon as she dumped him - he went after the other girls.
Not necessarily. There is no formula for the amount of time it takes to get over someone (although Charlotte once said on SATC that it's equal to half the time you dated). Deciding that it will take a year to get over him will be a self-fulfilling prophecy.
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