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There is a big difference between spending money and making sophisticated choices. Many people don't recognize this, and they equate price to sophistication. I'm not saying that the physical item or service itself is sophisticated or not, but that the criteria and value system that a person uses to determine what clothes they wear or restaurants they visit or media they consume determines how self-aware and complex they are.
I feel that he heart of "class" is a combination of self awareness and confidence. Maybe courage is a better word than confidence and humility is part of self awareness but for brevity's sake I will just stick to my initial word choice. Confidence without self awareness is flawed cockiness and awareness without courage/confidence makes one a follower. To me, a classy choice is one that shows confidence and awareness.
The problem with trying to impress someone with "class" in dating is that it is one of those characteristics that is in the eye of the beholder. If I am trying to impress a woman using my definition of class but her definition is based on expense, she will obviously not be impressed, and vice versa.
For many people it is easier to spend a few extra bucks on dinner than to articulate their values system in a way that is recognized and appreciated by their date, and thus it is no surprise that dating is very expensive.
Anyone who goes out to the fanciest restaurant in town for a first date is kind of an idiot.
First, that's a lot of pressure to put on your date. Second, it's bound to put the woman ill-at-ease, wondering what you're expecting in return.
What's wrong with just finding something fun to do? NOT A MOVIE. But something where you can relax, be yourself, and chit chat. A park. A beer. A friend's party.
"Anyone who goes out to the fanciest restaurant in town for a first date is kind of an idiot."
I'm an idiot I suppose. I can afford the very best independent restaurants. Why wouldn't I treat her to the best? This way, I get to eat upscale, with company. These are restaurants that are prohibitive or awkward to visit on your own. Of course, prudent profile screening is important, but, after all, it's only a date and life is just too short.
According to the article, the average cost of a date in California is above $200... That's stunning. I don't even know how to spend that much in a night without going to a $$$$ kind of restaurant. Who does that on a typical date?
The high end for me has been in the ballpark of $100... The low end is in the ballpark of $20-$40. Keep in mind this is generally for a full-day date, not a quick coffee. (I don't have any experience with online dating.)
On the other hand, I'll definitely exceed the $1600 average on dating this year. Just in the last 2-3 months since I started dating actively, I've probably spent $1000 or more. Granted, that does include spending $400 to buy a plane ticket in order to make a 10-day visit. But still.
I guess I just go on dates more than the average.
I can see that $200 easy. Movies where I live are $17 each. Let’s call it $35. Two drinks and a popcorn are $25. So that’s $60.
Let’s say you go to a typical nicer restaurant. Entrees are $25, wine is about $45. One appetizer is $12 or so. Dessert is $10.
So the dinner is about $120. Tax and tip adds about $30. Let’s call it $150.
$210 where I live and add $4 for parking at the multiplex.
If a man has the opportunity to date his DREAM GIRL (****insert the name of whatever famous beauty you wish here***) he would NOT suggest that they go out for coffee as their first date.
I do not want to be considered or treated as anything less than a guy's dream girl. If I'm not his dream girl (or on that scale for him) then he most likely will not take the time to properly invest in me (emotionally, romantically, financially, etc.). I would not want to have my time wasted or to waste his time.
I like the way you expressed this sentiment. When a potential doesn’t start with their best foot forward it doesn’t bode well for the relationship.
You want a little bit of anticipation and magic leading into the date and coffee doesn’t do it.
If a man has the opportunity to date his DREAM GIRL (****insert the name of whatever famous beauty you wish here***) he would NOT suggest that they go out for coffee as their first date.
I do not want to be considered or treated as anything less than a guy's dream girl.
No one is ANYONE'S so-called "dream girl" on a FIRST date. Seriously, get over yourself. LOL
I can see that $200 easy. Movies where I live are $17 each.
The only kind of ticket pricing that I know of that is THAT high is at an IMAX theater. The rest are typically 10 to 12 bucks per person. Never hear of such a price otherwise.
That's all I'm willing to do. Most women I've dated want instant chemistry and will refuse a second date using that cop out line. No way I'm springing for an expensive dinner on the first date.
It's virtually impossible to have instant chemistry. Our natural pheromones are being covered up by hygiene products.
Not gonna work - Most modern day American women want something more "romantic" and "original" than that
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