Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Of course - deep down I know exactly what you are saying … and of course the main problem is that I do love him, that's why Im tolerating this behavior.
But he obviously doesn't love you. Love isn't a one-way deal.
I don't care if you snooped. No way would I stick around so he can make fun of me behind my back with that heifer then come around expecting to rub up against me when he's in the mood.
Of course - deep down I know exactly what you are saying … and of course the main problem is that I do love him, that's why Im tolerating this behavior.
And since he said I am overreacting and no one should prevent other person from seeing their friends, which I completely agree - and I don't mind his other female friends, but with this one he acts differently- protective, proactive and involved already with her family.
And I really just wanted to see if its all in my head. If I am the crazy one and if any other women would tolerate that kind of behavior - or is just me - the stupid one here...
Thank you again
fr all the comments, appreciate a lot!
I think you missed the point of my post. If your overall priorities were straight, his behavior would all but extinguish your "love" for him.
Somebody might ask if you'd stop loving your children if caught them acting this way. That's about parental love, which is different from romantic love. I can't imagine that your romantic love for this person, if it actually is true romantic love, is so unconditional at this point in the relationship. Are you afraid that if you dump him, you might not find anybody else? If not, then what about him do you love so much that you believe it outshines his horrible treatment of others?
Speaking of them stringing suckers along, are you positive you aren't one of their suckers?
I obviously have an issue of letting someone go - especially if I love the person. But since he is not my first boyfriend I did this already in the past. Im confident I can get someone else.
The only thing that is keeping me close to him:that he has 2 faces. One - the person he is when he is with her - or when he returns from her. And then the other face - where he is the most sweetest, attentive, nicest, loving and caring person I ever had or met.
Only when he is around her he becomes protective over her, and looks like she is the most important woman in his life.
And this is why I struggle so much. Otherwise I would have kicked his ass already long time ago.
Is because the person he most of the time is - when he is with me... until she comes into the picture.
I obviously have an issue of letting someone go - especially if I love the person. But since he is not my first boyfriend I did this already in the past. Im confident I can get someone else.
The only thing that is keeping me close to him:that he has 2 faces. One - the person he is when he is with her - or when he returns from her. And then the other face - where he is the most sweetest, attentive, nicest, loving and caring person I ever had or met.
Only when he is around her he becomes protective over her, and looks like she is the most important woman in his life.
And this is why I struggle so much. Otherwise I would have kicked his ass already long time ago.
Is because the person he most of the time is - when he is with me... until she comes into the picture.
Then he is not truly that second face. You cannot truly be that type of person if you then turn around and disrespect your partner.
The second face is an act when he wants your attention.
You sound like you're in love with the idea of the second face, not the actual person, because the actual person has already told you who he is - it isn't that second face.
You can find someone who is that second face all the time - it will be their only face.
Do you like three somes? If not, terminate the relationship immediately.
Sho nuff!
The original poster asked for advice, but explained why she keeps staying with him. After 3 pages, there is no other advice. You really should get rid of the guy.
After she met me she started talking **** about me to him - how I will be jealous and I will not leave them to be friends which I never did. And howw I don’t speak spanish so I cannot be part of their group...etc. And she didn’t want to hear good things he was telling her about me, she just reproached him how he is ****y friend for hanging out with me too much instead being with her. he kept going to her every weekend.
...she wanted only him and I cannot come because I can’t speak Spanish and they will not be able to communicate.
Please advice!!
P.
I can't come up with any good reason at all that he would tell you all of these mean things she says about you!
Obviously you'd be hurt, and not want anything to do with her.
He's getting off on the drama of having two women want him, and encourages the bad feelings by telling you these things.
When you react he has some new things to tell her so they can laugh and make fun of you.
He's sick. Let him go since he doesn't think he "can be with someone like you", then be happy he left that easily, and your misery is over. Next, you can text "good bye" with happy faces and party icons of your own.
Run. Sounds like they are into each other. He will probably end up marrying her. You deserve better than someone who makes his friend a priority over you.
Hi
PLEASE ADVICE- I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE AND Im LOST!!
I started dating a guy a year ago. We both came to this city to study and the only friend he has here is his female friend from country he comes that studies in the city and hour away. They used to spend every weekend together before we met for 2 years but apparently with no closer relationship history. After we started dating he was continuing partying with her and staying at her place during the weekends -
After she met me she started talking **** about me to him - how I will be jealous and I will not leave them to be friends which I never did. And howw I don’t speak spanish so I cannot be part of their group...etc. And she didn’t want to hear good things he was telling her about me, she just reproached him how he is ****y friend for hanging out with me too much instead being with her. he kept going to her every weekend.
Is it really my fault?
Please advice!!
P.
NO, this is not your fault. He should have stopped going there frequently when he started getting serious with you. He is a total douche bag.
I would not have stayed with that guy for so long and I would have checked his phone probably a lot sooner than you. It is good that you found out he isn't cheating on you, they apparently aren't flirting. BUT - even though he isn't cheating, he is not loyal either.
I would have put a stop to this a long time ago, I don't know how you could have stayed in this situation for so long, it would have driven me nuts after a month.
Get rid of him and find someone who puts you first and doesn't talk crap about you.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
