How important in dating is person's age vs a life stage/maturity?

[deepsix]

Maturity level is more important to me than life stage or age. I'm turned off by a lot of girls my age because they have a different mindset for how they want to live their life right now.

[Parnassia]

Originally Posted by SharpshooterTom

Yeah but without meaning to repeat myself, those people are very rare as I say.

Doesn't matter whether its rare or not. Especially if you happen to be one of the people involved. Define "rare".

FWIW, my youngest sister met her future husband at age 25 while attending a college course he was teaching. He is at least 20 years older, has a married daughter my sister's age. They share the same interests, the same motivations, enjoy many of the same things. She prefers more of a father figure. He likes being the father figure. They have two college age sons (so he has sons who are younger than his granddaughter). They have been happily married for 22 years. If it works for them, who else should bother analyzing them?

[cleasach]

Originally Posted by SharpshooterTom

Say for example you're a woman in your 30s and you have a choice between a guy who is 25 who has is life all together, career going well, living independently vs a guy in also in his 30s the same age who is going back to college still hasn't got his life sorted out and is quite immature about some things?

Surely there comes a point where age is just a number? Technically you'd feel older than someone who's of similar age but acts immature and is at a completely different life stage to you?

I'm just curious how many people take age parameters literally, to the point where there are people who quite a bit outside these parameters but are perhaps great match in every other way?

The 25 year old in the scenario above may think he has it all together but life can change on a dime. Maybe he'd handle adversity like a tool. Maybe he's obnoxious, a crank, too picky, arrogant, etc. but he has a steady job and a house. Big whoop. Maybe the 30 year old going back to college has a heart of gold and many intangibles that women would kill for. It would also depend on what the immaturities are. Going back to college in one's 30s may be viewed as immature-- especially by an arrogant 25 year old who has it "all together with a degree, job and house-- but I certainly don't see it that way. Immaturity is in the eye of the beholder.

I'm with BirdieBelle's original reply that it's a case by case thing.