Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
What are you fighting for? Are the two of you ever going to be in the same place? Are you able to interact enough in a long-distance relationship to even decide if one of you wants to give up everything to move to where the other is? How often do you see each other in person? How far apart are you? Have you talked about your plans and wishes for the future of your relationship?
We're in LDR about 5 months, he said he still loves me when he broke up, I had a chance to talk to him after he dropped the bomb on me, I was never ready for it. I asked him if he doesn't love, if he found someone else, etc until it narrowed down to him no longer can handle the distance between us, he says he keeps falling in love with me but he knows he will never be able to see me, touch me, go out with, he just can't see how the things will unfold, ever. So instead of keeping what we have, fighting what we have, he decided to let go of me. I was so lost, I don't know where to start, a month later I still find myself crying over him. But I have this faith that everything will be alright, that if this is meant to happen then it happened for a reason, I'm gonna learn from it, I know I will move on with my life with or without him. Share your thoughts, thank you!
Have you two ever met in person? Have there ever been any plans to meet in person?
As someone who was given this talk to dismantle the ldr,it came down to one of us not getting our perceived needs met. For him (and most men) , they quantitate 'love' with physicalness.
My need to love isn't based with whether they are here or down the road...so long as we are on this earth...Living. ..breathing and supporting....I was 100% ok with the distance. I certainly missed him. ...yet wasn't distrusting of his where abouts.
So Op (while you are new here), I'm sure your not new to how some folks have to have that physical element dictate their perception of what a relationship is.
Give him his desire to part. He isn't near done learning what genuine love or a relationship entails.
To some people including me, being able to be physical is important. Personally, I don't care how well the person performs, but I enjoy the effort and interaction. One can simply feel displaced without including that. Some want the physicalness more than others. And, you simply can't have physicalness if distance is always a factor.
The only reason to be in a "ldr" (which I consider to be a pretend relationship) is too discourage other guys around you from hitting on you when you feel like being single.
Other then that why bother?
Find a guy you like that you can have a beer with.
LDR only work if it’s temporary and you know when it will end and will be together imo.
I've made it work a number of times. I've been at the same Vermont ski resort in the winter for many years. I've always been Boston. I've dated lots of NY metro women over the years. You see them every weekend for the winter 6 months. In the summer 6 months, you alternate weekends and skip some completely.
My girlfriend/domestic partner was initially 800 miles/2 hour airline flight away. I cashed in a lot of airline miles and bought steeply discounted airline tickets. We now rotate between three New England residences. She usually telecommutes from my Vermont or coastal Massachusetts places on Mondays & Fridays. I'm at her place midweek. At some point, it would be nice if she could land a 100% telecommuting thing so we're not dealing with three addresses.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
