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I guess you're right, but I really like him! I think we would complement each other well. I just don't understand why he hasn't taken up the opportunity to spend time together.
Because he doesn't want to. Either he's not as interested as you think, or he doesn't want to get involved with someone at work. His actions are telling you that he doesn't want to be more than your coworker; respect that and let it go.
OP, you have to just trust that for whatever reason, he does not want to pursue a relationship with you at this time. Perhaps he is in a relationship, or perhaps he is working through some personal issues, or perhaps he is attracted but sees some other incompatibilities with you.
We could speculate till the cows come home about his reasons, but this will only waste your time and emotional energy.
I work with this guy, and it's pretty clear he likes me. He stares at me when he thinks I'm not looking, and then when I catch him, he looks away. The other day I was sitting next to him in a meeting, and his hands were so sweaty, they left the table wet. He can't look me in the eye. Around other people, he avoids and ignores me, but is nice to me when no one else is around.
He sent me a message on Facebook today about something relevant to our work. I replied and thanked him, and then said I'd love to pick his brain [about the topic we were discussing] sometime. Then I sent another message and said I hoped it didn't sound too weird. He replied and said it didn't sound weird, he was just busy at an event, so hadn't had time to reply.
I don't understand - he's showing signs of interest, but doesn't seem interested in even hanging out outside of work. I'm considering asking him out. Maybe just as friends to begin. I don't want to make things at work awkward.
Should I ask him out? If so, how should I do it? What do you suggest?
Thank you!
If you see my recent post in this section of the forum "wait for him?" It might let you know your future with a person like this if you do get together.
In my situation, we worked together too. He had a girlfriend when we first met but I KNEW he liked me. They broke up a few months after we met but it still took a year for us to get together because he did not want to date someone he worked with. He didn't tell me this until we were already in a relationship.
Bottom line, he is either too nervous (mine has anxiety which is making me depressed because he has taken a break from spending time with me.) to ask you out or it's a work thing. If he likes you and he probably does, he doesn't prioritize relationships enough to be a good partner. Find someone else or give it a try if one of you changes jobs because it would be awkward. I don't think he'd necessarily go for it while you're working together. You may be best not to ask. I think the pick your brain comment was enough and if not, get a couple coworkers together for happy hour and invite him to tag along. If he's not going for that, which is not asking him out so shouldn't be pressure or sexual harassment (God forbid, mine also said he was worried about that so did not approach. . .) He's probably not open to dating at work.
Yeah, I'm not seeing any romantic interest there. You think that you make him nervous, but you don't know what he's like when you're not around. He could just be a strong introvert, maybe on the spectrum?
OP sounds more like a high schooler than a working adult. Ohhhhh... I like him! Does he like me back?! What does this mean? @@
????
Sounds high school because she likes him and wonders if he likes her back??!! Ummm... that is pretty much the way it goes for everyone....regardless of age....
I work with this guy, and it's pretty clear he likes me. He stares at me when he thinks I'm not looking, and then when I catch him, he looks away. The other day I was sitting next to him in a meeting, and his hands were so sweaty, they left the table wet. He can't look me in the eye. Around other people, he avoids and ignores me, but is nice to me when no one else is around.
He sent me a message on Facebook today about something relevant to our work. I replied and thanked him, and then said I'd love to pick his brain [about the topic we were discussing] sometime. Then I sent another message and said I hoped it didn't sound too weird. He replied and said it didn't sound weird, he was just busy at an event, so hadn't had time to reply.
I don't understand - he's showing signs of interest, but doesn't seem interested in even hanging out outside of work. I'm considering asking him out. Maybe just as friends to begin. I don't want to make things at work awkward.
Should I ask him out? If so, how should I do it? What do you suggest?
Thank you!
He might just be insecure and nervous around women. If that's true, at that age that's a bad sign.
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