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I got into a couple of interesting discussions today with women and we're starting to wonder what men these days are REALLY looking for. If you had the choice, which would you marry?
1) "Traditional" Woman: Has your children, stays at home to take care of them, cooks well, keeps the house very clean, wears very feminine clothing and keeps herself made up/hair done, etc, has sex whenever the husband wants, does more listening than talking, keeps her opinions to herself.
2) "Modern" Woman: Has a full-time job, earns approximately half of the household income, if she has kids she goes back to work by the time each child is 2-3 years old, cooks and cleans but expects her husband to do half of the work, is fashionable but usually wears jeans as opposed to dresses, likes sex but she needs her needs met in bed, is very aware of the economy, politics, the world, etc. and always states her mind.
Men--please choose which one you would marry and also mention your age and any other background about yourself.
The bolded parts are the important ones. I can handle any combination of the rest...
I gotta ask for specifics on the "traditional" woman though with regards to this. "Having sex whenever I want" and all, does that mean she just lays there? Or does she actually attempt to get into it. I can just go buy a blow-up doll if it's the former...
Oh, I'm a 37 y/o married fellow who likes to complain a lot....
"Modern" Woman:
Has a full-time job... her job is above her man and her marriage
earns approximately half ... she earns $$ and spend $$, not her man's bussiness
if she has kids she goes back to work ... having children is for what???
expects her husband to do half of the work ... she keeps record of her contribution into family versus his contribution, ready to deal with him if he is not doing enough
fashionable but usually wears jeans... her clothing is for work, not for him
likes sex but she needs her needs met in bed... having sex for herself
aware of the economy, politics, the world, etc. ... she tries to be a man...
and always states her mind.... or stating this is what "I" want, for her interest
I got into a couple of interesting discussions today with women and we're starting to wonder what men these days are REALLY looking for. If you had the choice, which would you marry?
1) "Traditional" Woman: Has your children, stays at home to take care of them, cooks well, keeps the house very clean, wears very feminine clothing and keeps herself made up/hair done, etc, has sex whenever the husband wants, does more listening than talking, keeps her opinions to herself.
2) "Modern" Woman: Has a full-time job, earns approximately half of the household income, if she has kids she goes back to work by the time each child is 2-3 years old, cooks and cleans but expects her husband to do half of the work, is fashionable but usually wears jeans as opposed to dresses, likes sex but she needs her needs met in bed, is very aware of the economy, politics, the world, etc. and always states her mind.
Men--please choose which one you would marry and also mention your age and any other background about yourself.
to the guys who say "both": do you mean someone who does all of those things for your sake- or because she thinks it's a great idea herself?
The OP options do not allow for marriage to be a full sharing partnership. Certainly not the type of marriage that is taught from the Bible.
The options given are very selfish, either everything is being done for the husband; or else the wife is only doing things for herself.
In a marriage, I would propose that both male and female must focus themselves on the needs of the household.
I believe that a woman can have OUR children. That she can stay at home to care for them when and if it seems most appropriate for her to do so. With the exception of breast feeding, I am equally enabled to care for children.
A woman who can cook, is nice to have around. It means that I am not cooking all of the time.
I do not care so much about how clean the house is. A clean house rather means that it is not lived in.
I do like females who wear feminine clothing, but such is not a requirement.
I do not care much for make-up on a lady, but again that is my personal preference.
I prefer long straight hair [like my beard], again a preference.
A partnership to be strong needs to be the combining of efforts of 2 or more intelligent people.
An intelligent person must have an opinion on matters. To hold back that opinion, or to fail to listen to such an opinion would be a massive failing for any partnership.
Do you hire an automobile mechanic, so you can ignore his advice? If so then your efforts will fail.
You do not recruit an intelligent person to be on your team and then ignore their counsel. It would be stupid.
A lawyer and an accountant marry each other. Which person should ignore the other? It would be folly for either of them to ignore the other. They are both intelligent, skilled, and highly trained individuals. If they both focus on helping each other to form common goals, if they both seek the counsel of the other; if they both work towards the same goal, as a team; then they will get far more accomplished.
I see no problems with a female having a job, a career, or better yet owning her own business. Like the Biblical example of a 'virtuous Woman' given in the book of Proverbs. She can own her own land, buy and sell her own merchandise and have her own employees.
I do not see why a person should be limited to how much, or a percentage of the household income. As a partner, the focus should now be on the whole.
I once earned far more than my Dw did. I was a career focused professional. My career caused us to travel around the world living in many different locations. My Dw was 'at home' per sa; she owned a few different part-time businesses, she operated them out of our home, and she had employees.
Then we traded places, I became the 'Mr. Mom' and she now earns far more than I do. We try to help each other, to complement each other's skills.
A woman can be strong and stay at home. So can a guy. However, they are NOT independent. Since they DEPEND on the income of the other spouse, they are by definition DEPENDENT on that person's income.
Whether they can go find a job at McDonalds* if something happens and that dependence must be broken doesn't change the fact that they are currently dependent. The antithesis of independent.
*I say McDonalds as an extreme example, because having gaps in your employment (especially 10+ years) can cut down on your job choices, college education or not, male or female. My point here is that the stay at home spouse, be it male or female, cannot claim true independence, unless you think scraping by in poverty is independence...
I probably make $20,000 a year. But I was the sole income earner in most of my relationships.
I agree I started looking for educated men...but will they be wusses....will they stink in the bedroom....I guess ladies won't know unless they try. Personally bad boys are horrible don't waste your time ladies.
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