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Well, for the most part...I dont find that he says positive things. Sometimes I think he is just using the whole reverse psychology thing, He would say..." I know you hate me but.."...and obviously NOT true...we are good friends, so he has to know that, that is not true..so I would just tell him.." Whatever, you know thats crazy, and not true." But it seems like he just wants to see if I will come out and say...ohhh you know I love ya..dont say something like that.
Or..or he would just say little things about himself that are not good, and it seems like he just wants to see if I am going to sit there and say " Ohh...sweetie...thats not true..dont say that about yourself...but to be honest...I am just not that kind of person. I am not at all saying I am not a person that gives praise when its needed..If I think you deserve a compliment or praise..I will go all out, and do everything under the sun to celebrate something good or whatever, but I just recently started to see that, this guy...he seems to be like looking for compliments all the time...=/
Is he just insecure?? He does not seem that way on the outside...but maybe that is how he really feels or something??
This may just be a habit and he might not even realize that he is doing it. The next time he says something like that, stop him and look deep into his eyes and say... "Do you really feel that way about yourself?" Most likely he will say.... "what?" If he says NO. Then ask him... "Why do you say negative things about yourself?" That way you will know his answer because WE couldn't possibly know why he is doing it.
I'll bet as soon as you draw this to his attention he will stop doing it.
excuses excuses...........if the guy is so smart why can't he raise his self esteem on his very own????
Quote:
Originally Posted by 20yrsinBranson
This may just be a habit and he might not even realize that he is doing it. The next time he says something like that, stop him and look deep into his eyes and say... "Do you really feel that way about yourself?" Most likely he will say.... "what?" If he says NO. Then ask him... "Why do you say negative things about yourself?" That way you will know his answer because WE couldn't possibly know why he is doing it.
I'll bet as soon as you draw this to his attention he will stop doing it.
Cut the guy some slack. He's only 21 yrs old. He really hasn't found himself yet. I do like the idea of calling him on it and asking him why he does that. If he is just fishing for complements, there are worse things in the world. If he is really that insecure, he might grow out of it. I was extremely insecure with a low self-esteem at that age. It took me a long time to figure out how awesome I am.
There is another possibility. This could be his way of flirting. This thread brought back memories of that single, dating, flirting time when you analyze everything that comes out of that certain-special-person's mouth. *sigh*
I do not feel sorry for you or this guy. If you are insecure work on it on your own time. Stop controlling people. You people are very off beat sometimes....
I learned in life that you have to give yourself your own rewards and your own compliments. Every now and again you will hear good stuff out of people. Sometimes you can request some validation from friends and family....at least you are being honest and upfront about it.
That is my opinion!!!!!!
Quote:
Originally Posted by SactoBankerGirl
Cut the guy some slack. He's only 21 yrs old. He really hasn't found himself yet. I do like the idea of calling him on it and asking him why he does that. If he is just fishing for complements, there are worse things in the world. If he is really that insecure, he might grow out of it. I was extremely insecure with a low self-esteem at that age. It took me a long time to figure out how awesome I am.
There is another possibility. This could be his way of flirting. This thread brought back memories of that single, dating, flirting time when you analyze everything that comes out of that certain-special-person's mouth. *sigh*
I do not feel sorry for you or this guy. If you are insecure work on it on your own time. Stop controlling people. You people are very off beat sometimes....
I learned in life that you have to give yourself your own rewards and your own compliments. Every now and again you will hear good stuff out of people. Sometimes you can request some validation from friends and family....at least you are being honest and upfront about it.
That is my opinion!!!!!!
I don't remember asking anyone to feel sorry for me. (???) You seem a little hostile today. Is everything okay with you?
By 29 you will be sick of propping up men's egos. Until then just don't let one drag you down.
HA HA you have got to be kidding. You cannot have a successful relationship with a man without propping up his ego - on a daily - sometimes minute-by-minute basis. LOL
It's normal for guys to be goofy when they're young. Just be sweet. It's nothing to worry about.
That's the feeling I'm getting too. All my buds from college were like that. They used to crack me up... miss those guys!
Don't read into it too much.
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