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Seriously, I'm sorry it didn't work out but it sounds like you have the right attitude. I'm sure one you're ready to try again, it won't take too long before the women are all beating down your door.
Hey MG. I'm sorry things didn't work out. You did seem to get involved pretty quickly, but I had hoped things were going well. Kudos to you for a nice clean pain-free break - that is so hard to do sometimes. Glad you are able to see this as a learning experience...we all should be so lucky.
Seriously, I'm sorry it didn't work out but it sounds like you have the right attitude. I'm sure one you're ready to try again, it won't take too long before the women are all beating down your door.
Thanks for the kind words....yeah...based on my past experience I will probably have some opportunities to date soon enough (amazing what hitting the gym 4-5 days a week does to your internet dating traffic. )
I'm not trying to sound gallant or anything but I seriously don't want to hurt anyone with MY issues. People my age ALL have baggage if they are dating...I don't want to hurt myself or anyone else so that's my big challenge.
I think I will wait until late April because then it will be >1 year since my wife's death and while that is arbitrary to me it is a psychological magic number for alot of people it seems. Seriously, it does **** me off a little when people with NO clue of my situation weigh in on "how long it should take" without considering the whole terminal diagnosis \ declining quality of life situation as opposed to just an instant car wreck etc.
Seriously, it does **** me off a little when people with NO clue of my situation weigh in on "how long it should take" without considering the whole terminal diagnosis \ declining quality of life situation as opposed to just an instant car wreck etc.
Actually I joined a widows/widowers group shortly after my husbands death and found the differences fascinating. If you can find such a support group I highly recommend you do so. It was very....refreshing to talk without fear of offending people or freaking them out.
Hey MG. I'm sorry things didn't work out. You did seem to get involved pretty quickly, but I had hoped things were going well. Kudos to you for a nice clean pain-free break - that is so hard to do sometimes. Glad you are able to see this as a learning experience...we all should be so lucky.
Just counting my blessings. I am an AMAZINGLY blessed individual aside from this occurrence. I have 2 great healthy kids, great family, great job etc. etc. etc. I have even used this experience to take better care of myself so I'm healthier and around for my kids etc. (losing 45lbs.)
I went through *A LOT* during the year and a half it took my wife to slowly die. I promised myself after that, I would not dwell on the negatives but would look toward the future and be happy for my mental health and my kids. So far, I am doing pretty well.....I just need a little more time and to find that right person.
Actually I joined a widows/widowers group shortly after my husbands death and found the differences fascinating. If you can find such a support group I highly recommend you do so. It was very....refreshing to talk without fear of offending people or freaking them out.
I've been thinking about that more and more. Thanks! I will see what I can find on the internet tomorrow. I usually hate that kind of stuff (hey, I'm a guy) but I see the value.
Just counting my blessings. I am an AMAZINGLY blessed individual aside from this occurrence. I have 2 great healthy kids, great family, great job etc. etc. etc. I have even used this experience to take better care of myself so I'm healthier and around for my kids etc. (losing 45lbs.)
I went through *A LOT* during the year and a half it took my wife to slowly die. I promised myself after that, I would not dwell on the negatives but would look toward the future and be happy for my mental health and my kids. So far, I am doing pretty well.....I just need a little more time and to find that right person.
I can't even imagine how much that took out of you, and I have nothing but admiration for you being able to have such a positive attitude. You have a tremendous amount to offer the right person; I expect you will have LOTS of gals to get back in the saddle with! (Didn't mean that quite the way it sounded!! )
Thanks for the kind words....yeah...based on my past experience I will probably have some opportunities to date soon enough (amazing what hitting the gym 4-5 days a week does to your internet dating traffic. )
I'm not trying to sound gallant or anything but I seriously don't want to hurt anyone with MY issues. People my age ALL have baggage if they are dating...I don't want to hurt myself or anyone else so that's my big challenge.
I think I will wait until late April because then it will be >1 year since my wife's death and while that is arbitrary to me it is a psychological magic number for alot of people it seems. Seriously, it does **** me off a little when people with NO clue of my situation weigh in on "how long it should take" without considering the whole terminal diagnosis \ declining quality of life situation as opposed to just an instant car wreck etc.
All my best!
I think you have a lot less baggage than some guys who have a divorce or two in their past. At least you had a successful marriage. It wasn't two years of fighting and cheating before a nasty divorce. Based on some of my past boyfriends, I'd probably prefer to date a widower who has moved on from the past and has well adjusted kids, than a divorced guy who is still fighting with the ex over child support, property division, etc. and whose kids are messed up because Mom and Dad hate each other.
Ok, I am fairly new here, although an avid poster..new just the same. I liked your story and from the way you seem to have things together, looks like you will more than likely find someone real soon. I too went through losing a spouse. My second husband had a heart attack at age 42 and died. I had known him forever and we had been middle school sweethearts so it was a special relationship. Prior to his death, I had spent 3 weeks non stop at the hospital waiting for him to be well enough to take home while at the same time knowing that the other shoe could drop at any point..he was very sick. We had only been married a year when he died.
I ABSOLUTELY had not intentions of marrying yet a third time but BAM there he was and we instantly fell in love. I didn't have any small kids to worry about at that time and even if I had, I am positive this man would have made a perfect Dad for them.
Yes, I feel you will marry at some point but when you are ready...and when you are not looking someone special will come along and knock your socks off.
I think you have a lot less baggage than some guys who have a divorce or two in their past. At least you had a successful marriage. It wasn't two years of fighting and cheating before a nasty divorce. Based on some of my past boyfriends, I'd probably prefer to date a widower who has moved on from the past and has well adjusted kids, than a divorced guy who is still fighting with the ex over child support, property division, etc. and whose kids are messed up because Mom and Dad hate each other.
Yeah, balancing my needs with my kids needs is my hardest thing right now.
I agree, I know I don't have that much baggage...very little actually. Just going through a lot of big lifestyle changes with single-parenthood etc. etc. My biggest problem (which I think I have mostly solved now) is just getting used to dating again and the fact that dating at this age with kids etc. is just a whole different animal.
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Ok, so at First I didn't Succeed LOL
